Hello @Jules22,
You can't see if other hosts have clicked not to recommend a guest. As far as I understand it, that clickable option is for the feature that allows hosts with instant book to specify that they want only guests with recommendations from other hosts.
The instant book "Recommendations from other hosts" feature is completely independent of the text in guest reviews.
Software isn't yet able to reliably interpret free form human written text.
You don't have instant booking so I sincerely hope that the text of the review you gave her mentioned the facts you included in this post. That is so as other hosts who, like you, don't use instant booking, can be fore warned about her. If you haven't mentioned it in the review then other hosts can't know that there was a problem.
Release yourself from the tyrany that is the fear of a bad review. You always have the option of responding to a review.
If someone shows with extra people or somehow incurs an extra charge at checkin then they don't get in until they accept the charge or booking change.
Steve.