How do you approach the return of intimate items with guests?

[Laura2592]

We have had this happen a few times-- everything from lingerie to adult toys left behind. Any good verbiage that you can share?

I usually say "Thanks for staying with us. You left some items behind. Let me know if you would like us to get them back to you and we can work out mailing them." If the guest says "I didn't notice anything missing. What was it you found?" that is where I want to make sure I don't make anyone embarrassed or uncomfortable. 

What is the best way to approach? Blunt and factual? Euphemistic? 

[Colleen253]

@Laura2592 I avoid having to even deal with it at all by putting notices EVERYWHERE: “when packing up, please CHECK then DOUBLE CHECK you have ALL your belongings. Forgotten items will not be returned. 

Things  rarely get left behind.

It’s too much work otherwise, that I dont get paid for, messaging back and forth with the guest, packing the items, going to the post office, submitting resolution for reimbursement etc.

[Charles224]

@Laura2592 @Colleen253 , They have to chase you. Simple.

From my experience in 5 star hotels,  guests were NEVER contacted about 'lost-property'.

I'ts a good thing too.

The guest/s on the list may be different.. there are 100+ reasons for a private liason.. 

I suggest you just bag the items up for a month or so, and then dump them if you have had no contact from the guest. 

Yuck, it's all bin-worthy.

Cheers, Charles

[Emilia42]

@Charles224 That is true. At the hotel I used to work at it was the policy that we could not contact guests about lost items. Even if they left a wallet with $500 cash and multiple IDs + credit cards, we could not contact them. Privacy reason . . . 

[Kelly149]

@Laura2592 they've got to ask... otherwise it goes off to storage for a bit or straight to the rubbish

[Emiel1]

@Laura2592 

I think it is even more embarrasing for a guest to ask the host: did you found my *** ?

I would only contact the guest about things found which seems valuable (like juwelry, wallet) or important (glasses, artificial leg, false teeth, ESA....)

[Ann783]

I used to go out of my way to return forgotten items. Unless the guest alerts me, I throw it in the trash.

[Anonymous]

"Thank you so much for that thoughtful present you left us, my husband and I are really enjoying it!"

[Katrina79]

@Laura2592 I wouldn’t bother contacting any guest about lingerie or toys, it’s not my place. However, I recently had wonderful guests stay with two grandchildren that were about 18 months and four years old. Upon cleaning I found a tiny blue pill stamped V tucked under the bathroom vanity. I was instantly worried for the little one as the pill looks like candy. I decided I must reach out to the guest in case the children were in danger. I used vague wording,” Hi so n so I’m just at the house cleaning and found a small pill under the bathroom vanity. Do you or your husband take any medications and could your grand children have gotten into them?”. Her response came about half an hour later and thanked me for my concern. She said her husband has his medication and the grand children are well. 
I imagine if it is important enough to any host to reach out to a guest, finding the right words to use can be gracious. No host wants to embarrass a guest with crass language. 

[Nash-Cottages-LLC0]

@Laura2592 We reach out to the guest and let them know they've left an item behind and ask if they want us to send it to them. We do it gently as not to embarrass anyone and don't get specific. IF they want it returned, we do so. Most of the guests immediately offer to reimburse us for the cost of mailing the items to them. A few have been, well, less courteous. This is a note for off us: check the local laws in your area in handling left behind items. In some cases, even STRs are akin to hotels when any property has been left behind. You might have to, by law, keep it for 30 days and return it only if asked. 

[Laura2592]

@Nash-Cottages-LLC0 I just had a guest leave a shirt and a pair of (costume) earrings which I returned at their request. No offer to reimburse and I didn't ask. The guest then said the item was  taken from their porch. The guest asked why I didn't do signature confirmation! I said "Oh I had no idea that you would have preferred that. As a courtesy, I sent your items but did not upgrade any of the mailing services. I would have been happy to do so if you had let me know you were planning to reimburse us for the extra costs." Never heard from again 🙂

[Nash-Cottages-LLC0]

@Laura2592 -- wow, just wow. Great way to handle their comment. 

[Laura2592]

@Nash-Cottages-LLC0  yep. This has been a year of very interesting folks. I mean, its been a wild year in general. Looking forward to taking a break. We have the place to ourselves for a week in November and we blocked off Halloween and New Years to prevent any party temptation. It will be nice to just enjoy the space without worry. 

[Huma0]

I've never had those sort of items left behind. Well, yes some lingerie, but nothing 'racy'.

Initially, I used to contact guests if they left something behind and it seemed unintentional (guests often intentionally leave stuff behind because they have no room in their cases), e.g. forgotten under the bed, but not used underwear or socks etc. That would just go in the bin. I found that no one was ever bothered about getting the stuff back.

So, now I only message a guest if something was left behind, seemingly unintentionally, and it seemed like it might be of value, even if that's just sentimental value. It rarely happens now to be honest. I host long-termers and, if they leave stuff, it's usually intentionally. Not sure what I would do if I founds those types of 'intimate' items, but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't mention it, nor even hang onto them for a month. I really don't imagine most guests would ask for them back...

[Lawrene0]

Last thing left here was a pair of heavy rubber boots. I'm storing them for the guest, who says she "will just have to book again to come get them!"

Cool. 

That and a very old grey sleep shirt have been the most intimate things left here. 

Early on I had an unpleasant experience returning a guest's favourite band t-shirt to him. It was convoluted, he was ungrateful, and it was a stupid band. 🙂

Since then I leave the asking and the mailing/arranging plans to the forgetful guests.