Is a baby sitter/family member an extra guest?

[Sarah4001]

Hi all,

I have a couple and their two small children staying as guests. The wife has a sister that lives nearby. This is the second night now that the sister and her husband have been babysitting as mom and dad don’t get back in until late at night. last night I went to a concert tonight I don’t know where they went to…
Should I say anything? Charge them for 2 extra guests or should I just leave it alone?

[Gordon0]

Did the babysitter(s) sleep/stay the night, @Sarah4001? If no, I'd say you can't/shouldn't charge. As for allowing unauthorised guests in the house, that's a whole different ballgame.

[Sarah4001]

Gordon, Thank you for your take on this.

Yes, Mum & Dad had another “date night, the sister was the sitter again. It appears from the security cameras that she never left (cameras are only on the exterior).

Yet, she was seen coming out of the guest suite this am and hanging out as if it’s her home as well.

The problem with having disrespectful guests is, if you call them out on their bad behaviour, you are pretty much guaranteed a bad review yourself!

You can’t win can you…

[Brian2036]

@Sarah4001 

This begs the question, “Are guests’ hired help, such as baby sitters, nannies, or (God forbid) valets, lady’s maids or chauffeurs considered to be additional guests or are they similar to luggage?”

I say they are guests and should be identified and charged the appropriate fee.

In your case they are being left in charge of your house and you can be sure that they don’t intend to take responsibility for any damages that may occur on their watch.

 The “babysitter” excuse is a poor one. If they live nearby why can’t they babysit in their own house?

 I would guess that you can expect them to leave a nice mess behind for you.

[Sarah977]

@Sarah4001 "The problem with having disrespectful guests is, if you call them out on their bad behaviour, you are pretty much guaranteed a bad review yourself!"

There are various ways to approach things, some of which can trigger a bad review and some not.

"Calling them out on their bad behavior" is different from "Hi XX, It seems that you may not have understood that anyone else staying in a listing, without being listed on the reservation, or at least mentioned to the host to find out how they handle extra guests (some places charge an entire house fee, some charge extra over a base number, as I do) is required. My extra guest fee is XX, to cover the extra amenities used by more than XX number of guests, which is what my pricing is based on.

@Brian2036  When people have small children and are going to be out late, parents do not have the kids babysat elsewhere, having to wake them up and move them after they've been put to bed.

[Brian2036]

@Sarah977 

They don’t have to wake them up and move them. They can keep them at their house until the parents have dealt with their hangovers and come and get them.

Most likely the sister’s house is not nearly as comfortable as @Sarah4001

is providing, and of COURSE the children must always have the very best, particularly when someone else is paying.

This is just an excuse for bringing in non-paying guests.

The “You have to tolerate my behavior because you can’t inconvenience the dear little children” excuse nauseates me.

[Colleen253]

@Sarah4001 You don’t appear to address unregistered guests in your house rules. Update your listing to do that, and let this one go. Mention the unregistered guests in the review. 

[Sarah4001]

@Colleen253 Thank you for your reply and constructive criticism. I have updated my House Rules and have taken your suggestion "and let this one go".

Other than the babysitter/ sister being an extra guest for 2 out of 3 nights, they left the place just fine. And with family being in the area, it sounds like a high probability of a return visit next Spring.

Thanks again~

[Sarah977]

@Brian2036 "They don’t have to wake them up and move them. They can keep them at their house until the parents have dealt with their hangovers and come and get them."

Only someone who doesn't have children would propose this. Parents don't leave small children elsewhere for the night and pick them up in the morning. A 6 year old, sure, that's doable, a 2 year old, no. It has nothing  to do with "inconveniencing the little ones" . And why assume the parents are going out to get drunk?

The issue here is unauthorized, unpaid for people staying in the house, not your uninformed ideas about how to parent.

[Laura2592]

@Sarah4001 make sure as @Colleen253 said that you are VERY clear in the future. Unregistered guests will be charged or asked to leave. Insurance doesn't provide for them. Guests should update you if the guest count changes between booking and the stay and send an alteration request. You might consider charging a small additional nightly fee over so many people. You can set it up in your listing so that guests see that when they try to reserve for more than a certain number, though nominal as it might be some still do their darndest to avoid it.

We don't allow infants but have noticed an uptick in requests to stay with infants. I think there are a lot of pandemic babies are parents who want places to travel to. Life is still strange for many people. But nonetheless, guests routinely try to wedge more people into listings than they state. And if you have any gray area in your rules, ABB will definitely side with the guest. 

I would leave the following review on this party:

"So and so were pleasant/clean/quiet (whatever nice thing you can honestly say.) Future hosts may want to verify how many visitors they will have during their stay. We were not 100% clear on this and the guest brought a family member over multiple times to babysit while they went out, which caused us some concern regarding our insurance coverage. Nonetheless they were guests we would have back as long as we came to an understanding about capacity and visitors. We thank them for staying with us."

[Sarah4001]

Thanks @Laura2592 

Overall these guests were great guests… So, as @Colleen253  had suggested, I let this incident go and updated the House Rules.

Turns out he’s a Firefighter/EMT and she’s a school teacher.

The sister/babysitter/extra unregistered guest is also a teacher that works with Special Needs children. So good people in general. 

I made no mention of extra guest in either public or private remarks. They gave me 5-Stars.

Plus since the babysitter/sister lives in the area, there is a good chance that they will be back.

Thanks all & Cheers~