**** VERY VERY HELPFUL ADVICE TO ALL HOSTS ****

[Momi0]

Dear Community Hosts,

My name is Momi.  I am Superhost in Hawaii.  Native Hawaiian, Business Owner, Wife, Mother and Airbnb Host Mentor.

I have been a Superhost for 12 months in a row with 94% OVERALL experience of 5 Star ratings in ALL categories with 47 reviews.   I take such great pride/joy in hosting and being the example of what a Superhost truly is....and its not just about Cleanliness, or Response time....I'm the host who comes to the airport at midnight to pick up guests with fresh flower lies that I paid for at no cost to the Airbnb guests, I'm the host who prepares a meal at midnight when a couple arrives because they were delayed for 8 hours, arrived hungry, with no bags, giving them clothes from my closet and my husbands closest so they can wear something clean to bed and the next day, then rearranged my schedule  the next morning to take them shopping for clothes and shoes, pack lunches for long airport rides, drive guests to the ER, etc.....WE all do things like that......but here's why I am writing today.

I received a request for my home from ANOTHER Airbnb host (of 6 months) who resides in Bay Shore, New York, who started out her long message "telling me" what she needed from me, and how she was so exhausted from so much research that she now wanted me to answer all of her questions to see if WE fit HER needs.  But did spend a quick second saying our home looked perfect but was unsure about the location.  (FYI - I live in the best neighbhood in all of Oahu). This message request said nothing about what kind of guests they would be.  I immediately wrote back and thanked her graciously for choosing our home, wished her congrats on her 11 good reviews, welcomed her to Airbnb, complimented her and husband smiles in the photos, etc  and that I would be happy to answer ALL of her many questions about Hawaii activities, excursions, etc ONCE she was booked but I needed her to do something for me first.  When I kindly explained that she needed to go back to our listing and follow the instructions that are laid out for EVERY guests, and read to see what she missed, and once I received it, I would be happy to approve her and would welcome her with lots of Superhost Service and Aloha Spirit.   (90% of my booking requests have received the same message from me because they missed it too, 100% percent of those requests respond with a sweet humbling apology and thank me for my patience in giving them a 2nd chance)

Here's how THIS HOST chose to respond:

She actually wrote back verbatim;  "yeah, I read it, but I didn't think you were serious! I would NEVER write such a RUDE message to any guests and I have those good reviews for a reasons. Wow!"

I chose to Decline her based on just that one reply because instead of offering up an apology for missing the part that WE needed regarding OUR House Rules, she chose to be sarcastic and rude.  I chose to not reply back either. Not worth my energy or time.  Did it end there?  Absolutely not! 

What did she do after getting DECLINED?  She chose to "Attack" in a vicious personal way that its now been escalated to a Case Manager with Airbnb.  Airbnb contacted me and thanked me for not replying to her, and confirmed that my messages were in no way rude but gracious and kind.  They told me she was 100% in the wrong as my listing is very clear in what we expect from potential guests before allowing them to book.  And they would be contacting her immediately over this behavior.  Its not acceptable.

Seems my instincts about her were correct. Glad I declined.  Who does that?!?!!?  

And 5 minutes later, I received another booking from a NEW person to Airbnb, who missed the exact same thing the host did, but instead of attacking me, he wrote back the most beautiful humble apology and thanked me for approving him after I wrote him to remind him to go back and read my listing to see what he missed.  Seems he knows more about the Airbnb community then the lady who is hosting on this platform.  I thanked him 100xs over for this beautiful reply and accepted his booking immediately.  The funny thing is, it was for the same EXACT days that she had requested an hour earlier.  One door closes, God opens a better looking door.

I share this with all of you because I want everyone to understand that EVERY host is different. EVERY home is different. EVERY family is different, EVERY expectation of guests behavior is different, but what is NOT different, is being respectful to each other.  I was in no way disrespectful to her yet she chose to attack me in such an ugly way that it truly did upset me.  I am mother to a beautiful young girl.  My child has witnessed the most horrible behavior from a guests in 2015  who was caught smoking in our home when we first started hosting in 2015. (he promised us he wouldnt' smoke again, but did,  and was kicked out the next day by Airbnb and us)

 I will do everything to protect her.  And if that means, that guests need to start their booking request message with a "cute funny quote" from our family's fav movie Willie Wonka and Chocolate Factory to ensure they have read our HOUSE RULES, then so be it!  That's my right.  I will not apologize for it either.  As a matter of fact, I have been held up by other hosts, other guests, other hosting companies, INCLUDING Airbnb for this "genius" way of seeing who actually READS our listing and House Rules. Other hosts have even "borrowed" the idea from me to ensure their guests read their rules & listing.  (For those who don't know this, its called the "Van Halen Rule"  Van Halen included a clause hidden in their stage set up contacts to ensure 100% safety, it read:  " ONLY BROWN M & M's IN OUR GREEEN ROOM"  (if the BROWN M & M's were not in the green room, the stage set up company was ordered to start all over for safety reasons!"

After reading the community wall for over a year, I think it might help to serve even more hosts if you were to include this idea into your listing and house rules.  There are hosts in Hawaii whose rules include "No Showers after 9:30pm due to noise", parking rules, vistors rules, etc and most of their reviews state that the guests broke this Shower rule over and over.  And the guests wrote saying they had upset the host by bringing an unapproved guests to stay at their listing".

The point in my post today is " TAKE THE TIME TO READ THE HOST ENTIRE LISTING and RULES!  Its that simple.  Its also respectful.

Thank you & Mahalo for allowing me to share my feelings, my heart and my advice.  Wishing you all the best.....and hope to host another host again soon.  Ive hosted 3 Airbnb Superhosts now in 2016....and every single one of them said...."Momi, you take Superhost service to a whole new level, wow!" 

Momi

Superhost in Hawaii

5 Star Airbnb Traveling Guest 

p.s.  and yes, deep down inside, I am hoping that SHE (FYI - is not a Superhost)  sees this post and decides to apologize for her truly appalling  behavior! And I would gladly accept it.  But she still won't be staying in our home, unless I sell it first.  😉

[Gail32]

Hello Momi: I enjoyed reading your comments...............I can see why you are a Super Host.......you go the extra mile to make your guests feel welcome.

Most of us take hosting seriously..............my last guest forgot her credit card so I used mine to help her rent a car......she now has her card and has applied it to the car rental company.......................

I felt I could trust her.

Learning a few new things each time someone stays with me.

Cheers............Gail

[Andrea9]

@Momi0

Great story Momi, and also how you handed it! 

I think the quick fame of hosting gets some to start growing out of their britches!

[Momi0]

britches or BI**CHES?  LOL  - sorry couldn't resist.  @Andrea9  (your post made me laugh....needed that!)

[Andrea9]

@Momi0

Always a pleasure to create laughter! I did mean britches, that lovely funny old-fashioned expression that's always made me think baggy, wide, suspender-held. And if you grow out of those, it's really serious! 😉

[Momi0]

@Andrea9 @Gail32 @Gladys5 @Sandra126 @Genya0 @Eloise0 

Your replies and support mean everything to me.  I am honored that you took the time to read my post. And more so for taking even more time to write your replies.   And @DavidandFiona  are correct, its OUR house, OUR rules.  And the 2 Airbnb places that I stayed at in 2016, I was very respectful of both hosts and even cleaned their entire house before my family and I left.  One Superhost wrote in  his reviews with caps that I was the 'CLEANIEST GUESTS" he has ever hosted, which we should all be striving for. 

I'm thrilled to know that I have also helped some new hosts with my post as well.  (love that you get answers back on your CD questions, I can't wait for the day I tell you my answer too 🙂

Have a great Labor Day weekend, may you all be blessed with wonderful guests, and also some quiet down time...haha....me, I'm headed to the beach with my current Airbnb AWESOME guests who are moving to Hawaii right now, (with help from me for the last 4 months).

At breakfast time today, I taught them how to pronouce some very necessary Hawaiian words...just love their heart for learning. 

Aloha, 

Momi

Superhost

#LiveAloha

[Gail32]

Hi Momi: Thank you for the Labor Day wishes................

So nice of you to help those folks move to Hawaii.................................

Have fun at the beach ..............................we're off to see Pat Benetar at the PNE in Vancouver BC tonight.

Cheers........Gail 🙂

[Andrea9]

Thanks @Momi0 and CLEANIEST guests are the absolute bestest.

If I ever manage getting to Hawai I'll be sure to check out if your listing is available!

[Susan151]

Clearly, AirBNB has not inflicted Instant Booking on you. Some of us do not have the luxury of asking cute questions within our listing. Nope. We are part of a select group that have no options, but instead, must allow anyone with just ONE recommendation into our homes. It must be nice!

I have not hosted a host yet, but "word on the street" is that they can be particularly difficult, especially if they think that only their way is the right one. The world is a big place, and as hosts, I like to believe that all of us are hosting in a way that we believe works within the realms of our own lives and values.

[David126]

Two suggestions, call them and see if they will remove it, relist as many times as needed to get one without it.

[Jude7]

My heart feels for you, @Susan151, about not having an option to turn off Instant Book.  Although I don't have any cute questions as part of my booking process, I have thoroughly enjoyed the connection I have developed with each guest before approving them, a connection that has extended into and through each booking.

But I also wanted to comment, Susan, about your statement about other hosts being difficult guests.  I was surprised that you mentioned this, because looking back at my summer's worth of guests, the two most difficult were both Superhosts, and were the only two who left me less than a 5 star review.

I wonder why that is? 

Jude

[Susan151]

@Jude7 So you have confirmed what I have heard! Hosts are difficult as guests, and superhosts are even worse! I think it might be human nature to think that our systems are the best, and when a fellow host falls "short" by those standards, even though they might be different standards, folks that do the same thing are quick to pounce.

I have been extremely lucky so far. I have found something to enjoy about every single one of our guests. The two sets of guests that I enjoyed the least were both Instant Booking guests. Without that pre-booking exploration, we didn't have the same connection at the beginning of their visits.

I think that this experiment is flawed, especially for a shared space. I should have more control over who is sleeping in the next bedroom. I will pull my listing the minute I feel that my family's safety is in jeopardy.

[Jude7]

I've been having such a delightful experience as a host, that I'm thinking of expanding to including a room in my home.  Currently I'm renting a luxurious camper located at the far end of my property, away from my line of sight.  But if I'm forced to use Instant Book when I create this new listing, I would be forced to cancel those plans, as having the ability to properly screen my guests is non-negotiable to me.  Hear that, Airbnb?  

Such an intersting phenomena - the human reaction some hosts may  have when being guests.  I felt as you described, @Susan, that both of these guests felt as if I needed to be humbled for not meeting some standard they had set, whereas every  other guest has been completely charmed and appreciating of what I offer, and the care I extend to making sure each experience is a positive one.

I know how important those 5 star ratings are to each host, especially  those hosts who go out of their way to try and create something special for each guest.  I would hope that when I am a guest, I will retain the same sensitivity that guests have shown to me.

Jude

[Momi0]

@Susan151  Hi Susan...thank you for contributing to my thread.  I wanted to let you know that any guests who uses INSTANT Booking through MY listing still has to comply with my required "prerequisite" of who stays in our home and I can also assure you that I DO have an ongoing conversation with these individuals to ensure they are THE right fit.  Just because another host gave them a 5 Star review, does not mean they will be a right fit for OUR home/family.  Some of these guests have not booked a "private room" in a family house before but only  "entire apt or studio" ( I do my research on everything and everyone).   I start out my initial personal message to them by thanking them for using Instant booking, and compliment them on having their great review. BUT I am also very quick to let them know that we would only be hosting someone that is the right FIT for our family.   Instant Bookings only mean to me that they can secure the dates without waiting on me, but I can assure you, there is alot more that goes into that booking in getting to know them so we all feel excited about hosting them prior to their arrival.  If any guests doesn't take the time to follow my IB AUTO message (that I know they received) and/or reply to my introdutory message, letting me know what my listing says I need to know, you can bet I will be calling Airbnb to say ""No Thanks!"  (only happened once)

My type of guests reads.....and appreciates.  🙂

[Alice-and-Jeff0]

@Susan151 -  this is absolutely NOT true.  If you put the Van Halen question in the House Rules, when the guests fail to provide an answer they are IN VIOLATION of your House Rules and that is grounds to cancel their reservation - without penalty!  You need to read about what your rights are as a host.  

https://www.airbnb.com/help/article/990/how-do-host-cancellation-penalties-work

And as a Superhost, I take exception to the preconceived notion and bias you have toward us.  We are not more difficult but we are likely to be more careful in our selection of a host home because, frankly, we know how painful it can be to stay with someone who is not a good fit.  You've only been hosting for a few months, it's hard to believe that you've been able to gleen enough information from your 17 guest stays to draw the line at all Superhosts especially since you haven't hosted a single one of us yet. 

[Susan151]

@Alice-and-Jeff0Of course, I have read that page of the FAQ's, along with a bunch of other ones, however, I can not find mention of "House Rules" anywhere on that specific page. Would you be willing to copy/paste what you have found at that URL?