Hosting Ultra Orthodox Guests

Dionne1
Level 5
Philadelphia, PA

Hosting Ultra Orthodox Guests

Well, after 4-5 years of hosting on this platform, we had a first. We hosted a family of ultra-orthodox guests in our Airbnb. They did not make us aware of their religious requirements prior to their arrival and we were constantly caught off guard regarding how their presence would impact our own quality of life and schedule. Putting it nicely, this reservation was a disaster. We will be revising our description, house rules, and outgoing messages so that we can state (professionally) that we do not want to be in this situation again. 

 

Below is my draft review. Has anyone else had this experience? 

 

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We’ve hosted hundreds of guests from around the world, and the overwhelming majority of people are a pleasure to host. However, some reservations can be difficult and this one TAKES. THE. PRIZE. I will list the issues that made this reservation a challenging one:

 

  1. This family of four arrived three hours early (with short notice) and seemed displeased when they couldn’t have access to the suite. I offered them the opportunity to leave their luggage in our sunroom, however, they were visibly upset.
  2. They grew even more upset when they realized they would not have their own refrigerator or freezer for their food. One of their family members pointedly asked, “What are you going to do with your food in the freezer?” After I explained that I was not in the position to discard of my family’s food, they aggressively jammed their food into the fridge and rearranged my family’s food to accommodate for theirs.
  3. It was clear that they did not read our listing thoroughly; they thought they would have our entire home to themselves. This led to significant tension, aggressive body language, and communication misfires from our guests. I invited them to seek other accommodations, however they chose to stay.
  4. When going over the house rules, I specifically asked that they not dispose of cigarette butts in our yard. Not only did these guests dispose of cigarette butts in our yard, but they threw them right outside our front door, onto our patio. Hosts who take pride in their home will most likely find this practice nasty and disrespectful. 
  5. These guests constantly slammed doors throughout their stay. I asked that they stop slamming the doors and while it stopped briefly, it picked back up. Again, there appeared to be little regard or respect for us and our property.
  6. Their religious beliefs prevent them from operating technology and other mechanical devices during their Sabbath. This meant we had to open the doors for them, turn lights on and off for them, eliminate the lighting in our refrigerator, go behind and unplug cooking devices, etc. I had to cancel my Saturday plans so they could have someone to open the door for them during this time. 
  7. Their strict religious lifestyle required an usually high amount of hands on engagement from us as hosts. At no point were any of these requirements communicated prior to their arrival. We pride ourselves in being flexible and accommodating for our guests, however, this caught us by surprise and left us feeling blindsided and very inconvenienced. Furthermore, there was an air of entitlement and despite everything we did to accommodate this family, felt unappreciated for our time and efforts. 

The good news is that XXXX's mother was friendly and they left the suite and kitchen in good condition. 

 

48 Replies 48
Kath9
Level 10
Albany, Australia

Wow @Dionne1, it sounds like you went well above and beyond your requirements as a host to accommodate this family! What a disaster! I haven't had this experience myself except for a few guests whose religion prevents them from touching dogs and therefore expected me to keep my (ultra-friendly) dog away from them. Why on earth they would book accommodation with a dog in that case is beyond me. I think your review is fine but I would be careful naming the specific religion as you risk having your review removed by Airbnb on the grounds of discrimination. Give them the thumbs down to prevent them instant booking with future hosts.

@Kath9 thanks for pointing that out. Thought I was still using general terms and not making specific reference to a religion. Thankfully, I run any potentially negative reviews by Airbnb (and this forum) before posting just to make sure I am not running afoul of the rules. I certainly don't want to be offensive.

 

And your situation with the dog sounds like you went through something equally bizzare. 

 

Thanks for the feedback. Much appreciated. 🙂

Michael956
Level 10
Salvador, Brazil

What a nightmare!  That was very selfish of  them to book your space without informing you of their special needs.  

@Michael956 Amen!  "Selfish" is the perfect descriptor. 

Kelly149
Level 10
Austin, TX

Don’t change anything about your listing. I’m frankly jealous of what your guests have said about you and what you say about your guests. 

I also wouldn’t use that review. Too many words. I’d just say “we did not enjoy this visit. Not well-suited to a shared home. “

Then thumbs down. Mark stars as you think and go on with your normally great guests. 

@Kelly149 Thank you for the feedback. I'm always torn by much shorter reviews, but wonder if its enough of a signal to future hosts. I do like @Jessica-and-Henry0's suggestion below and will most likely go that route. 

 

Thanks for your insights on our listing. We really do enjoy hosting and have been especially fortunate with our guests. 🙂

 @Dionne0 I don’t think you need to incorporate much from these guests bc their behavior is so out of bounds. But the one thing that comes to mind is something that I think more hosts need to prepare themselves to be VERY comfortable saying. 

NO

No, That isn’t possible 

No, We won’t be doing that. 

No, That isn’t what we offer. 

No....

 

and if all that that doesn’t work. “Please, let me help you with your bags, because you are leaving.”

 

Antonio-Luis0
Level 10
Málaga, Spain

I don't think that points 1 to 5 have anything to do with their religion, just being badly informed unpolite guest. 

 

I would not have cancelled my saturday plans for opening fridge doors if I hadn't agreed on thad before.

@Antonio-Luis0  Yes, you are correct. I cancelled my plans mostly to keep the peace and make sure they wouldn't be left out in the cold. I certainly won't do it again, though. 

@Dionne1

If it were me I'd try to make the review shorter. 

 

Guest and family  arrived hours earlier than the check in time and when they couldn’t have immediate access to the suite they were visibly upset. It was clear that they did not read our listing; they thought they would have our entire home to themselves which led to significant tension and aggressive body language. They not only threw cigarette butts in our yard, but they threw them right outside our front door and onto our patio. They also constantly slammed doors throughout their stay. The guests also expected us (hosts) to open the doors for them, turn lights on and off for them, eliminate the lighting in our refrigerator and unplug cooking devices during their Sabbath.  At no point were any of these requirements communicated prior to their arrival. We pride ourselves in being flexible and accommodating for our guests, however, this caught us by surprise and left us feeling blindsided and very inconvenienced. Based on our hosting experience, we would not welcome these guests back into our home. 

@Jessica-and-Henry0 THANK YOU!! I like your version much better. I always get great feedback from the community. 🙂

@Jessica-and-Henry0 Just heard back from Airbnb. I shared your edited version of the review with them and they gave it a thumbs up. Thanks again! 🙂

@Dionne1 What a nightmare, and in my opinion, NOTHING to do with religion!

But to avoid to give them ANY ground, I would replace "Sabbath"

with Friday evening and Saturday... The world is crazy and I

totally see them going after you with (in there mind) one single wrong word...

CC @Jessica & Henry

 

@Giedre-and-Andre0 Thank you for the feedback. Yes, I have taken the collective wisdom of the host community and have edited my review. And yes, the world is absolutely crazy!