New to Hosting - Guest Bidet Spray

[Cheryl863]

Hi All, 

I'm new to hosting and had a great first guest experience. 

Generally as I tend to see people as an extension of myself I'm quite upset and am unsure as to how to deal with the second guest. 

In a nutshell, every need has been accommodated and the booking was made only after a video call to show her the bedroom and bathroom. I offered to do so myself because from her repeated requests I felt that perhaps she had some doubts as to the fact that my home was super clean and cozy. There are no photos of my bedroom and bathroom so a video call enabled her to get the necessary assurances. 

Cleanliness is my biggest pet peeve 🙂 and I value this above all else. 

All toiletries were made available other than a towel as I cannot understand how recycling a brand new towel used by someone can be okay to hand over to the next guest. This has been communicated already so anyone who books and/or wishes to book can see this. 

Although I do not allow guests to cook at home; I was happy to allow the second guest to do so as she had apparently discussed this with husband and asked if she could buy things to cook her own breakfast. So I said okay. I offered to buy her the groceries provided that she pays and she told me of her requirements. A screenshot of the bill was sent to her prior to her arrival. No mention of this was made on her first day because I assumed that she would mention her intention to pay herself. 

I offered to collect her as her colleagues were not able to do so on account of their work hours and would have been happy to do so. She arrived home safely. After ensuring she had all that she needed; I explained that the AC could not be left running for more than 5 hours at a stretch. She agreed. Also explained that the cleaning lady needs access to the room in the morning. She agreed. 

Showed her where the water was. She even commented that I used only bottled water and I said yes. That is true. It is the most expensive option. But this is exactly what has been used in our home since my Nan built this house. 

Walked with her to make sure she got her autorickshaw in time to go to work. 

Her work hours were also accepted by me 3-12pm. 

When she returns home past midnight she tells me of her day etc. It was all fine.

However later, she starts saying that I need to get something done about the bidet toilet spray and I explained that I do not like to keep one. I cannot imagine again (like the towel); how something like a toilet spray can be used by several people. She said she wasn't used to using a toilet roll just as is. And that she was going to get a plant spray to use. It just disturbed me for 3 hours and I couldn't sleep imagining how she would use this plant spray. 

She further went on to say that it would "help other guests" to have a bidet toilet spray and I explained that I would not have it in my house. We've just been raised using a toilet roll. She went on and on about this and then carried on to say how come no one else has "complained". 

That comment really made me feel that my home was not okay.

My own cleaner tells me repeatedly how clean my home is in comparison to the other homes she has cleaned all of her years.

I take pride in keeping a super clean home and her comments made me feel like she was looking to fault find. 

Everyone who comes home thinks its brand new because of the way the house has been maintained but here for the first time; I'm not sure as to whether I should request AirBnB to help her find another place to stay as I feel like an outsider in my own home. 

The AC has been kept running for 11 hours straight and earlier on in the day for 2 hours and I find it unacceptable.  

I just had to call her on the mobile to let the cleaning lady into her room. 

I wrote to AirBnB support and didn't get any response. 

If there is anyone who can write to me I would appreciate knowing what else I could have possibly done. 

In a few minutes I will be calling her on the phone as I need to clear 

1- verification (to be completed)

2- AC to be switched off after 5 hours as opposed to 13 hours of a continuous run

3- the door to be left unlocked for the cleaner in the morning

4- grocery bill (feel so embarrassed to ask - I would not hold on to payment)

Thank you in advance. 

Kind regards

Cheryl  

[Anonymous]

@Cheryl863  Oh, where to begin.

First and foremost, other guests are not "extensions of yourself," and it's not helpful to regard them that way. They are completely separate people, and their needs and feelings are quite different from yours. Your home and hospitality may be perfect for some people but unsuitable for others, which is why it's so important that your listing is very clear about what you offer.

And that is why I'm so confused by what you choose to highlight in your listing. I see some bizarrely abstract close-up photos of a window, a key, and a door handle, and what looks like a tiny portion of an uncovered mattress, but none of these have anything to do with what guests need to know about the space they're booking.  People want to see the whole room they're renting, including the (whole) bed, how the room is laid out, how much space there is to move around, and what other amenities (including clothes storage and lighting) are provided. They want to see the whole bathroom - not just a bar of soap on the windowsill.  They shouldn't have to ask you for a video tour; it shouldn't be necessary because you should have already shown it as clearly as possible. 

You don't have to install a bidet spray if you don't want to, but guests can only make an informed decision about whether your home has the features they want if you actually show them in your listing. 

As for the towels...wow, just wow. This might be the strangest thing I've ever heard. Of course you can reuse towels between guests by washing them. In the laundry. Do you think hotels throw all the towels into the garbage every time a guest leaves? It's not practical for guests to travel with towels and bedding - they take up too much space in baggage - so it's really one of the fundamental things to provide. Washing linens and towels to sanitize them for the next guest is something you're going to have to change your point of view about if you intend to continue hosting. Once again, you don't have to install a bidet spray, but it's certainly possible to sanitize the contact end to make it hygienic for multiple people to use.

It sounds like neither you nor the current guest is happy with the stay, so I recommend that you reach an agreement to change the booking to an earlier checkout and refund the unused nights. Then, take your listing offline for awhile so you can either make some major changes (complete descriptions, photos of the whole rooms, etc) or do some soul-searching about whether hosting in the home is truly right for you.