Reviews loophole - mental health concern for refunded guest

[Kim2654]

I booked a 30 night stay in a room in an apartment with the owner and their partner. Room was listed as 'private'.

On getting to the 2 bedroom apartment, 1 room was booked to a young foreign couple with little spoken english and the other room to me. The 'owner' (never saw a partner) essentially squatted in his lounge for 9 of my 10 nights. He would go in my room when I wasn't there (I'd notice things had moved and/or felt he'd been in there) and every other day he'd either be asking for access to my private room. On day 10 (I'd normally not be there) he attempted entering my room, unannounced. I was naked. 

I contacted AirBnB requesting a refund. They reviewed the case and gave me a full refund. I thought that was it...

The host decided to write a review on me. Full of half truths, some lies and stated AirBnB backed him and gave me no refund. I have found this very distressing. 

I contacted AirBnB, fuming, that a bad host could review me but apparently he can. 

AirBnB's policy on this needs to include,  if AirBnB deem a host has wronged a guest, the host cannot write a review on the guest. How or who can I escalate this to? I am mortified that AirBnB can allow his comments about me to remain on my profile page when I wanted nothing to do with the man. Also, I had to review him to enable to see what he'd written about me to ascertain whether I should report his message. With so much talk around mental health and cyber bullying these days, I'm flabbergasted this can actually happen. I wanted to move forward, now I've had to read his bull**bleep** review of me and it also needs to remain there - forever - because that's his version of events. This is not right. Can anyone help?

[Mike-And-Jane0]

@Helen3 I couldn't agree more. The listing says:  'This is a large executive suite in our apartment home; guests have full access to our living room, dining area and patio, including a full laundry with automatic washing machine and a dryer. We are happy for you to share our home and we are also very respectful of your privacy.'

How can you have full access to the living room if the host is sleeping in it!

[Dixie7]

Totally agree with you @Helen3. Obviously this host is trying to cream it by over-letting the actual space he has. I think Airbnb might have had a word or two with him ... hopefully!

[John5097]

 "'Legal advice' would be petty, malicious & vindictive."

How exactly is getting advice malicious and vindictive? That's just you making assumptions about someone else's intentions. Legal advice could very well say its an inharent risk and best to take up the ABB for all I know. That's why I don't give legal advice. Yet you claim to be an expect, but ** in the short while I've been here. Also assume she only wanted a refund. Something to keep in mind that homeshare STR can't even get insurance in the US.  I don't want host like this giving the rest of us guy host a bad rep. If they can't stay out of someone's private space they shouldn't be hosting. 

Edit: 
Now when anyone reads both reviews they will realize there are no consequences for host to invade private space, retaliatory review, and keep on hosting. 

@Helen350 

**[Off-topic comment removed in line with - Community Center Guidelines]

[Helen350]

@John5097 It's petty,malicious & vindictive, because it implies that the person seeking legal advice wants to take things further... It's petty, cos the event is in the PAST, the ** cancelled her booking, and spitefully wangled a refund from Airbnb, - who STILL paid the host cos they could see the host did nothing wrong!

Reading between the lines of other reviews, this host seems much loved by his other 74 guests & does not appear to be a threat to the safety of women!

Remember, this listing was a PRIVATE HOME! In the UK, it is the LAW that homeowners have right of accesss to ALL parts of their own homes at all times even when letting rooms! It is the LAW that bedroom locks are not required in private rooms where the landlord LIVES in the house. (Think fire escapes.)

This incident sounds like an honest mistake. No one was hurt. The host left a review which made him sound like a reasonable, decent person, whereas the review from the guest sounded unhinged, the sort that no one would want to host after such malicious allegations, both in her review of the poor host, and in her response to the host's review of her.

Airbnb hosts & guests should operate in a spirit of give &  take, ESPECIALLY in home share situations. Least said soonest mended, I say!

What could be more BAD MANNERS than to stay in someone's PRIVATE HOME as a GUEST - and then consult legal advice! Some host has graciously allowed you into their OWN HOME, and life, and yourepay them with talk of suing?? How damaging to a poor host's mental health! (The title of the thread mentioned 'mental health'  for some strange reason, though the poor host is in a much more vulnerable position here.)

I read a phrase here a couple of years ago; I don't know who wrote it, but I often quote it: "WHEN A HOST OPENS THE DOOR TO AN AIRBNB GUEST, THEY EXPECT A GRACIOUS GUEST, NOT AN ENTITLED CUSTOMER!" - Live & let live!

**[Inappropriate comment removed in line with the Community Center Guidelines]

[Sarah977]

@Helen350  This host didn't make a "mistake", although he likely didn't intend to walk in in his guest naked.

It isn't a "mistake" that he left personal items he required on a continual basis in a so -called "private" room he rented out to a guest. It wasn't a "mistake" that he entered without knocking, nor is it a "mistake" that he doesn't make the living arrangements clear in his listing.

Regardless of what the law says, a host entering a guest's "private room" should be kept to the bare minimum. It's one thing for you to keep extra linen in a closet in the guest room and let your guests know you may need to access it, it's quite another for the host to be going in and out of the room on a daily basis to get his clothes for the day, or other personal items. He was acting like he was sharing the room with the guest, wanting to still use it himself, yet charging a guest to stay there. 

The privacy of a guest is something that needs to be respected, and this host obviously doesn't. I don't care how many good reviews he has, I would have checked out of this place the first day when I became aware of the scene. And I would have left a scathing review, regardless if he walked in on me naked.

And it's really tacky and uncomfortable for guests to find the host makes his bed on the couch in what he lists as a common living room. 

My daughter came to visit for a week when I had a guest. She bedded down on the living room couch, but my living room is not listed as a shared space, and there is a curtain which separates it from the kitchen, which is guest shared space. Nor do my guests have to walk through the living room to get to the bathroom- they have their own ensuite bathroom. I also let the guest know that my daughter would be here well before he arrived, as my listing states the house is shared only with the host.

This host just appears greedy, entitled and rude to me.

[Kim2654]

@Helen350 

I'm unhinged? He walked in my room, unannounced, while I was naked. 

I advised James that I wanted to leave and asked if I could have a refund. He told me to contact AirBnB. I  did. They were amazing. They advised I would only pay for my 10 nights and they would refund my other 20+ nights. Much to my surprise, AirBnB later contacted me stating they'd reviewed the case and I'd receive a full refund. I was totally surprised and very appreciative. 

I left it at that. Walked away. I didn't want to review James because I wanted nothing further to do with him. 

Due to him reviewing me, I was forced to read his lies so I could respond with my version of events. Because AirBnB didn't tell him I was fully refunded, his ego got the better of him. He posted half truths and lies because he thought he could get away with it. 

My issue is, why would AirBnB enable EITHER party to post a review if one party received a full refund? AirBnB have already determined one party has breached policy. Of course there's going to be sour grapes. If anyone writes or says a pack of lies about anyone, it's bullying. AirBnB's platform is allowing bullying. 

[Mike-And-Jane0]

@John5097 I am not overly acquainted with US or Australian law but I am not sure legal advice will help. I am fairly sure you cannot sue the host for being a knob.

@Kim2654 Having looked at your reviews I really wouldn't worry about the review. Based on your other reviews and the response you left to his review we, and I am sure most hosts, would certainly not hesitate to host you.

[Mary996]

@Kim2654 

 I am appalled to hear what happened to you and so sorry. I also think that you are a heroine! How about this for perspective: Not only have you had a free holiday (Yay!) but you have also issued a clear warning to other single women that the Host of that Listing is an obnoxious, male chauvinist pig, a pervert and a Philanderer. I bet he knew precisely what he was doing. Pleeeeeease leave your Response to Review. I assure you that you will be doing a fantastic public service.

Does that help? xxxxxxxxxxx 

[Helen350]

A little harsh @Mary996 ! - Could it be that the host ONLY went in the room to get his belongings? And as M&J say, was a 'bit of a knob' for not checking that @Kim2654 was in residence?! 

- I keep all my spare bedding in one of my letting rooms, cos there is nowhere else to keep it! I also go in & get bits without asking, tho' I do knock first to make sure the guest is out! AND I only enter around the times of day when it is reasonable to expect the guest to be out at work or sight seeing! My check in is 5pm & my check out is 11am, so I can reasonably expect guests to be out between 11am & 5pm! 

I also sleep in my living room! - A lady in the next town used to let her own bedroom in a 1-bedroom flat. When she did so, she herself slept in the living room

Sometimes I think people have unrealistic expectations about 'private rooms'.... It just means it's not a dormitory; that there will not be beds in the room occupied by strangers, it does not mean that you won't encounter other guests or residents of the house on the landing.

[Helen350]

Right! I've just read the reviews, and my sympathies are with the HOST! 

- I would not be put off from staying with that host, but I would be reluctant to host that guest!

[Mary996]

Sorry @Helen350  why are you replying to me? Please convey the benefit of your wisdom and hopefully support for this beseiged Guest.

[Dixie7]

@Helen350 I don't know about in the UK but in Australia, I maybe naive, but I believe and would expect, and I certainly wouldn't call it unrealistic, for a 'Private Room' to be a private room and the listing should clearly state 'the host will not enter the guest's private space unless the guest specifically requests the host to do so'. 

[Helen3]

It's the same in the UK I would never dream of lying to a guest and claiming they had full access to the living room when I was using it as my bedroom. @Dixie7 

Nor would I leave personal belongings in the guests private room so I regularly needed to go in, nor would I leave bedding/towels there.

the only time I would go into the guests room is when I agree with them in advance to go in and clean the room/change the bedding on a weekly basis. Apart from that it's their private space and there is no reason for a host to go in apart from an emergency 

@Helen350 store linens in your own bedroom then you wouldn't have to invade your guests privacy 

[Cathie19]

Hi @Kim2654. May I apologise for the weirdness and inappropriate behaviour of a fellow host. How creepy! He should not have squatted in the living room, nor should he come and go into your room, which was listed as private.  How can anyone feel comfortable knowing they have “outed” the host from their room? Ew.....

However, to cut a long story short, you “aced” the response to this host and I personally, would not hold the review against you. Well done sister! You have also sent a clear “warning” message to future guests. 👏🏼👏🏼

So maybe when renting a private room in the future, or a hostel styled room, if you are uncomfortable, enquire if the room has a door lock on it. Find out...   🙂

Also consider travelling with a portable door lock that fits most doors. I personally have the quick lock which I bought a few years ago when we travel overseas. But I also gave one to a couple of young friends who are always travelling for work and study. Doesn’t work if you are outside the room, but stops someone coming in to the room when you are in it. Including bedrooms and bathrooms, even with a key. But as a matter of safety, ensure you know how to install and remove it quickly, if there was an emergency.  It doesn’t do all doors, but you can check out the types that might suit your needs.

[Mary996]

Fantastic response @Cathie19 . 

I love it some good sisterly support and cracking security tips. Absolutely brilliant  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx