Terrible Guest Reaction to Review

[Nicole372]

This is a record of a post-review conversation with a guest who did not take too kindly to the review I gave him. He's been reported to Airbnb for his hostility and abusiveness. Let's see if they take action...

Him:

Thanks for the nice and fair review Nicole! 1) I didn’t know we had any explanation to give you as far as what we were doing with our days, whether we spend them outside or in the room we paid for. 2) Pot is not a drug. It’s a plant, perfectly legal in California. Drugs come in a little orange plastic bottle and you seem to be full of them. What you are doing is called discrimination. 3) How dare you say we left the bathroom other than SPARKLING CLEAN? We made sure to clean after us everytime we used it and furthermore, how can you be sure it was us and none of the other guests? You work all day and unless you have cameras in the bathroom, you have no clue who did what. I could go on about your inhospitality, cold attitude the moment we met, the fact that I had to sleep on an air mattress for a week when we paid for two beds in a room, without any complaint. Yet I kept all that stuff for me and left a nice short positive review. In much simpler words, we have no lesson whatsoever to receive from an overweight, pick-up driving, single, greedy bitch like you. We don’t do drugs unlike a lotta members of your needle loving family (Yes, David is a great guy and he also talks a lot) and we certainly won’t be insulted and treated unfairly by an old tired (racist?) hag like you.

Him:

You stink of ignorance and intolerance. Nobody is really expecting you to make sense and be fair but I won’t allow you to question our cleanliness and respect of other people’s belongings. You are at the end of the day nothing but a clueless american suburban woman who loves money and donuts a little too much. Learn to look at yourself before judging other people who otherwise respected you, people who have been all around the world and never had any trouble with anyone but your narrow-minded intolerant fat behind.

Him:

If you aren’t mentally ready to have people who paid their money to be in your house, you shouldn’t be on airbnb. Or just let David handle everything, he seems to be way more fit for the job than you could ever hope to be.

Me:

[Name Omitted], Autocorrect can be so tricky, can’t it? Here’s what I think you were trying to say, “Nicole, my apologies for being less than model guests. Thank you for not canceling our reservation due to our violation of your no drug policy. While marijuana may be legal in California, we did not respect your house rules by bringing it into your house. I know it was a terrible first impression to meet on your front porch at 5 am when you had to walk through our cloud of pot smoke to get to your truck. “The next time we stay at an Airbnb, we will be sure to clean our facial hair from the sink and wipe our feet before entering the house so that we may leave the shared areas as clean as possible for other guests.” Thanks for being understanding.

Him:

Yeah especially when you talk crap. That’s exactly what I thought, you think you are running a high-tech factory with robots coming in and out of it. Just as we don’t owe you any type of explanation regarding what we do with our days, having marijuana or not is none of your business, let alone a matter of respect. You might have grown up in an old time where brainwash concerning pot was heavy but again this is 2019 and California, not Afghanistan. If someone has some ibuprofen, is he disrespecting you for not telling you he is bringing it into your home? I bet you don’t even realize how silly you sound. You are just a bitter old woman Nicole, that’s it. Again we have been all around this planet and never have we encountered so much sass, negativity and plain intolerance than with overweight pre menopause bitches like you. You were probably just walking around, looking for a reason to **bleep** on us, which you think we gave you.

Him:

If you don’t want people walking with their shoes in the house, which no matter how much you wipe them, are always gonna be dirty, you do like normal people and you add a no shoe rule. It’d perfectly understandable and anywhere I went where it was the rule I had no problem with the hosts. Don’t come complaining, weeks later, about something you never specified in the first place.

Him:

You are an aging ugly fat woman Nicole, and it’s only getting worse for you. We are young graduated travelers from across the world with all the freedom in the world. Of course you were gonna hate us.

Him:

Truth is hard to hear and you were neither designed or conditioned to hear it, but this is exactly what you are Nicole. A hateful greedy bitch.

Him:

You should have just canceled our reservation the first day, if we were that outrageous and if you wanted to be coherent with yourself. Don’t take our money and then **bleep** on us weeks later , it doesn’t make sense. I wonder if they ever thought you this, wherever you received your «education » but you can’t have your cake and eat it too. Either you deal with people’s presence in your house or you don’t. While some don’t smoke weed, it doesn’t give you the right to discriminate those who do for the simple reason that its neither illegal or done in the house. You might not like it but if you are gonna rent rooms in California you can’t tell people not to smoke, especially if they don’t do it in the house.

Him:

People like you are disappearing quickly from the surface of this earth and it’s a good thing. Your mentality is dated. As dated as your ovaries. I could go on educating your ignorant cellulosic fat ass all day but this is enough. You will think twice before crapping on people next time, or even having them in your house. Not everyone spends the whole day out and doesn’t smoke weed. That doesn’t make those who do bad people. Have a good day.

Although what he wrote is extremely offensive, most of it is laughable. Personal insults, claiming racism and discrimination? That's funny. I'm allowed to make and enforce any house rules that I choose. Despite California's view on marijuana, in the great state of David and Nicole's property, it is unwanted and not allowed.

I am slightly concerned with the whole "people like you are disappearing" comment. What exactly is he trying to say there? Should I be concerned that he would return to our property?

I hope his extensive world travels have taken him far from California, and our house in particular. We've been pleasantly surprised at the number of wonderful guests that we have hosted while on Airbnb, but this reaction to a review makes me wonder about our safety and possible retaliation that involves more than words.

[Niel3]

Why feed the fire by entertaining & replying to his first message? He obviously wants to have the last word so best thing here would have just ignored him and his initial response and got on with life rather than have a protracted and largely irrelevant argument.

[Tracey207]

👍

[Nicole372]

While I appreciate your feedback, the past is the past and what was said has been said. I wanted to ensure that if Airbnb reviewed the conversation after I reported him, Airbnb would see who was attacking whom. Going forward with this and other reservations, I will heed your advice. More importantly we have an issue of what feels like a threat.

[Julie143]

I read the review you wrote about him. It seemed factual and rational sounding. His reaction is completely over the top and frankly, misogynistic.

If I were a single woman hosting private rooms, I would never want to have him in my house. He sounds absolutely creepy.

Based on his rant and his profile, I’d say say “people like you” means Western women who dare to question his male authority. I took it not so much as direct threat against you specifically, but more like history will favor people like him. (Men from his part of the world, maybe?)

I hope Airbnb will apply their anti discrimination standards to him. He made derogatory comments about your gender, nationality, age, weight and marital status. 

Also: Wonder what his issue is with women driving trucks?

[Nicole372]

Thank you for your reply.

I try to be fair when writing reviews, and I know I could have gone into further detail of their behavior, but David, my boyfriend (I'm not single) requested that I was easy on him. I write the reviews so that other hosts have an idea of what they are getting into when they accept the reservation. I feel like protecting the community of good hosts is what is most important.

I did see something new after I wrote the review that had an option of editing it for the first 48 hours after a review is submitted. I don't know if that time has elapsed yet, but should I add his reaction to the review, or leave well-enough alone?

PS: My truck is a work truck and is a monster. Not my choice of vehicle.

[John1080]

@Nicole372, if he's already submitted his review, even within the 48-hour window, you cannot edit yours. I'd leave it alone and just move on, deleting and not responding to those sorts of private messages from irate people in the future. Hopefully, this will be the one and only time! 

[Mark116]

I'm not sure you can ban guests from bringing marijuana into your house since it is legal in your state.  You can ban them from smoking anything on your property, either inside or outside, but that's it.

I don't blame you for feeling threatened by this guest, his repeated derogatory physical references as well as his use of slurs and general angry tone is very troubling.  Good luck.   

[Darva1]

In the same way that you can ban people from wearing shoes in your house, you can ban them from bringing drugs or alcohol - even though they are legal. It's your home - you can make any rules you wish to make, and guests shouldn't choose to stay with you if they don't agree to your rules. 

[John1080]

@Nicole372 and @Mark116, I am not sure of the ability to ban someone from 'bringing' it onto the premises, but you can certainly ban guests from using marijuana just as with cigarettes, as marijuana users are not a protected class and preventing smoking of anything is certainly not discrimination. And of course, if they are carrying it with them, they are probably smoking it, as "a cloud of marijuana smoke" was mentioned at one point in the conversation. 

Let's see what Airbnb does with regards to the name calling here. He should be banned from the platform. 

[Nicole372]

@Mark116 and @John1080, perhaps restricting someone from bringing marijuana into the house is not a reasonable request, but what if the odor is so strong that you can smell it outside of their room? I had to check in other guests during the reservation in question and when showing them the bathroom, the odor was so strong I couldn't tell if it was just present or if he was smoking inside the room. I don't want other guests to get the idea that we tolerate that behavior.

[Mark116]

@Nicole372  I don't have a good answer, the best I can come up with is to make sure your no smoking policy is as comprehensive as possible, put it in the rules that there is no smoking of anything, cigarettes, vapes, marijunana,  inside the house or anywhere else on the property if it isn't already there.  That might discourage people who want to smoke weed from booking.  

I also can't see the review of this guest or his review, and the reviews on your listings are also showing in a strange way, I wonder if airbnb has already done something here?

[John1080]

@Nicole372, I think it's perfectly reasonable. If they're bringing it in, they're most likely smoking it on the premises. I agree completely, and although I don't specifically mention marijuana on my listing, I do mention smoking all over the place, which I think most also understand includes marijuana. 

Your house, your rules. Marijuana smokers are not a protected class and by violating your rules, they have greatly disrespected you, not the other way around. 

[Ben551]

@Nicole372  all kinds of smoke "cling" to clothing though.  Cigarette smoke is the same.  If someone is a smoker, even if they do it elsewhere, you will be able to smell it on them (in quite a wide radius around them).  It won't matter if it's cigarettes or marijuana.  It will also rub off onto your pillows and bedding while they sleep, because it clings to hair and clothing.  We had guests that smoked outside, as instructed, but they stank the bed up.  They brought it back to the room on their very pijamas.

There is only so much you can do to prevent this. To some extent, it's part of being a willing participant in an accomodation business.  Some people... just stink. 

The alternative is to ban all types of smokers from even booking your property.

[Zacharias0]

I couldnt find the review you left for him so this whole conversation lacks context and it went off the rails pretty fast. I couldnt even finish reading it because it was all in such bad taste and very elementary. I wasnt sure I was reading the comment section of a political post on the internet or a forum for Airbnb hosts. Regardless of who was right and who was wrong you cant stoke the fire and expect Airbnb to come to the rescue and ban the guest. Even if he robbed you blind, lacking a supbonea, there isnt much they would do to reprimand or ban the guest.