Dilemma to review and to be reviewed

[Alice595]

EI just checked out a family today. They were nice, and respected house rules. They even collected kitchen trash and put the bags away outside the house in the backyard even though we did not require guests to do so.

However, we did find a few small things. (1) Their kids put bubble gums on the hand towel in the bathroom. The hand towel had to be trashed (2) The lady was at period and left blood stains on the sheet even though she tried to clean it without success. (3) A coffee cup which has a set of four was missing, most likely it was broken by kids. They did not tell me these during their stay.

Should I send a message to them? Should I just take the cost of damages without telling them? How and what should I review them? I am so afraid of getting a retaliatory review if I send a message to them and mention the damages.

Just four days ago, I got a retaliatory review from a guest who canceled one hour after checkin because he said to Airbnb the house was too hot while the temperature on thermostat showed 71 F. So far I have not written my review to him. Therefore his review is not shown yet. Definitely it would be 1 star based on his rough messages after Airbnb told him that I agreed to refund him unused night instead of a full refund.

[Paul154]

@Alice595 

You're missing a crucial step before you start stressing about writing a bad review.

Kindly ask them for damages. A modest $10-$20.

Plates are cheap at thrift stores and the linens and hand towels were not brand new.

Make your request neutral, in a way so  guests don't become defensive.

Sometimes guests do the right thing. 

[Anonymous]

@Paul154  $10-$20 seems like an awfully small amount to go through the Resolution process for - especially when the items in question are ones that any accommodation provider would expect to be subject to wear n'tear, stain maintenance, and routine replacement.

A hotel wouldn't charge a guest for a soiled sheet or towel. A cafe wouldn't charge for a broken mug. They know that would be petty and terrible for business.

[Paul154]

Yes Andrew,

That is the point. 

If one does not care enough to ask for damages, then the damages are not that important.

[Alice595]

@Paul154  I still have a lot to learn from you and other experienced hosts here.

[Paul154]

@Alice595 

You got that badge. I need to learn from YOU!

[Alice595]

@Anonymousand @Helen350  Thanks for your feedback. I have not thought of making a claim for blood stains due to period. Actually I had a couple of cases already when guests left stains on the sheet, which I did not make claim. One was a soft drink spill and the other was a blood stain.

But in those two cases, one guest told me and said sorry about incidence while the other one did not tell me. The guest who told me about it left me a 5 star review. The guest who did not tell me and I did not message her about the stain either. But I got a 4 star overall and a 4 star in the accuracy and 4 star in value from the this guest. The message she left about the accuracy was that the bedding looks differently from the photos shown on the listing. Do I have to use the same bedding with the same color and style all the time?

This past experience made me to wonder if guests who hides things could potentially be fussy. I will wait and see what happen this time. For the time being, I think that I will till the last day to write my review according to the suggestion from @Robin4

[Helen350]

@Alice595 

1) I don't think I would penalise a guest for not saying sorry, tho' of course it's much appreciated when they do.

2) I don't think you should write your review based on what you THINK they will say. Sounds a bit retaliatory! And Ungracious.

3) I see no rationale for assuming the guest who covered up the minor damage will give you 4* (Who knows, their shame & embarrassment may guilt them into giving you 5* by way of compensation?)

4) I agree @Robin4 's wording is a diplomatic way of wording they could have been cleaner - if you think the issue was significant enough to comment on. Plus maybe a polite PRIVATE note (which won't elicit a bad retaliatory review from them cos they won't see yours till they've done theirs.)

[Sarah977]

@Alice595  I agree with others that those 3 things you mentioned are just the cost of doing business, altho I do understand your point about how it would be nice if guests mentioned things they have damaged. A few guests will fess up to stuff, but I think the majority won't.

Maybe in the future, either ask here on the forum how to deal with things like stains and bubble gum, or look online for fixes for those things before assuming the things are ruined and need to be thrown out. (Andrew gave you a workable solution for the bubble gum, and it's quite possible that the mom wasn't even aware that her kid had done that). 

As far as a cup of a set being broken, I wouldn't use "sets" of things in an Airbnb. Either make the dishes an eclectic mix (which you can do without it looking like a hodge-podge- my dishes are just solid colors, about 6 different ones, so I can always find something that "matches"), or use dishes that you can easily match like plain white from Ikea or something else that is always available to buy by the piece.

[Alice595]

@Sarah977  Thanks for your understanding and good and practical suggestions.

One side of the hand towel was almost fully covered by bubble gum spilled out of the mouth. It was very disgusting. And the sheet was stained in a few places. The cleaner showed me pictures of both. I definitely would not have them cleaned and reuse them for other guests. 

[Elle85]

For our most recent stay we were charged over $100 because my child scratched his leg bloody and there were blood stains on the kids’ sheet and, apparently, the kids stained the carpet in the dining area ( I was not aware!) , with something, I am assuming food

[Dimitar27]

Cups and towels do not live long anyway.  Bed sheets too.  If they survive 3-4 months-you are OK. If you are very busy, they will live even shorter.

[Sean433]

@Alice595 

Where was the retaliatory review from the guest you speak of? I saw one from June from a guy named John but interestingly you did not leave him a review.

[Alice595]

@Sean433  I left that group of guests a good review. After I saw their review, I called Airbnb and had my review removed.

The other retaliatory review was removed by Airbnb. That review was because the guest told Airbnb the house temperature was too high at 71F. I had another post about it.

In this particular case in this post, the guest actually did not leave me a review. I did not either and I did not file a claim and just took the loss. 

[Susan1188]

Chiming in with some things I've experienced:

- Guests will almost NEVER tell you about damage.  On the contrary they will hide it.  Even way more important stuff than you listed.

- Mom and Dad probably didn't know about the bubble gum in the towel.  Kids do stuff and hide it too!

- Poor lady was probably embarrassed about the blood, I would leave it.  If she saturated the sheets and did'nt say anything, that's another story.

- Just being realistic - do you really think if you charge them for those things they will leave you a good review?  In general, Airbnb host must choose between introducing a resolution request and his good review.  That's why people wait 13 days 12 hours and issue the review and request last minute.

- Retaliation post-review is a real thing.  Please be factual to warn other hosts but also be careful and tactful so as not to provoke the guest.  Recently saw a case where the guest wanted a refund, didn't get it, then ensued many harassing messages,  and finally reported the host to Airbnb accusing her of safety concerns including a GAS LEAK  - this all happened AFTER her stay and AFTER both reviews were posted -  and Aribnb cancelled future reservations due to the gas leak accusation.

=> Your review should be factual, short, neutral non emotional and non insulting, as a way to not provoke undue retaliation but at the same time  inform future hosts.  Of course you should not mention menstrual blood or similar. 

[Alice595]

@Susan1188  Is the gas leak case you mentioned posted in this forum?

It is hard to believe that it could happen after her stay and after both reviews were posted. Was the gas leak mentioned in the review?