Something's missing: WWYD?

[Anonymous]

As a guest, I recently had an experience that left a sour taste despite the stay itself being perfectly nice. Let it be said that the host was not a master of communication - I got no response from a post-booking message asking for check-in instructions, but when we turned up at the property at the listed check-in time his assistant was there to give us a proper (though unmasked/undistanced) tour. There were no follow-up messages, which was totally fine with me because our needs were all accounted for. And anyway, given that there was no internet access, I wouldn't have received any correspondence from Airbnb messenger anyway.

A few hours after checking ourselves out and leaving, I received just one sentence from the host:  "Where's the grey blanket?"  A bit abrupt, but hey, it's Germany. I explained in detail how we'd left our used towels and linens to separate them from the unused ones, and assured him that we didn't take any house items out of the property. He followed up with a more accusatory message insisting that the blanket was missing. The item in question had been a topping for one of those modular sofa-beds that tends to swallow things when it's pulled out. After a bit of back-and-forth I suggested that he check the crevices of his sofa. No response. It's a pretty small and sparse space, so I presume that the host eventually found his blanket in a sofa crack but was too embarrassed to say so.

For some perspective, we're talking about one of those thin synthetic fleeces they sell for €2 at Ikea. The host might be frustrated because they keep getting lost or damaged by guests misusing them as beach blankets. It wasn't unreasonable for him to ask. It also made sense that he reached out before having enough time to do a thorough search, because there might have been a chance I was still in town and able to return something I'd mistakenly packed. And I'd rather clear it up in messaging than get a surprisingly bad review. But still, from a hospitality perspective I was struck by how the entirety of the way this person represented himself to a guest was through hot pursuit of a bit of polyester. It's a minor issue that I won't downrate the host over, but it definitely ended any consideration I'd had of re-booking the place later in the autumn or recommending it to friends. It's hard to feel at ease in a home knowing the host believes you're out to fleece them for their fleeces.

This got me thinking about the delicate etiquette of approaching missing items in general. Hosts, when you can't find something during changeover, how do you communicate with guests about it?  Is there a minimum that the item would have to be worth in order to say anything at all, or would you still ask about the washcloth or wine glass out of principle? If the results are inconclusive, do you mention it in the review?

[Sarah977]

@Anonymous  I've never had anything go missing, but if I did, I'd nicely ask the guest about it (not "Where's the...."),  although not before first doing a thorough look-round. I certainly wouldn't charge a guest for some item that only cost a few bucks. It wouldn't even be worth it to spend time sending a request for that.

I know some cultures are blunter in communication than others, but if it were me, I wouldn't give this host anything more than a 4* in communication, if that- not necessarily for the blanket question, but because they never bothered to answer the message about check-in. And I would have been pretty upset about a maskless, non-distancing meet and greet. It wouldn't inspire confidence that the place had been properly sanitized, no matter how clean it looked.

[Charles224]

@Anonymous , when the towels are so very, very fluffy you can hardly close the suitcase... In my experience, the cheaper the listing, the more paranoid the owner. 

[Anonymous]

@Charles224  I can kind of understand - if you price the listing too low, there's not enough of a buffer to cover incidental damages and losses. This wouldn't have been the case in the place I stayed - it was priced quite profitably for the region (though knowing that hosts are still recovering from the lockdown, I wasn't after a bargain).

[Katrina79]

@Anonymous @I’ve hosted so many guests and never really have anything go walkies. Just recently I hosted a guest who tried to ask for me to wave the cleaning fee and I didn’t oblige. The guest instant booked anyway, but since the check out I’ve noticed an entire list of items missing:

full unused 100 pack of Lysol wipes

bath mat

door mat

2 unused Face Tissue

Added up I’m guessing they equal the cost of the cleaning fee. Very rude. I’m not asking the guest where they went, because I already know. One thing maybe hiding or a mistake but these four things, nah, they were taken. Very strange and bizarre behaviour and I have many other more valuable things to take, so I have no idea why they took what they did. It doesn’t matter to me why they took them, they are getting a negative review from me and a thumbs down 👎. 

[Sarah977]

@Katrina79  Maybe they took those things rather than things that were more valuable because they had a use for those items? And they could always claim they simply used up the Lysol wipes and tissues. Or they figured that you wouldn't dare call them out (haha, little do they know) for a missing door mat or bath mat, whereas they would be charged for theft if they made off with the TV?

[Linda108]

Good discussion about both the communication and the quirks of guests.  I think it is great for hosts to experience the guest side after they have been a host for a while.  

[Robin4]

@Anonymous 

Andrew, I think some people are just not cut out to be hosts, their people skills are non existent and tact is not something that ever crossed their mind!

These people are better running a parking station where all they are required to do is rent a vacant space for a given amount of time with no contact, for an electronic monetary reward.

We are all different and we look for different things in a listing as travelers. The most important thing for me are those past reviews.....the most important thing for me is....... how was the host perceived!

I do a few trips a year interstate and I have my regular hosts who I stay with along the way who I know will sit with me over a wine or two, have a laugh, tell a few tall stories, and simply 'chew the fat' as we say. It makes for a lovely experience every time. And for that reason I would never contemplate staying anywhere else. I have my 3 regulars....and that is that.

Others do not want what I expect out of a hosting....so be it!

I feel the best way to tackle a difficult situation in a review is with humour. Once again that is easy for me to say because I interact with my guests and have the ability to assess if humour is appropriate.

*

I lost a lounge arm covering (an antimacassar).....it was a guest who lived the other side of the country who was here for a few days with her mother. I just sent a message in the message stream ......

 Got a 5 star review....and got my antimacassar back!

Cheers.......Rob

[Anonymous]

@Robin4  In this case, the past reviews were all very positive, but notably none mentioned the host by name or the hospitality. For what it's worth, the location doesn't attract many international visitors, and northern German culture values getting straight to the point without any unnecessary gentility. If you run into an old acquaintance on the street, the first thing they might say is "you've gotten fatter!" but where I come from, that would be an extinction-level event for the acquaintance and may well end in gunfire.

[Gordon0]

Despite being AWOL for some time, I actually think communication skills are really important when it comes to what we all do. While I take care not to bombard my guests with pleasantries, I do always check in on them.

On the subject of missing items, I once (thankfully) had a car-crash of a hosting experience in which a chav of a guest smoked in my room and drank my mini-bar dry (without paying). Soon after ejecting her from my house, I couldn't find the TV remote, so ran after her and demanded she hand it over. Long story short; she hadn't trousered it, I just hadn't seen it. 

Naturally, because she'd been a horror of a guest, I didn't fess up. 

Back to checking in on guests. Last week's absolute treasure sent me a stroppy note when I enquired to how she'd settled in. To say I wasn't expecting it was to put it lightly. And the 'isn't ideal' line always rattles me.

 

Of course, she could have stayed at her mum's house. Or perhaps she wasn't welcome.

I *hope* I always think before I hit send, because it isn't nice to be on the receiving end of a strop-a-gram.

[Sarah977]

@Gordon0  I just can't fathom why people don't look after their own needs which they are well aware of. 

I'm easily woken by light and sound. So for almost all my life I've travelled with my soft floppy pillow that I can drape over my head and eyes to block out light and I also always have earplugs with me. 

It appears that common sense is in short supply these days and people expect others to anticipate and cater to their own personal and varying needs. Sad state of affairs.