Guest wants refund and claims racism...

[Marissa160]

I posted this issue in the hosting forum but switched to this one so it’s more private. Long story short, had a guest throw a party at my cabin this weekend and invited 20-30 people in my 10 person max cabin. I evicted them the next morning and have learned some red flags and better practices to employ in the future. 

The guest sent me a resolution request asking for half of their money back since they didn’t get to stay the night. They accused the neighbors of racial profiling! It wasn’t at all that these guests had 30 people in my small home, and kept my neighbors up until midnight! 

The guests are local (red flag) and had so many people at my home. My husband believes we should refund some money to avoid retaliation and them coming back to damage the home.  What do you all think? Should I fear that and just give her some money back? They did leave the house in decent condition, some minor issues (broken window blind and a small amount of feces on the carpet-likely from a small child or pet), but I can live with them. Would love other hosts advice!!

[Marissa160]

@Anonymous  Completely agree which is why I followed up once I got the review. I am not sure there is a thing I can say to make it better! I do agree with you though, that in a way, her review might help me. Any guest that plans to have a party at my place will see her review and know I don’t play games when it comes to that. I am all for people having fun and guests can see that from the amenities I provide. However STARTING your party at 10 pm at a non-event venue is just rude anywhere. 

[Colleen253]

@Marissa160  You might respond publicly to that review simply with “Yes, please don’t book our ‘no parties’ listing if you intend to throw a 30 person party. Our rules are simple”. The review is long and rambling and a short response would bring all into sharp focus. 

[Sarah977]

@Anonymous  I agree that a guest disrespecting house rules and feeling they were discriminated against are not necessarily mutually exclusive situations. 

It's the way the guest wrote about the whole situation that would make me disbelieve the racism allegation. 

She doesn't acknowledge at all that inviting an extra 14 people over was a flagrant disregard for the max guest count, instead she sounds like she feels she was entitled to do so and the only reason they were booted out was because of race.

If she had acknowledged that she was ignoring the max guest count and had no right to throw this party, or fellowship, as she calls it, and then also said she felt some racial discrimination from the HOA rep, or neighbors, that is something I wouldn't view as illegitimate.

[Anonymous]

@Sarah977  Since the guest openly stated that she had an extra 14 people over, I actually believe for real that she didn't think there was anything wrong with that. And of course I disagree with her from a host's perspective, but unfortunately this is what things have come to with Airbnb - it's a mainstream product now, and a vast swathe of popular culture thinks renting an Airbnb house means that for a night or two you can do whatever you want with as many people as you please in a bigger house than you can afford to have as your own. 

As you know, I think this is a terrible notion, and I also think Airbnb's "party prevention" press releases have given the Frat Boy Wink to people who have this mentality. Like, "seriously guys, we're totally against this - just, like, don't get caught bro."

I would assume that the guest was intentionally deceptive about her intentions for the home, since she didn't inform the host about plans to invite a huge group over when obviously that was the plan. I don't think this person was totally on the up and up, and I think the OP did a fantastic job with leaving an appropriate review. And at the same time, I wouldn't be surprised if there were white neighbors who had legitimate grievances with the party that got a little extra racialized with their response to it. Come on, it's freaking Texas. From my point of view, everyone is a little wrong here, but life's messy that way.  

For a different analogy - the MeToo movement has exposed a lot of abusive treatment of women in the workplace that needed to be exposed. Some of the victims of this abuse also turned out to be imperfect people who screwed up in other ways of their own, like we all do, which doesn't make their claims any less valid. The kind of people who use those flaws to accuse the accusers of being liars...well, that would be the defense teams of Epstein, Cosby, Weinstein, etc.  Not a side I would want to be on. So unless there unequivocal evidence that the guest is fabricating claims of discrimination, that is a topic you won't come out looking good by wading into.

You and I both often say, in reference to reviews: just the facts. Stay objective. Making assumptions about someone else's motivations is the opposite of that advice.

[Marissa160]

@Anonymous Extremely well said! I agree that I don’t believe the guest thinks she did anything wrong by having the party. I also know that I should have been more firm with her when I realized  she let 15 people show up to “look at the house”. I honestly didn’t want to ruin her stay and barrage her with questions when she had just arrived. I now know, I can’t be that nice and I must firmly and clearly re-state the rules. 

[Mark116]

@Marissa160  I am always extra careful with guests who are local, so I don't blame you. 

We're talking about 1 night only, right?  Just be clear, they can still leave a bad review, whether you refund them anything or not.  If you do refund, I would deduct the cost of the blind and of steam cleaning the rug from any refund.

If it makes financial sense, having someone, one of the cleaners or finding a 'co-host' meet guests when they arrive would be a big help.  I believe it establishes more of a sense that this a real person's home, and obviously, if people showed up with extra people that would be obvious.

We now have a lot of rules because we added rules as time went on and people did things we hadn't anticipated.  So, we have the rule that only registered guests are allowed on the property without advance consent, we have that furniture can't be moved, we have no eating in the bedrooms....it doesn't necessarily prevent anyone from doing these things, but it protects the host to have such rules on the books, if that makes sense. 

[Marissa160]

@Mark116  Yes, they only stayed one night as I asked them to leave the next morning. I just beefed up my listing with some additional rules and notes that I’m hoping will help. I’m honestly not even worried about a revenge review, I don’t want to be held hostage based on that. I am more worried about them coming back out of spite if I don’t give them some money back. In fact, the guest called me last night at 9 pm to ask me to meet her and give her back an bottle of liquor she says she left there! When I declined since it was so late, she insisted on meeting my cleaning staff to retrieve it which I declined again since it’s Memorial Day and I wanted to respect the cleaning staff’s time. 

[Mark116]

@Marissa160  Good grief.  Did they at least apologize for having an illegal party at your cabin?  That's a lot of nerve to be demanding anything after breaking a bunch of rules. 

Do you have any exterior cameras?  You might want to consider adding some outside trained on the driveway, but make sure they are disclosed and described very clearly in the listing.  

[Marissa160]

@Mark116 they haven’t taken any responsibility at all. They said they rented it to socialize and were stereotyped by the neighbors. I am working on trying to figure out access to a camera via a hotspot. I’m hopeful I’m successful this week after this incident! 

[Mark116]

@Marissa160  I would very nicely explain to them that when renting an Airbnb it is important to read the rules and the listing details, and that if they had done that they would have realized they could not have a 'socializing' event with extra people there.

I would [probably] also tell them that the neighbors contacted you for this reason and this reason only....more than 3 times the allowable number of guests.  You could also tell them that Airbnb is very concerned with these types of illegal gatherings and that if they use Airbnb in future they will need to pay more attention.

Or,  you could not bother trying to educate someone who doesn't care to be educated and who feels that rules do not apply to them.  

**I would also profusely thank the neighbors and maybe bring them a gift basket, because that is EXACTLY what you want them to do if they sense trouble.

[Laura2592]

@Mark116 yes I said that in the other thread. Wine. Gift cards. Whatever. You need good neighbors to be a remote host. They don't get paid to put up with poor guests. 

[Sarah977]

@Marissa160  Gotta love how she characterizes 14 extra people showing up to party as "they came to fellowship with us". Sounds so benign. Like an old folks church picnic.

And since when is "fellowship" a verb 🙂

[Lisa723]

@Marissa160 your cancellation policy is relevant only if the guest canceled the stay— not if you evicted them.

[Marissa160]

@Lisa723  thank you, I suspected this is the case. I guess I just let Airbnb refund them and decline her resolution request. It’s occurring to me that there is no incentive to a guest to be on good behavior. They can book up your place for a busy holiday weekend, throw a party, get thrown out and get most of their money back. Pretty good deal for a guest and the host is left dealing with the aftermath. I honestly don’t make enough money on my listing for all that LOL! 

[Skye72]

Stick to what you’re beliefs are. I don’t like the sound of you refunding money due to fear of their retaliation. Get a camera if you are worried about them coming back. They did the wrong thing they were evicted and why do you have to crawl back “ in case” they don’t like you anymore. Stand up or we will all have to follow suit! It is not ok  to let people treat us and our expensive cabins  with disrespect.

I support you to be in your power.