Refusing a booking request/guest arguing

[Laura2592]

We have IB and have the filters set up so that guests without recommendations from hosts have to send a request. Got a recent booking request from someone with 17 reviews, 3 of which were terrible, 4 were neutral and the rest good (most recent being neutral). Scrolling through what the guest left for others, there is a pattern of peevish, nitpicky or (at best) neutral reviews for hosts and a few really lambast-y ones over issues that the host's responses show are really guest problems. I decided to decline. The reservation request started with a very "woe is me, I have a birthday during COVID" message. None of this felt like it would be a good fit.

When I declined I said "Thanks so much for your interest in our cottage! Unfortunately we won't be able to accommodate you at this time as we only host guests who have recommendations from other hosts. Hope you have a great birthday and find a fantastic place to stay!"

The guest emailed back and is arguing, demanding to know who didn't recommend her (bullet dodged.) Unsure how to respond to this, and really don't want to get into it with this guest. Any thoughts?

[Laura2592]

I had contacted some of the hosts she stayed with and the last one replied saying "Nightmare guest. I could fill a book. Do not make the mistake I did and overlook her reviews." So I feel as though my decision was the right one. Host review was very brief and neutral. I wish people would be more frank when they have a bad experience but that is a topic for another thread....

[Lawrene0]

The COVID birthday thing is funny, @Laura2592 , as we are coming up on a year, and so, um, everyone has or had a COVID birthday... But, yeah, I get that plea here, too. Right now we're in grey-level lockdown, but there are "it's my birthday!" folks trying to talk me into opening just for them. As well as it being their birthday (or their boy/girlfriend's birthday), they need "a well-deserved break", etc.

The fine is something like $100,000, and even in Canadian dollars that's a lot. 🙂

Anyway, just blame the system. It's got big shoulders. 

"Oh, hosts cannot see who didn't recommend, so I can't help you there. Again, hope you do find the perfect place!" 

[Laura2592]

@Lawrene0good point! Yes I had a COVID birthday and so did the hubs . Haha didn't think about that.

I sometimes wonder why people who have a good number of stays with a low overall rating keep booking. Its not like they seem to be happy with their experiences.....

[Lawrene0]

Some people love nothing to be good enough for them, I guess, @Laura2592 ? 

When "nightmare" is the adjective others use for them, it might be a bit beyond that, though. 

Bullet dodged indeed!

[Colleen253]

@Laura2592  Sounds like a massive bullet dodged. Good thing you were paying attention! You should probably have refused with a message (pick one, any one) that would not have left the door open for arguing. If it were me, I would block/ignore. Answering back with anything further is "getting into it with this guest". 

[Ann72]

@Laura2592  That's so great you reached out to other hosts!  Agree with @Colleen253 - this guest doesn't deserve one more second of your time.  Just keep archiving her messages if the blocking doesn't work so you don't have to see them.

[Emilia42]

@Laura2592 I got a booking request like that once (a number of pretty good reviews and one clear 'would not recommend.') This leads me to believe that clicking "would not host again" is all that is needed to hold up a guest from the instant booking (so long as the host has the requirement set.) Can you see the guest's star ratings?

[Mark116]

@Laura2592  I know that our reviews are probably too subtle, such as if I say nice things but don't say I would recommend to other hosts/would love to have them back..... that means they were okay, not great.  If I say they were a better fit for a hotel it means they were atrocious.  I would never give a great!! review to a bad guest, but there is a lot of downside to triggering someone with a bad review, as we see on here, and not much up side, especially now that almost all of our guests are driving here from 0-4 hours away.  

[Anonymous]

@Laura2592  Once you've declined a booking, there's no further obligation to correspond with the guest. Why bother? What can possibly be gained from that? 

Also, it's pretty rare for a guest profile to have more than one negative review. It takes a real stinker to accomplish that feat, so going to all the trouble of contacting the prior hosts seems like extremely unnecessary diligence. Whether it's a crappy booking request or a lecherous stranger at a bar, you don't owe anyone an apology or explanation for saying NO. 

[Sarah977]

I guess I should have started a self-pity topic post whining about how I spent my October birthday alone. Christmas and New Year's, too. 

[Tommy150]

Very simple, do not respond.  Just let it go and don't engage.

I wish Airbnb had a block feature without "reporting" someone. 

[Lawrene0]

I'm changing my tune, @Laura2592 . After reading the responses, I agree that further engagement with that user is unnecessary and unhelpful. 

Nearly all my inquiries right now are from locals. Way too local. So I'm going the extra step of being very polite while telling them no, and not leaving them hanging so to speak.

But, yes to @Anonymous 's reminder that we don't owe apologies or explanations for a no. I need to remember that. Also, your "bullet" knows perfectly well why you said no. 

[Robbie54]

@Laura2592  as you've already responded with a declined booking just leave it, ignore them. 

[Laura2592]

Thanks everyone. I responded with "I wish you the best in finding a great place to stay." After additional emails I finally got one that said it "stung" to be "rejected" and she was a great guest who had never been rejected before..."an inauspicious start to the year and really negative experience for my COVID birthday" but no more messages after that.

This was clearly not a good guest. Maybe she will start complaining online and someone will explain that with so many reviews others can easily IB. I had 3 bookings this weekend with no issue from IB. I do wonder how long the "I do not recommend this guest" stays on an account. I would think it would have to be in the last year...anyone know?