Gift from guests - where have they gone?

Ben205
Level 10
Crewkerne, United Kingdom

Gift from guests - where have they gone?

When we started hosting a year ago, one of the first posts I read on here was a thread about crazy gifts guests had left their hosts. Gifts from guests? Sounds cool. And yes, we got plenty (mustard from Frankfurt, stroopwafels from Holland) and lovely cards to thank us.

 

But since Christmas, nothing! I'm not complaining, can't expect delicious regional specialities every visit. But I was wondering if this is indicative of a change in ABB guests? I'd like to think we're still giving the same good service (reviews suggest we are).

 

So, maybe it's a different type of traveller at this time of year? Or perhaps ABB guests have stopped feeling they need to show gratitude to their host for sharing their house (after all, they pay good money)?

 

What do you think?

45 Replies 45
Ben205
Level 10
Crewkerne, United Kingdom

I'm wondering if we've learned anything from this thread. Seems to me that some hosts are suggesting -

 

Gifts might be less common now than 1-2 years ago

Europeans might be more likely to leave some sort of 'thank you'

ABB guests might have a greater sense of entitlement beyond the original home-sharing ethos

Millenials might have their own rules about displaying gratitude

 

Or, none of the above!

Christina355
Level 7
Bradenton, FL

My impression is that people leave less gifts now, because Airbnb is more well known and seen more as a business. It used to be seen as hosts allowing guests into their home and now it's shifted to guests paying for a stay. Same exact thing, just a different view point now that the novelty of Airbnb has worn off on the consumers. As a host starting AFTER the novelty has already worn off, I think it's really strange to think a guest would/should leave a gift. 

 

I really dislike seeing the negative comments regarding millenials on here. I'm a millenial and the majority of my guests are millenials. Because my listing is for a camping experience, it definitely attracts younger people. I have received gifts from some guests and it came as a total shock and really made my day, but honestly the best thing is when someone leaves a really heartfelt review because that will in turn help my revenue in the long run (hopefully!). 

@Christina355   Sorry you felt hard done by re the comments on millenials. Generalizations are just that- generalizations, and are obviously not true all across the board. I have had absolutely wonderful millenials as guests, respectful, appreciative, clean and tidy. 

But it is true that that generation TENDS to have a sense of entitlement that previous generations didn't manifest. I think it has to do with your generation growing up in an age of permissive parenting, many times with 2 parents working outside the home, therefore wanting to spend the little bit of leisure time they had with their kids doing fun things, and not bothering to teach things like basic manners, somehow assuming that their kids would just get those things by osmosis, and buying their kids the latest gadgets, etc. to make up for not actually being around much, or being so exhausted when they were around that they didn't have the energy to enforce their kids doing regular chores and so on.  An age where ME is reinforced by branding such as "iphone", "ipad", "personal size" (bar of soap or whatever) and the self-esteem movement, which espouses always telling a kid "oh, you really tried", "great job", etc, etc, instead of demanding some kind of accountability, like "I can see you tried, but that's just not good enough, you'll have to try a little harder". 

The millenial generation also are the ones who seem to think it's perfectly okay to rent a place, then airbnb out rooms or the whole place without the landlord's permission. Then when the guests plug up the toilet or break the washing machine, they call the landlord and expect it to be fixed without mentioning that it was their illegal sub-letters who actually did the damage.

@Sarah977 What you described is oddly specific and the tone of your writing makes it sound like you are very resentful. 

 

The original point of this thread that I was responding to is that some hosts feel they should receive gifts from guests and I find that very strange. I am a millenial and I do not feel entitled to receive gifts from people that are paying to stay at my listing. Obviously that was a "thing" when Air started and some people became accustomed to it and now that the gift giving has fizzled out people are bummed. I think it's as simple as that- no reason to blame millenials. 

@Christina355    Resentful? Of what? I already said I have no expectation of gifts from guests. 

The tone of your writing makes it sound like you are resentful of millenials in general. 

They were just observations, @Christina355.  What you read into it has nothing to do with my feelings towards millenials.

Fred13
Level 10
Placencia, Belize

On gifts, and Ben, cool thread. Some people bring them, most don't. Always appreciated and never expected. Guests from Europe and Australia/New Zealand tend to bring the most.

 

On millenials, (including my own son & daughter) - they are YOUNG, their only 'sin'. That means they are not as well versed about life (comes with age), not yet been in business (dollars & sense), probably not yet be parents (teaches you to be unselfish), still have not had the nicer things in life and learned how to care of them (unless brilliant, lucky or born with a silver spoon), etc. etc. Today they are afforded more time to 'grow up' (I still haven't, heard was boring), than in the past. Most really are good kids, like we all were. (Well not me, I was a pain, wish I could take it back). 😉

    

Perhaps it's the age of guest that is currently staying with you?  Our guest age has steadily been getting older now that we're more established and it's these older guests, who know the difference between home sharing and cheap renting, are the gift/card givers. Perhaps it's the long-since lost idea of bringing a "hostess gift" when you go to a friend's home. Many younger folks think "bringing something" is to contribute to the common good of the group - food or booze to drink with pals - but there was a time when you would never show up empty-handed at a invitation without a little gift just for the hosts thanking them for going to all the work to have someone over. Just this last week we received jam, a bottle of wine and a pound of coffee from our travelers, all from guests over the age of 35.  

 

Here's some lovely articles about the "hostess gift": 

http://www.chicagonow.com/raising-world-citizens/2014/12/host-and-hostess-gifts-gift-giving-customs-...

http://emilypost.com/advice/should-i-bring-a-hostess-gift/

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/dana-holmes/hostess-gift-dos-donts_b_2193915.html

https://www.cntraveler.com/stories/2011-03-15/etiquette-101-what-gives

Huma0
Level 10
London, United Kingdom

Interesting topic.

 

My own experience is that I don't expect gifts from guests and the majority don't give me anything, but there are still a reasonably large number who do and this doesn't seem to have anything to do with their age.

 

However, I have noticed that Asian guests (particularly Chinese and Korean) are the most likely to bring gifts - some European guests do but Americans pretty much never do. I think that in many Asian cultures it is standard that you would bring a gift when visiting someone's home (I know that is the case in Pakistan, where I am originally from). It is not necessarily a sign of appreciation, as they have usually bought the gift prior to staying (often something 'typical' from their country), but is just considered good manners. The gifts have ranged from something small, like a box of tea, to expensive, like a very beautiful tea set.

 

Guests will more often leave thank you cards with a personalised message at the end of the stay if they want to show their appreciation. Most often, they choose cards with pictures of cats on them (I have three kitties, who are very popular with guests).

 

I haven't noticed a decline in gift/card giving, other than I have hosted less Asian guests lately than usual, and more Americans and Europeans (maybe since I switched to Instant Book?). Of these, only the Europeans have left gifts. Recently, some Italian girls bought me flowers, some Italian guys a boxed set of wine and a little book from Sardinina and an English mother and daughter very thoughtfully gave me a pretty guest book.

 

Before that, I used to display the thank you cards on a sideboard in the dining room, but I don't know if guests realised what they were or peeked inside of them and my cat was constantly knocking them over! Now, I have stuck the cards inside the guest book, which I leave with a pen on a table by the front door. I am finding that guests are leaving thank you messages in the book without being prompted, which is lovely.

 

I agree that behaving respectfully during their stay and leaving a good review are more important that giving the host a gift (and not all guests that have given gifts have done this). However, I do always appreciate it when I receive a gift or thank you card. I see it as a bonus, especially if you can see some thought went into it.

 

In conclusion, I don't think gift giving is declining, but it is sporadic. Asian guests most commonly bring gifts, followed by Europeans. Age seems to have nothing to do with it.

 

Lawrene0
Level 10
Florence, Canada

Three gift observations:

1. Someone in another thread wondered why Detroit (in Michigan, USA) got to host experiences when his town did not. I remember defending Detroit in that thread, and maybe it was purely mercenary - because of the nice gifts Detroiters and Windsorites have brought with them from Detroit. From experience, if you like honey or bread or salve or soap, I would say to approve all booking requests from Detroit. 

2. I never expect gifts, and it never crosses my mind to bring gifts when I am a guest. I am not at all a millennial, so no one can blame my parents. 

3. Young friends in wine country just listed their guesthouse, and I told them they needed to up their price. With that newbie discount, they were rock bottom for even a bedroom, and in for trouble. However, their first guest is wonderful and has given them a case of wine in appreciation for the low-cost digs. It's nice to be wrong.

 

Willow3
Level 10
Coupeville, WA

This American left a token (but cool and useful) gift for all five of her hosts on a recent trip. And I'm one of those angsty Gen Xers!

 

Seriously though, Airbnb hosting is a business.  Hostess gifts are great - but don't actually apply to Airbnb I don't think.  Once money exchanges hands, the expectation of a gift is gone.  

 

And again, I will happily trade most of my Boomers for everyone elses' Millennials.  

@Ben205

 

Only once and all I saw was the bag, I am a beer person and am quite happy to be left some decent beer, recently was left a few cans of something I did not know but was told it was crap. 

 

I have a fridge in the common areas and often there are cans or bottles left.

 

I used to get tips, cash, but much less common now.

David
Renee-Claude1
Level 1
Brighton, Canada

I do want to bring a gift to my hosts and was wondering what hosts like to receive? Food? Magnet? Small art? Anything else? (I live in Canada if that helps).

I’m a first time guest.  We’ve rented an attached apartment for 3 months over the summer of 2023.  I I have no idea what to bring as a hostess gift. And make any suggestions?