Nutty guest went mad when I asked her to lock the door and take her shoes off

[Neil408]

I'm sure many times on Airbnb we've had odd guests but I think this has to rank as the strangest.

So a guest checked in via my outside lockbox an hour before I came back from work  - she was okay in her communication beforehand. I came back from work and found the door had not been locked so I locked it after I came in which I do normally.

I then went upstairs and found she'd trailed mud all the way through the house all over my carpets. The check in instructions ask people to remove their shoes 'because I have cream carpets that stain very easily' which I feel is clear enough. I was a little peeved but 5 minutes with a hoover fixed it. I knocked on the door to talk to her and got no answer so figured she might be asleep and decided to message her on the app.

I then politely messaged her saying 'sorry to trouble you Martina but I think you have forgotten to take your shoes off. My carpets stain very easily and it's really important that you don't walk on the carpet with shoes at they can take a long time to clean. Also could you please remember to lock the door when you go in and out. Kind regards, Neil'

Two minutes later I heard someone running down the stairs in their shoes (the wooden stairs make a distinctive click-clack noise when you walk on them in shoes) then unlock the front door and slam it without locking it. I figured she'd gone out for food so I locked it after her. 

An hour later I got a message from Airbnb demanding a refund saying the host had made her uncomfortable with 'multiple messages asking me to remove my shoes' and that the host had 'locked the door from the inside,  locking her in and she was forced to use the key and couldn't get out without unlocking it first'. Let's be clear here, I sent her a single (polite in my opinion) message in my opinion asking her to remove her shoes and explaining why and asking her to lock the door. 

Later on I found the key thrown on the kitchen floor which she must have flung it after 'escaping'. 

I lock the door to keep all occupants safe. All guests have keys and are able to leave at any time.

Of course I declined the refund but she's challenging it via Airbnb. Not sure on what basis but I don't feel I've done anything wrong here.

She could have come to me and said 'Hi your messages are making me upset' and I would have gladly discussed it but to just vanish (without telling me) is just weird and odd behaviour.

[Anonymous]

@Neil408  The guest is clearly not a well woman, and had she not voluntarily decided to terminate the stay, the best course of action would have been for you to do so. The result of that would have been a full refund anyway. So while you're within your rights to dispute the refund request, it's probably not really worth escalating.

Neither as a guest nor as a host have I found that self-check-in was great for shared homes. A situation like this where you wind up finding a psycho in your house is a more extreme example, but overall I find that setting the right tone at arrival makes a big difference to the outcome of the stay. 

[Katrina79]

@Neil408 @Oh my she flew off very quickly! Challenging the refund doesn’t make you right or wrong or prove your message to her was polite or your intentions genuine. I think you got lucky here with her moving out! Now, quickly accept the refund before she tries to come back and create misery for everyone in the house. 

[Neil408]

I declined it via Airbnb and haven't heard anything since so fingers crossed...

[Helen3]

I live in the UK - in a large city and find it rather odd to ask guests to lock the door once they are inside . Surely that presents a fire risk ?

do you not have a door that automatically locks when you shut it?

apart from that I would say a lucky escape in terms of your guest @Neil408 

[Sarah977]

@Helen3  I've never had a door anywhere I've lived that "automatically locks" from the inside after closing it. You unlock the door to enter, then have to turn some sort of little knob or something (not use the key) to relock it from the inside.

@Neil408  She sounds like a nutcase, so anything you would have said probably wouldn't have made a difference, but if I needed to say something to a guest who had checked in while I was out and I hadn't met yet, I would be a little more welcoming while asking them to do something. Like "Hi XX, Welcome. I hope you had no trouble getting in, and that you've made yourself comfortable. You might have missed it in my listing wording, or just forgotten, but it's important to lock the front door from the inside after you come in, for all of our security, and to please remove street shoes before walking across the carpets, as the light color of them easily stains. You were probably just distracted when you arrived.

Thanks in advance for your attention to this. Neil"

[Fred13]

@Sarah977 suggestive message has that delicate tone that allows a host to ask for anything and not offend anyone.  Also humor works very well with guests, if you are into humor. English people are well-known for it. 🙂

@Neil408 For a shared place you do have a delicate reality (a light-colored rug) and a security requirement (to always keep door locks whether in or out),  both require a light touch, especially with touchy guests..

[Neil408]

That's true - As a day job I'm a project manager in oil and gas so prefer my communication to be clear, direct and to the point. I probably could have used a little more humour and delicate tone I agree but I guess I was a little annoyed that I had to clean up after someone despite there being clear previous instructions however I don't feel I came across as particularly negative in what I said.

[Sarah977]

@Neil408  It wasn't negative at all, it was polite, but when dealing with guests it works better to soften your phrasing when correcting their behavior. Dealing with guests isn't the same as professional commmunication in the job world.

For instance, as a home share host, I'll work an "ask" into a casual conversation, so it doesn't come across like I'm nitpicking them. 

"Hey, how was your day? We haven't had such nice weather for weeks. Oh, hey, could you remember to wipe down the counters after you use the kitchen- it'll be a real drag if we get mice in here. I'm going food shopping in an hour, do you need me to pick anything up for you?"

I tend to be really direct in conversations with clients, family and friends (I've even been called tactless), but I often choose my  phrasing differently when dealing with guests. It depends also on what the guests are like. I've had super easygoing guests who fit right in and felt like friends from the moment they arrived. The kind of guests I'll share a bottle of wine with, or invite along on a beach day with friends and have a lot of laughs with. With a guest like that, I might very well say, "Hey, dude, what's with the crumbs and jam all over the counter? Do I look like your mama? When we get mice in here, you get to set the traps and deal with the dead rodents. Or you could do what everyone else does and wipe the counter when you're done in the kitchen, with that cloth there. "

[Fred13]

@Neil408 Trust me I hear you. Yesterday a group of 6 arrived and I could tell by their manner they had zero intentions of listening nor following instructions. So I coached and send someone else to be 'the heavy', otherwise an axe battle would have ensued.

[Neil408]

I don't feel it's odd to ask people to lock the door at all. I feel its safer to lock it. After all the guest is given a key and it takes 2 seconds to unlock it. Do you not lock your door at night?

My last place before I moved here (despite being in a nice area) was burgled around about 3am by 3 guys whilst I was in and an Airbnb guest and I had to fight them off. Fortunately they didn't get anything. I had left the door to my apartment unlocked as it was such a safe area but never again just because it's 'safe' shouldn't make me not want to lock the door. After all the door being unlocked invalidates my home insurance anyway....

I don't feel I'm being paranoid based on my experiences.

I don't have a door that automatically locks, I'm assuming you're referring to a yale lock door.

[Helen3]

@Neil408 If you are asking me, no I don't use a key to lock my door from the inside when I have guests.

As I mentioned it would be a fire risk unless you have a separate fire escape provision. If you have smoke or a fire it doesn't matter if it only takes a few seconds to unlock the door, your guest/you would like to be overcome by fumes trying to find the key.

As I said my door locks when it closes as do the doors in most English houses. I am not quite sure how you have a door that doesn't lock when it closes. I would be inclined to buy a door lock which locks automatically rather than have guests have to lock it. 

[Neil408]

Most places I’ve lived in (in fact all?) don’t have the spring loaded yale lock type you’re referring to. The only place I’ve seen that is on my friends apartment in London but on UPVC doors you usually have just a key lock. My apartment had a turn lock inside previously but not an auto closing lock. They are however more common on wooden doors. 

I wasn’t asking you if you used a key to lock your door but whether you locked it at all. Since I don’t have the Yale lock type you have and it can’t be fitted then it’s reasonable to ask guests to lock the door once they’re in.

Id rather be safe from burglars and I have smoke alarms all over the house and you can climb out of the windows if you really had to. 

[Normen0]

My suggestion and reaction would be to agree to the refund minus the cleaning fee. Even if she hadn’t tracked mud all through the house, you now have to clean as she checked in,  especially in pandemic times ~ cleaning taking longer.  I’d offer the refund to just be assured she is gone and the issue is dealt with. Next. 

[Fred13]

Best part of your suggestion - 'Next'.