how to review a guest with messy kids?

[Danielle-And-Justin0]

Hi! 

I'm new to hosting, we're on our 5th guest right now so I was hoping for some advice.  We had our first family with children stay, a 4 year old, a 2 year old and a 4 month old.  We knew kids would be messier but I'm just wondering what people consider a normal amount of mess vs leaving a semi-negative review? 

They left food/crumbs all over the floor, food splattered on the wall, play-doh pieces smashed into the barstool seat cushions and somehow smashed on the bath rug, they tore about a 3 inch hole in our new couch (right on the corner so not super noticeable).  And stained the sheets. 

It took us a lot longer to clean the space and the only permanent damage was the couch.  We do charge a cleaning fee, and they did follow the house rules.  I'm having a hard time on what to write for their review.  Suggestions/advice?  

Thanks! 

Danielle 

[Rowena29]

Hi @Danielle-And-Justin0 

I'm not sure why I'm answering really because I really suck at writing reivews like this and frequently come to these boards myself for very similar advice.

Howver, it is definitely much easier to write a review when you are distant and detached.

One great piece of advice hosts give - espeically @Sarah977  - is not to think of it as a negative review just think of it as an honest review. It doesn't have to been judgy or nasty.

other people will do much better than me, but you could say something like, XX  and her family adn very young children stayed for  xx days. From start to finish they were friendly communicative and followed my house rules.  ( if this is true) Unfrotunately, after checkout, a great deal more time than usual  was needed to clean and prepare for the next guests. I would welcome  xx again, if they were a more careful  and considerate about cleaning food and  debris from walls and soft furnishings"  ( that last bit might be a bit much, but it makes it clear it was more than just a few crumbs under the table, food splashed up a wall and not cleaned up is not acceptable IMO. and nor is playdoh everywhere and certainly not a torn couch. I have 3  maniac sons ( adults now)  and I would never leave a restaurant high chair like that let alone someone elses house)

I'm sure clever and more diplomatic people them me will have better ideas - just read them all and pluck out what you think suits. And definitely mark them down on cleanliness.

You could try claiming for the couch  - but that will almost certainly result in a bad review.  Or you could buy a removable sofa cover that covers the tear adn has the benefit of being machine washable.

Good luck!

[Danielle-And-Justin0]

Thank you so much @Rowena29 for the input and advice!! I think your example of a review is great!  I've been spending a few days mulling it over, and this helps a lot! 

[Colleen253]

@Danielle-And-Justin0  I agree with what @Rowena29  has said. It is hard to leave negative reviews...so it IS helpful to see them as honest, not negative, and always balance any negatives with the positives. Another good rule of thumb, if you are ever having a hard time bringing yourself to write a not so glowing review, or maybe tempted to be silent, and not leave one at all is..ask yourself whether you would want to host the guest again. If the answer is no, then the review is really important to write. Kudos to you for wanting to get it right.

[Sarah977]

@Danielle-And-Justin0  Yes, kids are often messy, all of us were as children. But guests cleaning up after themselves really has nothing to do with whether they had kids or not. It's the adults who are supposed to supervise their kids and make sure to leave the place reasonable. I raised 3 kids myself and I can tell you I wouldn't let my kids grind playdo into the rug at my own home and certainly not in anyone else's. Playdo got played with at the table, only. Food got eaten at the table, only. Hands got washed after eating before they were allowed to go wander around anywhere else. 

You can read hundreds, if not thousands of posts here, relating how filthy the guests with no kids left the place. So to me, when it comes to writing reviews, there is no reason to give guests a pass on cleanliness just because they had kids. If parents don't allow for the time it takes to clean up after their kids, or keep them from making a sticky, gooey mess all over in the first place, they should be reviewed accordingly.

[Danielle-And-Justin0]

@Sarah977 Thank you for your response.  That helps with what kind of expectations I should have from families with kids! 

[Branka-and-Silvia0]

@Danielle-And-Justin0  @Sarah977 

I noticed how tired, exhausted and in a bad mood are parents who travel with kids. Especially mothers. Almost all of them leave a mess behind. I think that's because they are happy to be able to spend a few days without cleaning and having someone else clean after their kids.

In a way, I can understand them....., but what they don't understand and don't care, is that we don't have a cleaning crew on payroll and we have just a few hours to clean the entire apartment or house before our next guests arrive. Not all of us are healthy and young enough to be able to do that.

They should book a hotel on a beach and rest there for a week or two, not traveling around with small kids.

[Danielle-And-Justin0]

@Branka-and-Silvia0 I like to try to put myself into other people's shoes before passing judgement and while I don't have children, I can try to imagine what it'd be like with an infant and two toddlers and I imagine it wouldn't be easy!  But at the end of the day I just want people to respect my space and the hard work I put into it, and yes if they want to leave a big mess for someone else to clean up, a hotel seems more appropriate.  

[Suzanne302]

@Danielle-And-Justin0  Came here to say exactly what @Sarah977 said! It doesn't matter if there were kids involved or not. Any mess created is the responsibility of the adults on the reservation so just be honest in your review about how they left your place and you'll be fine! A good rule to follow is to state facts and not emotional conclusions.

[Trevor243]

Leaving reviews is almost pointless. They can  open a new account if they want to use AirBnB again. Leaving a review might make you feel better, but that's about it.

Clean up, prepare for the next guests, check the information you leave for guests is very clear and says that you expect them to leave the property clean and tidy.

If they post a negative review with a low score, you can close the listing and start a new one that isn't impacted by a negative review score.

[Emilia42]

@Trevor243 

Guests have to be smart to work the system and fortunately, in my experience, many bad guests aren't that smart.

[Trevor243]

@Emilia42Yup .... and hosts just have to be smarter .... hosts need to stop stressing about leaving reviews .... remember that we're all in business .... do the best we can, take a knock every now and then, but carry on ....

[Emilia42]

@Danielle-And-Justin0 

Regarding: We do charge a cleaning fee, and they did follow the house rules. 

A lot of guests will rebuttal with the thought that a cleaning fee covers all their messes but we all know that it doesn't. 

When guests leave a place very messy (kids or no kids) that takes a significant amount of cleaning, I suggest to write in the review something along the lines of "extra cleaning was required past the allotted cleaning fee." This shows that while you as the host were expecting to clean, you weren't expecting to clean at the given level. It could also show that if you are paying professional cleaners, that you lost money on the cleaning fee.

[Laura2592]

@Danielle-And-Justin0  i  would stick to my formula. Say something good and then discuss any improvements. Finish with whether or not they are recommended to others.

For example "we enjoyed hosting this couple and their little ones. They (communicated well/were friendly/arrived on time/had interesting things to talk about/etc.) We did have to do some extra cleaning and some of the house rules were not followed which we discovered upon check out. We feel that our space may not be suitable for this group in the future."

They did not follow the house rules if they left the place in the condition that you describe. Any unreported damage is also a likely violation of house rules (and common courtesy.) We have hosted quite a few families and some have done a great job at corralling the kid mess. Others not so much. You should leave an honest review. Any specifics you can provide in private feedback. 

[Danielle-And-Justin0]

@Laura2592 Thank you for your example review! I appreciate it!