@Ma43 I did look at the message exchange just now. (Although you really can't post private message exchanges on a public forum and that will likely be removed by the moderators).
The place does look super neglected and the host's responses are quite unprofessional. He's basically saying he knows the place is in bad repair but doesn't care.
The problem Ma, is that you willingly participated in this extortion by agreeing to it. And there is a written record of that. No one forced you to do that. A host has no right to ask you not to review, for any reason, unless you never actually stayed, which would be reasonable. And by not reviewing, you missed your chance to warn other guests about this place and the host's inappropriate responses.
And as I said, it is not acceptable to continue to stay somewhere and expect to get a full refund. You stayed, used the utilities, dirtied towels and sheets, etc, so the most you could hope for in a situation like this, disregarding the review extortion, would be a discount or partial refund. Which a decent host would offer without being asked if they were made aware that things weren't okay.
I think you are going to have to chalk this up to a learning experience- you will now know how to handle things if you should ever be unlucky enough to encounter such a situation in the future.
If it's any consolation, hosts also experience terrible situations with bad guests who cause extensive damages, and end up out of pocket for thousands of dollars. They also have to chalk it up to a learning experience, whether that means learning to vet their guests better, changing the wording in the listing desciption so as not to attract the partier crowd, etc.
I'm glad you have had other good experiences with Airbnbs in the past, so you know this isn't a normal occurrance. I'm sorry this happened to you.
