Guest with two profiles? (Follow up to my post about giving a bad review!)

[Suzanne302]

Remember my post needing advice for reviewing a bad guest? Well, as expected, she's upset! She never reviewed me and she didn't reply to my review of her, but she did send me a LONG message basically trashing my place since I gave her a bad review. If you want to read my review, and her message, they are below. But I have two new questions:

1 - She sent me this message from a DIFFERENT account, that still has her name?? The account she used when she booked with me was from April 2019. The account she sent this recent message from was from 2018. (no reviews on that account either) So how can someone have two accounts, both with verified ID's? I am guessing she changed her profile name somehow on one of the accounts and the two accounts must have different legal names?

2 - I see no option to block her. When you hit the flag on the message, it brings up several options, all of which lead to the most random complaints, but none allowing you to block. What am I missing??

For those who want to read my review of her:

"Guest and her daughter were very friendly guests but had some issues navigating the etiquette of a shared space. There was a loud phone conversation after 9pm in the shared space, lights were left on when leaving for the day as well as overnight, and the back door was left unlocked. The bedspread had multiple ink stains. It took a bit longer than usual to clean the room/bathroom after check-out. I believe she may have underestimated the socialization skills of her dog as the dog did not seem to enjoy being around new people and also peed on a rug. She allowed the dog on the couch, which is against house rules. Future hosts might just want to clarify rules and general house guidelines with these guests when they book."

And her message to me:

"Suzanne, I see that you wrote a very detailed post of your perception of the experience of having us in your home. We will not be returning so that should put your mind to rest. This was our first and probably our last Airbnb experience. I feel as if you did not speak your mind while we were there and instead decided to post it in your review. Thank you for the feedback, I will keep these things in mind if I ever do decide to stay in an Airbnb location again. I think that in the future you need to post how loud people can talk on the phone and the times you want no noise at all in the evenings. I apologize for any pen marks on your blanket, I was not aware that had happened when my daughter wrote her note. As a result, I also believe that you should not allow children in your home period because I do not think that a person like yourself can tolerate unexpected accidents like these. I think you did state that in your original requirements of stay that you did not allow children. So, yes I do believe that you should stick to that. I do agree that my dog was not socialized to you but you did not necessarily state that as a strict requirement either. Just to make it known to you, my dog is very socialized to those living in our neighborhood and with the people and animals at the dog park. However, I would agree that she may need more training. She is just over a year old so you may need to specify your expectation of dog age and behavior in your home and how trained the animals should be. I do believe that you tried to be accommodating but as evidenced by your feedback were not very sincere. I know that you intended to post a very specific and honest post. Overall, your home is very cute and nicely staged. However, your couch looked like it needed a good cleaning and had various stains already on it as well that looks like you tried to get out. I Apologize that my dog briefly walked on your stained couch. I allow her on the furniture at my home but my couch has scotch guard impregnated in the fabric and it is easy to clean. I apologize for the peed rug, again I am still training her as well. I immediately told you what had happened and you took care of it. In your post, you make it sound like this is something that you discovered after I left. However, you know that the carpet in the bedroom already had visible stains on it when we arrived which I accepted because you have identified your home as a dog-friendly home. I assumed that you would be forgiving for that instance. So, that probably needs a better cleaning as well. I also apologize for leaving your backdoor unlocked. I remember locking it several times but I have a daughter and it could have happened without my knowledge. On a more positive note, Thank you for the movie tickets and books. My daughter and her cousins have enjoyed the books. Also, thank you very much for providing us the dog kennel for our dog. I think that you meant well and I may need to have my dog better trained before traveling again."

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Emilia42 

I wouldn't be too put off by her response. But I love how she blames her daughter as if she's not the responsible parent who should be teaching her daughter valuable lessons like locking a door or not to use the bed as a desk.

She's more involved with her dog and her requirement of Scotchguard!

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Suzanne302 

You can live with private feedback, it does no harm... she had the rant she needed.

You do need to change your house rules though. This made me laugh! :

 my dog is very socialized to those living in our neighborhood and with the people and animals at the dog park. However, I would agree that she may need more training. She is just over a year old so you may need to specify your expectation of dog age and behavior in your home and how trained the animals should be.

...I allow her on the furniture at my home

You need to have a clause explaining that badly behaved dogs need bring their preferred friends with them and an additional appropriate charge will be made for them 😄 

Yes, Entitled.

ALSO !

You snoozed your listing.... Might that have prevented the guest review around the 14 day period ??

[Suzanne302]

@Ian-And-Anne-Marie0 

Haha! Yes, that really made me laugh. A socialized dog doesn't like just specific people. And when my rules say "house trained" it means "house trained" not "in training and still having accidents"! So confused as to why that wasn't clear to her. I think my expectations were very clear!

Snoozing a listing doesn't prevent former or upcoming guests from viewing it, or prevent a guest from leaving a review. Otherwise, that could come in handy if you don't want a guest to review you!

[Lisa723]

@Suzanne302 I think it was a foregone conclusion that this guest was going to feel blindsided by your review, and she did. C'est la vie. Hopefully she'll do better in future shared spaces.

[Suzanne302]

@Lisa723 

100% agree! I knew she was going to be blindsided. But she only stayed two nights, so can you imagine how awkward it would have been for me to point out each of her transgressions as they happened? I would have been nagging her non-stop. Please do this. Don't do this. Could you please not do that? Your dog is not socialized or trained so you need to leave...

She would have been pissed about her stay and as a host I'm not sorry that I'd rather blindside a guest than to risk a bad review.

[Sarah977]

@Suzanne302  I get it. Didn't realize she was only there for 2 nights. Most of what she did really shouldn't have to be pointed out to guests anyway if they are people who understand how to be respectful of shared spaces, and take responsibility for their pets.

I have zero patience for these dog owners who make absurd excuses for their lack of training. A year old dog is the equivalent in people years of a 7 year old child. No longer a "puppy" or an "infant", still young and full of energy, but no longer to be excused from squatting and peeing on the floor.

[Kelly149]

@Sarah977 @Suzanne302 but this is why I don't allow animals in my space anymore (I know that's part of your market Suzanne....)

bc a dog who would NEVER pee in the house at his home, walks into my house that smells like different people and different animals and suddenly NEEDS to add himself to the mix, or maybe he's so freaked out from the car or the walls being the wrong color or who knows what and there you go, freak out tinkle on my rug. And all the lousy human thinks is 'well, that's weird, he never does that at home!'. Well of course he doesn't! He lives there and he's used to it.

And you're completely right! You certainly couldn't correct her while she was there or all that complaining would have gone in a public review instead of a private email. And you weren't allowed to cancel her bc abb has decided that is bad (booking for a child against your rules). So, abb got the svc fee from this booking, but you like them a little less after this stay and she likes abb a little less after this stay. So who exactly wins when ABB thinks price and occupancy should drive all decisions?? It's a bad business plan.

[Sarah977]

@Kelly149  The dog comment has some validity, but I can tell you I have had dogs all my life and taken them with me on many journeys and never have any of them relieved themselves indoors, even in a strange place. And a responsible dog owner will make sure to walk the dog more often when travelling, to eliminate the urge to pee because it's in unfamiliar surroundings. A dog will generally do whatever it is allowed to do at home, a dog brain can't distinguish that it's allowed to sleep on the sofa and bed at home, but not elsewhere, even if it's told "No!"  Dog owners who want to be allowed to have their dog with them in accomodations they book while travelling need to train them not to do those things which won't be acceptable in other's homes. i.e. never allow them to get up on the furniture from the time they're a puppy, not jump up on people, not dig holes in the yard.  Likewise, I think those dogs that have accidents inside also have them at home, in spite of the owner claiming "That's weird, he's never done that before." Ten to one that dog is left in the house all day and the owner uses "pee pads", which a find a bizarre concept, or the owner often deals with urine at home, they'd just never admit it. "Oh yeah, he pees on the carpets at home, too" is something you're never going to hear. 

[Sarah977]

@Suzanne302  I just love how she excuses her dog peeing on the rug with the dog being still in training. A year old dog is way too old to be having accidents in the house, unless it's not taken out for walks often enough. And then it's all okay and you must be used to it, because you accept pets, so what's a bit of dog pee? And she told you right away and "you took care of it", as if it's part of your normal job to deal with dog urine on your rugs.

I don't think she trashed you or your place in her response, she just felt the need to defend herself.

I would urge you in the future, though, to not bite your tongue when guests are behaving inappropriately for a shared space. If they're just staying overnight, fine, let it go and only mention in the review, but a longer stay than that, I think it's important to speak up right away if people are oblivious. "Excuse me, XX, but I wonder if you could speak a bit more quietly on the phone when you're in the shared spaces?" "Excuse me, XX, I realize your dog may be accustomed to getting on the couch in your own home, but I don't allow dogs on the furniture here."

[Ann72]

@Suzanne302 I don't agree that the woman's message to you was polite or civilized.  She was all over the place, first in high dudgeon saying she'd never use Airbnb again, then saying she might use your feedback if she uses Airbnb again, blaming her daughter as others have mentioned (WTF), blaming you for being polite and not a harpy, trying hard not to reveal how entitled, passive-aggressive, and immature she is and not succeeding.  It's the classic strategy of a toxic narcissist who wants you to feel bad for revealing the flaws she spends her whole life trying not to see.  You clearly often think of what others need because you posted this to let other in-home hosts know that they might be in for an uncomfortable and disappointing hosting experience.  DON'T FEEL BAD.  YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON!  🙂

[Suzanne302]

@Ann72 

Thanks for making me feel better! 🙂

It's amazing how I can have 50+ 5-star reviews with multiple people saying staying with me was their best ABB experience ever, yet all that is out the window because all I can focus on is her private message to me pointing out a stupid water stain on the couch and a stain on the rug (which is an old stain that usually starts to come back up about 6 months after I get the carpet cleaned). I'm mad at her for making me doubt my own place and hospitality!

[Ann72]

@Suzanne302 Darling, I've been there (in other areas of my life)!  That's what toxic people do.  And we can keep them out of our personal lives, but not always out of our professional lives.  It's not easy to shrug off when you would never even think of treating another person like that, but as Michelle Obama said, when they go low, we go high.  And stay there.  🙂

[Jennifer1039]

I’m confused, I thought a guest could not see your review unless they reviewed you as well??

[Suzanne302]

@Jennifer1039 

Both host and guest have 14 days to review. If the host writes a review, the guest cannot see the review until they write one of their own, or until the 14-day review period expires. At that point, the review becomes public, but the guest cannot write a review. And vice versa.

Reviews will always be public after 14 days.

In the case of this guest, she sent me a message after the review posted because she was upset with my review.