Sharing-- maybe this is the new normal?

[Laura2592]

A friend of mine has a nice furnished condo in a major city in Florida. She has spent the last few months rehabbing it (she inherited it) and making it ready to rent. She talked to me at length about putting it up on ABB/VRBO and decided against it due to various issues (parties, reviews, fees, lack of support, etc.) She is remote, so hired a realtor to get it listed and rented for 6 months instead. It rented right away at good rate to a retired couple who were fully vetted/credit checked.

The place looks great from what I can tell of the listing and pics/videos. Its not high end luxury but its certainly very nice and new: I am sure some hosts would put it in the "luxury" category. Her tenants showed up over the weekend. They have already said:

1. the screen porch is too hot. 
2. the bed isn't what they like
3. they can't figure out the (brand new) dishwasher so it "probably doesn't work".
4. the smart lock doesn't work (they pressed it too many times because they were inputting in the wrong code. She left them a regular key which they prefer. They said it was "too sunny" and they couldn't see the keypad. {sunglasses?})
5. the screen door sticks.
6. the neighbors upstairs are on their balcony too much.

She is ready to pack it in. She has someone on site who went over and addressed the concerns about the dishwasher and screen door in 5 minutes. 

Is this the new normal? Is it that people are now used to reviewing every cookie they eat, every word someone utters that they are all hyper critical? Or is this somehow pandemic related? A Pandemic Karen Syndrome (PKS if you want to use the shorthand), where, deprived of the ability to make choices about travel for a period of time, many adults have regressed to a peevish, unable-to-be-satisifed tantrum that stunts the ability to perform simple tasks or figure things out with a base level of resilience? 

We were toying with the idea of a 3 or 6 month lease to a tenant at our cottage but now I am not so sure. 

[Huma0]

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@Fred13 wrote:

can you bring me out a new set of eye-lashes!  because mine fell off while snorkeling (

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Possibly the funniest Airbnb request I've ever heard.

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Laura2592  you are right about custom-designed Instagram...  My family also rents long-term rooms and apartments. Until a few years ago there was only some old furniture and a bare mattress and everything else tenants have to bring with them.

It changed.

People saw too many beautiful listings of STR apartments and expect the same for the quarter of the price - TV, internet, bedding, fully equipped kitchen, vacuum cleaner... even decorations like pictures on the walls and throw pillows. So, now some landlords decorate everything for a photoshoot to show how the place may look like when the tenant moves in and then when it is rented they just remove all decoration.  I did the same and it works.

[Huma0]

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@Branka-and-Silvia0 wrote:

So, now some landlords decorate everything for a photoshoot to show how the place may look like when the tenant moves in and then when it is rented they just remove all decoration.  I did the same and it works.

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But doesn't this just raise the expectations and then encourage them to complain that that stuff isn't there/it looks different.

[Colleen253]

@Laura2592 “The question is, how do we push the reset button on this?”

I think you need to just move. You’re welcome to come on over here. It’s great, and so are the guests (you know, Canadians, they’re so

polite and nice) 🙃Winters are long and cold, yes, but we get more sunshine than we really should be entitled to. See you soon.

[Helen427]

@Laura2592 

There will always be people who complain about the weather regardless of age.

In relation to Technology I think we all need to be mindful others may or may not have been introduced or used the Tech some now do and take for granted others know how to use it.

It's a little like those who have lived through various states of Wireless - when it was a Radio operated by waves and that today's generation call Wifi.

Funny how the world is back where it was 100 years ago with Technology in so many areas of our lives.

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Helen427 

 😄

[Bonnie7]

Must be Arizona! 😄

[Pat271]

@Laura2592 asks: “The question is, how do we push the reset button on this?”

Although guests may have become more entitled, depressed, demanding picky, etc. as of late, human nature is to gravitate towards behaviors that are successful. Guests are doing what they have found works. Over time, hosts jumping through hoops to respond to unreasonable requests and granting refunds for ridiculous complaints has trained guests to look for reasons to complain, and to demand refunds more and more often.

All is not lost, however. Hosts can help in the rehabilitation of our guests.

We have got to stop giving in to the fear of bad reviews, and letting that fear possess us to respond to guests beyond what is reasonable and/or what qualifies as sound under our own policies. I believe this one tendency is responsible for a significant amount of bad guest behavior, in particular the demand for refund epidemic.

I know it’s painful to imagine a bad review sitting on your listing, what it might do to your ranking, and ultimately, what it might do to your financial bottom line. But if you have been reasonable and fair with your guests, you can simply respond to a bad review with your perspective and how you attempted to remediate real issues. Also, when complaints are reasonable, you can demonstrate your integrity and your desire to make things right.

When complaints are unreasonable, you can calmly and professionally explain the expectations that were set, and how you met those expectations. There have been some “bad” reviews that I have been thankful for, because responding gave me the opportunity to show my nature and attitudes as a host.

Also, establishing a rapport with your guest, even if you are remote, is invaluable. There is an expression “You are not buying the product, you are buying the salesperson”. Be lighthearted and cordial, but firm. Guests have a harder time complaining and leaving bad reviews when they feel warmly towards you.

However, there should be VERY few circumstances in which you should give money back to guests. A severe situation like no power, water, or other shortcomings that render a property uninhabitable may warrant some sort of compensation, but for more minor conditions, strive to offer a free activity, dinner certificate, discount off their next stay, but NOT a refund. If they ask for money, rather than say no, offer them one of the above instead. Frame everything in the positive, and do it only for the failure of a promised expectation.

The problem is that unless the majority of us do this as a team, this bad guest behavior will continue, and will probably get worse. Maybe with enough time, discussion, and agreement amongst us, and the collective setting of some standards, we can help to turn the tide.   

[Kelly149]

@Pat271  this is well said, one quibble that I have and that is refunds should happen for things which the host has some control/responsibility over. Ie cleaning not done well, missing or misrepresented amenities. However, in regard to municipal utilities hosts are at the mercy of others. And I have hosted during both a widespread water outage & a massive power & water outage. In both instances the guests wanted to be here & were willing to deal with the inconvenience. Just a slight difference, but I would have let them not stay, but I didn’t offer them any $$ and in both cases they were glad for the space & recognized they would have had same problem anywhere. 

[Sarah977]

@Kelly149  I'm with you on that. If the power goes out for a significant period of  time, and the host doesn't provide the guest with the same things they themselves would use in such an instance- a cooker with ice to stash their milk and things that go bad quickly, a flashlight, a lantern or candles, then some discount might be in order. But if the guest chooses to stay and you've made them as comfortable as possible considering the circumstances, that's just life. It doesn't need a refund or discount thrown at it. 

And of course an area that is prone to power outages, or other disruptions should be mentioned in the listing. I would never promise constantly reliable Wifi, even though I just switched to another system that just became available, which is now unlimited and higher speed (formerly I had metered Wifi through the cell signal, which was expensive and not reliable), because the power here can go out without any warning, rendering the Wifi tower dead. So if a guest needed to work online, they could probably do that without a problem most of the time, but I would never assure them that they wouldn't possibly lose the signal in the middle of an important zoom call and certainly wouldn't refund them for it.

I also think hosts should stop referring to giving some money back to a guest for something the host is responsible for as a "refund". A refund is something a guest gets if they cancel, if they never arrive or have to leave early for some reason, or the host wants them gone. 

Even if you feel an inconvenience, like the fridge or the hot water heater going on the fritz, taking a day to remedy, deserves a free night, let's call it a discount, not a refund. Just like if you find a piece of clothing in  a store that has buttons missing, or a rip in the seam, you'd get a discount if you still wanted it. You'd only get a "refund" if you took it back to the store, saying you didn't want it.

[Huma0]

@Sarah977 

Agreed.

As I've mentioned before, I used to stay in a lot of 5 star hotels for my work. Even in those, things like this happen.

Here are a couple of examples:

1. Staying in Barcelona when it was 35C + outside. One morning, the water goes off. Everyone heads to breakfast and then back to their rooms to shower because it had been sorted. Only, it hadn't been sorted in my room. I bought some bottled water to brush my teeth etc. Hours later, having been running around for work in that heat, my water is still off.

Hotel receptionists say there's nothing they can do because it's the local council's responsibility. More hours pass. I am about to throw a hissy fit because they simply don't seem to care. "There's nothing we can do," they say. I tell them they could relocate me to a room with water, seeing as all my colleagues have it but  I can't even flush the toilet. This is a five star hotel! At this point, the water in my room comes back on. Did I get a refund? No. Did I get a discount? No. Because the hotel staff said it was out of their control.

2. Staying at a hotel in Belgrade. I decide to have a glass of wine, but when I have my first sip, realise there is a pip from a date in the glass and now in my mouth. Gross. I tell reception. They don't care. I make a fuss, explaining that the pip had likely been in someone else's mouth. That's pretty disgusting. What was it doing in the glass?  Cleaning standards not up to a 5* hotel. This was something within their control. Did I get a refund? No. Did I get a discount? No. But they did send up a complimentary bottle of wine.

Before I sound like a complete fuss pot, I don't normally complain when I stay in hotels, B&Bs, Airbnbs, whatever. It's only the very rare instance. My point is, that even 5* hotels do not hand out refunds willy-nilly. Why should we?

[Pat271]

@Kelly149  Yes, I agree that on widespread power or water outages, severe weather, etc., it can be chocked up to “Sh*t happens” and everyone needs to make the best of it.

The less-than-optimal events in which I felt compelled to offer some recompense were local to my place, and I felt the guest was very inconvenienced.

In the case of the first event, imagine a lake running out of a pipe in the bathroom wall down to the floor, out of the bathroom, into the bedroom and living room, and the guest calling you and saying, “Well, there was a lake in here, and we can’t use the master shower, but it’s ok, we got it all soaked up with towels and bedding, and we can use the other shower”. Argh. Even though it was “not my fault”, and even though the guest was so nice about it and didn’t ask for anything, I still sent a plumber right over, and felt compelled to give a “discount” to the guest (See what I did there @Sarah977 ?😉) of 1 day of her 4-day stay.

Another time some wires got crossed with the housekeeping team, and it was the only time since I’ve been hosting that a cleaning didn’t take place for a guest arrival. 😩 A host’s worst nightmare (well, on second thought maybe I can think of worse nightmares!). Anyway, the guest was again very nice as I fell all over myself with apologies. Again without being asked, I sent her out to eat with a $100 restaurant certificate while my housekeeper rushed over and cleaned the place.

Rare occurrences, both…but ones in which I really felt for the guests and wanted to make a bad situation a little better for them. Now that I read this, I realize that both times involved really nice guests who didn’t demand anything. Maybe there’s a pattern there…

[Sarah977]

@Pat271  I love this and agree with it wholeheartedly. 

I am always gobsmacked when hosts post about guests who are behaving outrageously, to the point of destroying the house or upsetting the neighbors, and are wringing their hands, wondering what to do, saying, " If I confront them, I'm sure I'll get a bad review".

To me, that's like dithering about running out of a burning building to save your life because you only have your underwear on and it'll be embarrassing. Or worrying about getting your clothes wet if there's someone drowning you need to jump in and save.

A bad review is so unimportant in the grand scheme of things. Sure, let little things go if you sense that talking to a guest about it will lead them to leave a bad review, but for more important transgressions, hosts need to not be afraid to speak up. 

It works the other way, too. Guests who are good people with good intentions would much rather a host talked to them about an issue than keep silent and leave them a bad review. I had a guest who had gotten a bad review from a host who said she had overused the kitchen. 

It was a home share, and the host offered full kitchen use. My guest, who liked to prepare her own healthy meals, said she and her boyfriend had cooked breakfast and dinner daily at this place and were otherwise out and about all day. She said if the host was feeling that they were taking over the kitchen at mealtimes, and it was interfering with the host using her own kitchen, why didn't she just say something at the time? A kitchen schedule could easily have been worked out, with no offense to the guest, who was used to home-shares, instead of saying nothing and slamming her in the review.

[Felix-Lam0]

@Pat271 I enjoyed reading your reply and I would like to know how would you act in my current hop jumping with Airbnb and a guest. 

For some context, we do not live in the same house as the guest and we had agreed to provide full refund for nights he did not stayed from the day he made the complain, he has rejected them all.

The guest checked in on 16 Dec and made a complain about moulding on 18 Dec which made him ineligible for cancellation and relocation per Airbnb policy (Our own policy is that if guest are unhappy about the property and wish to leave after check-in then we still provide full refund for nights not stayed). We wanted to identify the issue so we requested pictures from the guest and Airbnb, the guest did not respond and the first agent responded with an automatic response. 

Being proactive, we approach the guest in-person to solve the issue and ask him to show us where the moulding is, he has instead shown as a small crack in the wall. We explained to him that we only discovered the issue on 16 Dec after the previous guest has left and it already has a coat of paint, more will be required at a later date. He was satisfied with the explanation and when asked, did not mention any further issue. In fact he was puzzled about a moulding complain, so we thought this was a misunderstanding and ask Airbnb to close the complain.

Forward 3 days, Airbnb has said the guest has contact them about spider in the bathroom(We leave the window open for ventilation and spiders are common because of the season) and hair in the room, usually we would have offered another clean, but we had carried out the cleaning this time ourselves rather than the cleaner and we had already approached him earlier and he did not mention anything about the spider and hair. This is extremely unusual for a guest to refuse to identify the issue and later to still provide images to Airbnb.

Now it is the 24 Dec, we have spoken to 6+ Airbnb agents who all seems to be unable to resolve this issue and allows this to be dragged on or only be able to inform us that the guest has refused the altercation request, so the guest is unhappy about the place, refusing to speak to Airbnb or us and refusing to leave with refund for nights not stayed. One Airbnb agent even threaten us that do we want to just cancel reservation from our end so we can end this complain and the guest to leave with full refund, thereby allows the guest to stay for free for more than a week. We certainly do not want to give in to this guest's demand after how uncooperative the guest is, but we nevertheless gave the guest the option to leave immediately with partial refund for nights not stay. Airbnb while very slow to progress the case also failed to remain impartial by sticking to the pictures the guest supplied AFTER we spoke to him in person and well into his reservation, they disregarded our attempts to assist the guest both in person and on Airbnb messaging.

I am aware my listing is not the cleanliest as it is a shared house and I can not clean the common areas daily when some guests leave dishes unwashed and living room a mess. We clean the spaces weekly and I think it is reasonable for us to ask the guest to maintain the house in a reasonable state, such as taking the dishes out of dish washer and clean up the pots they used.

Establishing a relationship with them only works both ways and most of our guests are enjoying our accommodation and they take care of the house and let us know if anything require maintenance. We have seen a fair share of demands, and we refund them for nights not stayed even if reasons can be unreasonable, since it is the best for both to move on. I am aware of hosts are provide full refund because they simply can not be troubled to be hoop jumping with Airbnb for the most ridiculous reasons, but for us, we stop at full refunds for nights not stay, since many of our properties has been targeted by Airbnb tyrants who targets Asian hosts for free stays. We have a blacklist among ourselves to look out for these individual as Airbnb rarely takes action against them as guest behaviours especially fabricating complains are hard to verify.

How would deal with the guest currently staying? He has so far not respond to any of our offer to remedy the issue and Airbnb as it stands are leaning towards the pictures of hair and spiders that he produced after we visited him in person. However the guest is also refusing to leave when we made altercation request and seems to be dragging out the complain until his stay ends.

[Sarah977]

@Felix-Lam0 "I am aware my listing is not the cleanliest as it is a shared house and I can not clean the common areas daily when some guests leave dishes unwashed and living room a mess. We clean the spaces weekly and I think it is reasonable for us to ask the guest to maintain the house in a reasonable state"

I'm sorry, but this just isn't acceptable. If you are going to rent out multiple rooms in a house to unrelated guests, it is your responsibility to clean the common areas on a daily basis. It isn't acceptable for the clean guests to have to suffer with dirty kitchens and bathrooms left by other disrespectful guests.

You either need to hire someone to go in and clean the common areas daily, or maybe think about an arrangement where one of the bedrooms is rented long term for a reduced rent in exchange for daily cleaning.