You must remember, @Jeannie30, that the host is responsible for prices...
#1 depends on your availability settings - booking window -> check what you set over there;
#2 she clicked the button, you got the message - the system sent it;
#3 again requested balance was through the system, not really any copy of that message visible for you, be careful - she might be cheating with that deposit (just my sense) since you didn't cancel the reservation (do not do it - penalties);
#4 nobody cancelled, again - be careful.
But now sth good - you're on Instant Book. Check if you qualify for a legit cancellation: https://www.airbnb.com/help/article/2022/how-do-penalty-free-cancellations-work-for-instant-book-hos...
If you do, contact Airbnb and ask them to cancel for any reason from the above link.
To contact Airbnb Customer Service - use Twitter @AirbnbHelp
or the form: https://www.airbnb.com/help/contact_us#/
Or you will find a pinned post in the Help section how to do it:
https://community.withairbnb.com/t5/Help/Contact-Airbnb-A-Community-Help-Guide/m-p/16165#M728
// "The only person you can trust is yourself"