Nervousness when I get a review!

[Nick1866]

Hi all,

Does anyone else feel absolutely petrified when getting the email saying a guest has written a review? The nerves that they may have written a negative review, or not scored you as highly as you'd liked? Or you're picked up on something you don't feel is fair.

I always make a quick sign of the cross before opening anything!

How do people get around this?

Nick

[Sarah977]

@Nick1866  I can't say I've ever felt like that. I'm a home share host like you and I get really nice guests, so I've never felt nervous about the review they'd leave.

Maybe you should fix yourself a stiff drink before looking at the reviews 🙂

Honestly, hosts put far too much brain cells into fretting about reviews. Concentrate on hosting in whatever way works for you, enjoy your guests, and don't let the review issue stress you out, it's really not worth it.

[Nick1866]

Thanks Sarah, appreciate the response.

It's always the fear though that if you get consistently low reviews, you could be booted off the Airbnb platform.

- Nick

[Anonymous]

@Nick1866   There are active listings with average ratings around 3.5 that are not only still on the platform but also still getting bookings. Airbnb scares every host into thinking they're just one false step away from being kicked out, but that's just the way they control the truly ambitious people like yourself. They keep horrific listings live all the time while also suspending people over some random glitch in the algorithm or a bogus complaint - this is totally out of your hands and not worth the worry.

Anyway, the platform is just a tool that you use. If there's demand for the space and service you offer, it doesn't need a specific brand behind it. 

[Hazel-Bank0]

Great words!

[Sarah977]

@Nick1866  But how does stressing out about reviews change that? If you get such consistently low reviews (you have a 4.89 rating! That's high. And tons of nice written reviews) that Airbnb would boot you off (not likely), how is sweating in dread about a review a guest has submitted and you haven't read yet in any way productive? 

Ever hear of the Serenity Prayer?

The Serenity Prayer is a prayer written by the American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr[1][2] (1892–1971). It is commonly quoted as:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.

[Shikha12]

@Sarah977 this is a great tip, as a new host I was too concerned about it. Will focus on hosting & let it all flow, thanks Sarah.

[Emilia42]

@Nick1866 

I know how you feel. Too well. 

[Anonymous]

@Nick1866   The moment I started feeling that, I had to take stock of the situation and ask myself:  "what the actual f***?"

What's the point of being self-employed if you're still constantly looking over your shoulder at how a shady corporation's algorithm is assessing you?  Where's the joy in welcoming people into your home if you're just going to be stressed about how they judge it on a website?  This is some seriously dystopian thinking about how we relate to our home lives and the very subtle art of hospitality. It's like the Black Mirror version of the job. 

I do still hate the feeling of waiting until the final analysis to know what a cold, unresponsive customer was feeling during all the time I couldn't get a read on them. And in my last years of hosting before the pandemic, I specifically selected guests for the warmth in their communication - after all, their demeanor has a direct impact on the quality of my home life, and I don't want to come home from a hard day in my actual job to feel like I'm trapped in another nightmare. 

If you find yourself stressing about your reviews, it's probably time to recalibrate - make some changes to how seriously you take Airbnb's mind-manipulation BS, be open to declining guests you don't click with, and recognize that the one great thing about being self-employed is that you have the freedom to create the job you truly want. 

Sometimes you'll still get a critical remark - and maybe it's actually a point worth considering, despite the common belief among hosts that they're all completely perfect and any criticism is totally out of line and should be immediately censored. It need not affect your quality of life, though.

Offering a service to the public as an independent operator is only a good pursuit for you if you're able to accept the judgment and criticism - not always "fair" - that comes with the territory.  If you were a novelist, and you found the thought of your prose being torn apart by critics unbearable, you'd probably be well advised not to publish it. Well, renting your home out to strangers on the internet is a lot like publishing your memoir and hawking it on Amazon - it requires just as much thickness of skin as that novelist should have.

[Ann72]

@Anonymous  That's funny, I was going to mention novelists in my response.  I've worked with writers for 40 years and I have never met one who doesn't care about reviews.  Obviously the published ones learn to live with them, but don't think they don't flinch when book #9 is coming out and they hear the Times has planned to review it!

[Nick1866]

You'll never guess what I do as a full-time job! I'm a journalist.... So I can see that point.

Thanks for all the lovely supportive responses on this post, It means a great deal to me.

[Ann72]

That's funny, @Nick1866 - I hadn't guessed!  @Anonymous yes - more concerned, because of its impact on their career.  But there's a lot of similarity.  They would really care WHAT Michi (I miss her, don't you?) had to say.  And that ONE review in the Times can make or break.  But they also care if they get a whole series of 3-star reviews on Amazon.  The individual reviews and what they say are of little importance.  It's the accumulation of stars that can make or break.  So it's a really apt comparison.

[Anonymous]

@Ann72   I bet your novelists are much more concerned about a professional review from the Times or the New Yorker than about what star rating they'll get on Amazon or Goodreads - so maybe I should have put it like that.

Obviously no Airbnb guest in a flatshare will be the literary equivalent of Michiko Kakutani in her review, even when she herself is the guest.

[Ann72]

@Nick1866  I feel you.  The anxiety comes from having been blindsided on one or two occasions.  That is all it takes to instill the worry.  You can't always predict who will slam you. 

There's also the annoying way reviews are presented to hosts.  You get the email saying Here's what so-and-so wrote, but if you click through, you're brought to your reviews as a traveler.  So you can't see the stars.  You therefore have to go to your dashboard or the performance tab and drill down until you can get to the review as seen from the hosting side.  This is just tedious and annoying because all you really want to know is the stars.  Because - back to that stupid anxiety - you've had a million nice reviews and been pleased by them only to find out they are sometimes covering up lower stars. 

So while I'm not scared stiff, I'm not thrilled at all the hoops I have to jump through to see the outcome.

Having said all of this, it's important we remember the lesson that @Ute42 has taught us again and again, which @Anonymous references - none of it matters when you're getting bookings.  Nicely worded reviews make more of a positive impact on the next guests than lower stars.  People looking at your listing will not wonder if those nice words hide a darker story.  Written complaints about the stay, the accommodation, or the host are far more likely to deter listings than a drop in star count.

It's just human nature to hate to get a bad review.

[Dimitar27]

No, never.

You must be more confident in yourself.