Difficult guest

Dawn47
Level 2
Irvine, United Kingdom

Difficult guest

I have been hosting for a few years, and I'm looking for advice on my current guest.  I am a bit annoyed, but don't know if I'm over reacting - would appreciate other's advice. 

 

1) I had already told her I wouldn't be home on Sunday, so advised to self check in, and gave her the key (she had visited a few days prior to the reservation).  My check in is 5pm - 8pm - she arrived at 12.50pm, so more than 4 hours early. 

 

2) I am unsure if she can work the door lock.  I showed her this when she visit prior to the reservation.  She struggled with this at the time, despite being told a number of times how to lock and unlock the door.  However since then, she hasn't needed to lock / unlock as I have been home when she has left / arrived.

 

3) since arriving, she has struggled to work the shower.  She went to my neighbour's house, and asked her to come to the bathroom to switch the shower off.  This is a neighbour I don't get on with, and don't feel this was appropriate.

 

4) she has, for the last two morning, complained about feeling cold.  I have my heating set to come on automatically in the morning and evening, should the temperature fall below a certain temperature.  I don't want to turn it up, as I will then be overly warm and feel uncomfortable in my own home.

 

5) today she has had someone in my house, who I don't know, for a period of 2 hours.  My listing specifically states "no unexpected guests".  Whilst the extra person isn't staying overnight, she has still been in my house for a prolonged period.

 

6) the reservation was made on behalf of someone.  The person who has booked through airbnb is the daughter of the lady who is actually staying.

 

7) she has on a number of occasions, indicated that she has an expectation that I would drive her to where she wants to go.  This is not a service I offer, and am in no way able to facilitate this

 

Any advice would be greatly appreciated

Thanks, Dawn

20 Replies 20
Alexandra316
Level 10
Lincoln, Canada

@Dawn47 6 is a dealbreaker: Airbnb does not allow third party bookings (booking on behalf of a friend or family member). It almost always leads to problems. Who knows how many of these problems are a result of the fact that the guest hasn't actually checked out the listing, because she wasn't the one to book?

 

And I don't think you're over-reacting: the guest sounds difficult. How much longer is she staying? If it's only another day, I would likely let it go. If longer:

1) Nothing you can do at this point.

2) Maybe review the lock with her again

3) Bizarre... who would go to a neighbor for that? Definitely odd, and not appropriate.

4) Offer an extra blanket.

5) I would send her a message through Airbnb messenger, reminding her of your rules, including regarding guests. Again, she may never have seen your rules if she didn't make the booking.

7) No is a complete sentence. I would provide her with the number of a local cab company and perhaps a bus schedule, and leave it at that. I don't know of many accommodations that offer a free chauffeur service.

Thanks for that. I am a genuinely nice person and don’t like confrontation which is why I’m struggling!! Today is day 3 of 21. So still for over two weeks to go. Not sure I’ll manage all that time!!!

@Dawn47 I hear you on the confrontation thing. If you feel you can't complete the booking, I would just call Airbnb and let them know that it's a third party booking and you're not comfortable with it. They will cancel for you without penalty, as it's against their terms and conditions.

 

I'm guessing she's quite young from your description. I would stay polite but firm if she's going to continue to stay with you.

Helen350
Level 10
Whitehaven, United Kingdom

@Alexandra316 - Not that young - her daughter made the booking!

 

@Dawn47  - Regarding the guest bothering neighbours: - It is stated in the Airbnb terms & conditions that guests are not to bother neighbours!

 

- I suspect the problem is that the guest is not au fait with Airbnb ways - owing to it being a 3rd party booking. I think I would approach things by sitting her down & explaining the culture & expectations gently.... Maybe ask also what her expectations were, what her daughter told her about Airbnb in general & your place in particular.... So if she thinks it's a hotel, you can gently put her right! Then negotiate if she (& you) can cope with her continuing to stay!

 

- Do keep us updated! 😉

@Helen350Yeah, I got that after... I misread it as the mother making the booking rather than the daughter. It also seems like very immature behaviour for a grown adult, let alone a senior citizen. 

Cathie19
Level 10
Darwin, Australia

Sorry to hear about your current guest @Dawn47 , they are definitely needy and sounding either high maintenance due to entitlement,  or just ignorant of the Airbnb community expectations. Though if she didn’t make the booking herself, then she probably has a false impression of what’s required with your homestay. Is this her first Airbnb experience?

 

As she is a third party booking, that can lead to many difficulties, including Airbnb service terms and conditions. You may need to ensure your comments or concerns are directed in writing to the booking individual, as they are the one you are wanting to leave you a review. It might also mean they won’t if it is not them staying! It also means they may not take any responsibility for anything that goes wrong with their guests on your site.  But you most certainly need to write in a friendly but firm manner, that as per house rules, other guests are not allowed. That the booking guest may wish to pass this information on to their guest.

 

If it is a short term rental, I’d try to breathe deep and put up with it; otherwise if a longer stay, maybe have a chat with them and recount it through the Airbnb message board. Also go back into your descriptor and house rules and make sure their is no ambiguity with them,

 

Good luck and keep us informed as to how it’s going.

Dawn47
Level 2
Irvine, United Kingdom

Thanks again. She’s actually elderly. In her mid seventies

Helen350
Level 10
Whitehaven, United Kingdom

@Dawn47  ... Figures.....!

Branka-and-Silvia0
Level 10
Zagreb, Croatia

@Dawn47 

if she is struggling with a lock and a shower and expects you to drive her around, then good luck with her for the next 20 days...

At your place I would cancel ASAP

 

Laylee0
Level 6
Gateshead, United Kingdom

@Dawn47 Could you message the daughter and explain the house rules to her and then she can reiterate them to her mum? You could say that if they aren’t followed you would need to cancel the booking and also (to maybe soften the blow) explain that Airbnb doesn’t allow 3rd party bookings but you took it as a show of good will?

Laylee0
Level 6
Gateshead, United Kingdom

@Dawn47 I do feel for you. I had a similar sounding guest but she was about 22 and also seemed to expect me to chauffeur her round (even got in a mood when I couldn’t), used to leave the heating on constantly and all sorts of other things that did my head in (including inviting her friends to stay!) I ended up asking Airbnb to cancel her booking and she had to find somewhere else to stay. 

Paul154
Level 10
Seattle, WA

@Dawn47 

Day 3 of 21 hell filled days!

21 days of a disallowed (3rd party) reservation?

There is a reason this loser did not make her own reservation.

GET HER OUT NOW!

It will only get worse.

Take a financial hit, do a purification ritual and rent to some quality guest.

 

Crazy losers in my house drive me crazy. I'd be afraid of my actions. The financial loss is nothing compared to doing a 20 - life sentence. 

Helen350
Level 10
Whitehaven, United Kingdom

A little harsh @Paul154  ("Crazy loser")

 

Perhaps she has the beginnings of dementia? I see a sweet, vulnerable, little old thing, who could be deeply traumatised by being thrown out.... I know i would be..... (assuming I wasn't deliberately misbehaving...)

Sarah977
Level 10
Sayulita, Mexico

@Dawn47  This is a typical clueless, incapable, entitled guest. Her age and the fact that she was probably not made aware of any of your house rules, etc, by her daughter are contibuting factors, and no, I don't think you are overreacting. 

If I were in this predicment, I think I'd sit down with the guest over a cup of tea and explain gently to her how Airbnbs work, what is expected of guests and hosts, and that it was really crucial that she was advised of your house rules, the fact that hosts don't offer chauffeur service, etc. Then I'd ask her if she would like for the booking to be cancelled, or whether she feels she could comply with house rules, accept the quite reasonable temperature you keep the house at, and attempt to understand how the door lock works, etc. If she seeems amenable to staying and complying, get her to lock and unlock the door a couple of times while you are standing there- hands-on practice is much better then verbal or written information.

If she still doesn't comply, or indicates she's not comfortable with your rules and the way you run your house, as others said, have Airbnb cancel the reservation on the basis that it was a 3rd party booking, with an assurance that you won't incur any penalties.

As far as her having people over, while I know many hosts don't allow this at all, and a guest should always ask permission from a host before just assuming they can invite others over, I personally don't see anything wrong with a 70 year old woman having a friend or two over to visit for a couple of hours- it's not like they're going to trash the place or be wild, loud and obnoxious. At least one would think not. I have a friend in Canada who hosts a private suite in her home. She gets lots of repeat guests and quite a few middle-aged or elderly couples. They do sometimes have friends over for a drink or conversation or a game of cards and she's fine with this. But like I said, guests should always ask permission first.