How would you rate another host who stayed at your place & started off a bit rude?

[Ladan1]

I'll preface this by saying that I've been burned by other hosts who stayed as guests in the past — that's a story for another day 🙂

This host stayed with us as a guest over Xmas and New Year's. They arrived late into the night and messaged us around 2am and said:

It’s very disappointing that we have been in the home for 3 hours and we are still freezing. My 5 year daughter and I still have our coats on. Not good!!

Not trying to make excuses, but Bay Area nights are cold and houses take a little while to heat up. There's a heater in the home as well as a couple radiators. The way she phrased the message though was a bit off-putting. Or maybe I'm too sensitive?

Anyway, we messaged them around 6am and it sounds like they never turned the house heater on and just used the radiators. We apologized for the inconvenience and they said all was well. To make even greater amends, we made homemade chocolate & granola and brought it over to them on Xmas day. We then checked up with them a couple times during their stay and they said everything was doing well and that they were enjoying themselves.

Upon check out, they did something weird in that they left an open bag of garbage laying on our kitchen floor with the contents falling out onto the ground.

They just left us a review, and I have a weird suspicion that they wrote something about the heater even though they hadn't initially turned it on and gave us a low rating. Again, this might be because of a bad past experience with another host.

What would y'all do in this case? Would you write an honest review stating that things got off to a rocky start and that they left their garbage on the floor upon check out, but otherwise were good guests? Or would you give your standard boilerplate "they were good guests. happy to host again!" review?

[Emilia42]

@Ladan1 

I definitely agree with you about the tone of her message. That would really put me off as well. If I was your guest, I would have written: "It's pretty chilly in here. We have the small heaters on but they don't seem to be warming the place. Am I missing something? Going to bed now (it's 3am) and we'll be warm under the covers. Let's chat about it in the morning, thanks!" And then I would base my review off your response/action. But not everyone is as easy going as me 🙂

As others have said, there isn't really anything concert to write a bad review. I would give them a 4 star for communication and then write something pretty bland and neutral. "XX stayed over the holiday's. While there was some minor miscommunication about the heaters in the house, they communicated their concerns and followed house rules. Then 'No, I would not host again.'

[Lisa723]

@Ladan1 my two cents... what did these guests actually do wrong?  (1) They were cold, didn't figure out your heater, and messaged you about it in a way that ruffled your feathers, and (2) left an open bag of garbage, which they may have overlooked and/or which may have toppled after they left(?) -- If those are the only issues, I would not mention either in a review and would give them the standard "happy to host again." I would also do something to make how to turn on the heat unavoidably obvious.

If this guest leaves you a poor review, your having left her a poor one doesn't accomplish anything except some kind of preemptive revenge-- I don't see any value in that. (Although I totally get how an unjustified poor review stings.) And if she leaves you a good one, you might not feel great about having punished her in advance.

I think the best thing to do about a poor review is respond briefly, professionally, and dispassionately, for the benefit of other prospective guests only.

[Sarah977]

@Lisa723 @Ladan1  I agree that it's more than possible that the bag of garbage toppled over after they left- if the place was otherwise left in a decent state, it doesn't seem likely that they just left a bag of garbage spilling out onto the floor. They could have been rushing out the door with a fussy, cranky child in arms, and not noticed that the bag was left in a way that it could fall over. It hardly seems like a major transgression to me.

[Linda108]

@Ladan1   You have 4 entire home listings with over 180 very positive reviews.  Reviews should be the least of your concerns.  I agree with @Sarah977  that given the weather in SF over the holidays, the heater should have been set to give a base warm so it would heat up quickly when the guests arrived.  Who knows why the guest did not realize about the heater, but they are the strangers and probably need good notes to help acclimate to the home.  Dealing with a child late at night might play into the terse message.  Your response the next day was appropriate and caring.

[Mike-And-Helen0]

@Ladan1 I agree with @Piotr48 and @Sarah977 here.

Review calmly and honestly, 

X had trouble using our heating and messaged us in the small hours because they were cold. They could have taken more care with rubbish in the listing.

I always turn on the heating full blast to warm the place up for guests if it is cold outside. It isn't really welcoming otherwise.

[Mark116]

@Ladan1  It depends on whether there are directions on how to use the heaters that are easy to find.  If the answer there is 'yes'...there are directions, then I would consider it rude and the fault of the guest for not paying attention.  If the answer is 'no' then you should rectify it with a house manual or directions some other way.  

I don't think you would want to host these people again, so why say so?  Leaving open garbage is extremely disrespectful.  Leaving rude messages at 2am is also disrespectful and generally pretty dumb as few people are going to read a message at that time.

You might say something like XX was YY [something positive], but overall we found them to be a bit high maintenance and challenging as guests and despite the fact they are fellow hosts, we are not sure they are a good fit as guests on the platform.