Can't help feeling despondent at times as a host

[Isabelle3]

Feeling slightly low after a very ordinary guest review when I went well above expectations, offering my best 25 years australian wine, lending best books, cooking, laundering, showering kids with gifts.... Yey amongst all my 5 stars ratings these the guests gave me 4 stars.  

You think you've made friends but it's fleeting and this experience pulls me down.  There is no pleasing some people and I feel this rating particularly harsh in the circumstances.  Sorry, I know I probably invest too much emotionally and pride wise.  🙂 for me it's much more than business, I give it my all.  

Does anyone else feel the sting of unfairness at times?  Ratings are all very well but so subjectives

[Robin4]

@Sara2....Oh, Sara. I wish I could somehow wave a magic wand and make it better for you! I guess what I want to say to you is, you must have a gimmick.....something that will make a potential guest want to pick your house instead of your competitors!

I have a humble little cottage behind the main house, that the roof had fallen in on when we bought this place in 2009. It's in a very unspectacular place called Mt Barker in the Adelaide hills in Sth Aust....Mt what, you say!!! On the surface it has very little to attract the average guest. Although it is fully self contained, I have to list it as a 'Private Room' to satisfy council regulations....once again limiting my guest appeal. Sara....It is not a tree house on the Serenghetti! It is not a chalet at St Moritz, It's not a luxury yacht on the Mediterranean, but bloody hell, have I, and my cottage had any success with Airbnb! And I think I have had that success because I go far beyond what any guest expects they will receive. As well as a mass of food I even put a few beers and a few apple ciders in the fridge, chocolates on the bedside tables and so on, all on a complimentary basis. Nearly everyone who books now makes a point of saying...'after reading your reviews we are coming to S.A. for, something or other, and have decided we would like to stay in your cottage'! One woman this morning even said she cried when she read our latest review and response about the dog!

Sara, that's my gimmick, I do what Airbnb was set up to do, I 'host'! I do make every guests stay spectacular, and today we got our 'Superhost' badge, all inside 6 months. Sure it costs a bit to provide all these extras but there are canny ways to shop and I would never spend more than about 6% of the hosting fee on incidentals. Some times I will buy two cartons of beer when there is a two for one offer, and stuff like that.

Sara, find your strengths and emphasise them, make that pool of guests realise they will miss something special if they pass you by.

Hey, chin up Sara and look for that something that will set you apart from the ordinary....and I promise you, the bookings will come!

Cheers.....Rob

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Robin, I always ask my guests why they choose for AIRBNB instead of Hotel stay. NONE ever said it was about being hosted. ALL said.... it's cheaper and more benefits. In hotels when nothing to do, sit in lounge having any drink... you pay. But. in ABB they expect all this to be  free. It's all about benefits and not at all about being hosted. It's all about cheap and being served for free.

[Robin4]

@Maryam-Al-Fakheer0 Gosh Maryam, I am so sorry that has been your experience. More than 50% of my past guests I have become friends with, and remain in contact with! And even though I have only been doing this for 6 months, some guests are travelling from other states to stay here again. I have not come across one who said they did not give a rats about the 'hosting'....In fact quite the opposite, they all say they are returning because of the hosting. I even had one woman this morning who said she cried when she read my last guest review and my response about our dog!

Gee, you seem to have been dealt a hard blow when it comes to guests, and from your posts you almost sound 'bitter' about them. I wish your luck could change and you could get a few good ones. But Maryam, I am sure in this life you 'reap what you sow' and if your attitude is indiferent to your guests, theirs will be indiferent to you!

Incidentally Maryam, we did get that 'Superhost' status today...all in six months, and most of our booking requests now tell us they are booking because of the reviews....and the effort I put in....Cheers....Rob

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Robin4, you are jumping into conclusions. In my previous message I mentioned the answers of my guests to the question WHY they book on AIRBNB instead of a hotel.   I have mostly great guests, I have more than super reviews. Indeed, I reap what I sow. 
What made you think I am indifferent to my guests????  I have great contacts with some of my previous guests, some even sending parcels with toys and cloths for some children of the poor community in my village. All because they had such a great time with me in my village and meetings with locals. 

Give it a try and read the reviews I have before you jump into any conclusions.  It is not for nothing than I am at all times at 1st, 2nd and 3rd place in the Petra region.

But the fact remains that a lot of guests expect a lot for free in a listing with a very small price, knowing that there is NOTING for free at a hotel, not even a glass of water. 

[Robin4]

@Maryam-Al-Fakheer0.....

Hi again Maryam, That is great that you have good guests and experiences as well! Maryam....talk about them! We, as a hosting community want to hear about the good as well as the not so good.

Let’s hear some good things, you obviously make amazing food and have a lovely house but…all your posts that I have read are about problems…I, or someone else would mention a positive comment, and you would come back with a negative comment…. Americans just eating all the food and not sharing! “Hand shakes or hugs doesn't mean a thing. Guests can smile in your face, saying that it was great and still give you a louzy review or lower stars”, or “NONE ever said it was about being hosted. ALL said.... it's cheaper and more benefits. In hotels when nothing to do, sit in lounge having any drink... you pay. But. in ABB they expect all this to be  free”.

Maryam, the thing that helps a lot of ‘newcomers’ to this community is to hear good positive (and funny) stories, it gives them something to take on board. @Isabelle3 from Leura and Sara from London are finding it a bit hard at the moment, and I would love to in some way give both of them a hand…..but I can’t, all I can do is offer them words. The worst thing I could do for either of them is to tell them their guests are nothing more than a bunch of ‘freeloaders’!!!

Maryam, I don’t want to offend you but, when I am trying constructively to help someone….’cut me a bit of slack’ hey!! Cheers…..Rob.

[Kelly3]

@Maryam-Al-Fakheer0

I find Maryam's way of comforting very helpful to fellow hosts when they feel under appreciated and hurt by guests.

She is simply ellaborating the facts which could help those hosts to get over that one (or few) bad incident and keep smile to next guests.

I do think being aware of possible negative guests and knowing that it is not you(host), it could be them(guests), and some people are simply not a good fit with the host/listing. 

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Kelly @Robin4  Thank you for your support and understanding. @Robin, I understand your point. However, I do believe that we not only learn from success stories, but even more from the honest stories with less great experiences. I know I am blunt and speak my mind. 

Most success stories are from very privilaged hosts with great houses, great locations and  surrounded with all sort of luxery and comfort  which are available in all stores in their cities and often with enough time and funds to pamper their guests with all sort of extra's, including bottles of wine. 

It is a different story if you host from another country, with a totally different culture, in a remote desert area in the most poor part of a poor country with very limited resources and supplies, hosting tourists who come for just 1 or 2 days trying to get the maximum out of everything after paying high prices in this country for entrance fee's of the Petra Park, high costs for drivers, visa, etc.  And thus spending as little as possible on food and accommodations here. Those guests have most likely a different attitude than the guests you probably host, Robin.

I have to host with extreme limited (or none) funds for the smalest prices to give the maximum to my guests. 

[Robin4]

@Maryam-Al-Fakheer0 And hello yet again...Yes Maryam, I should have thought of that, and that was stupid of me! Of course it is much harder for you to provide the experience you would like because you just don't have an abundance of resources where you are....but your food does look amazingly delicious, and I am absolutely sure you do the best that you can, and I can see it would break your heart puting in so much with so little, and not getting the praise you no doubt deserve.

It's all very well for me, I don't need this for a living, I am retired, and I just do it because I love meeting people. I guess (to a certain extent) the cost is irrelevant, although as I said before I never spend more than about 5-6% of the tariff I ask on any particular guest.

But please forgive me for taking you to task over something that you are no doubt fighting just like a lot of other hosts, and you are right, we do need to learn from the bad experiences because, sooner or later we are all going to have one, and it is best to be forewarned.

Thanks Maryam....Cheers....Rob

[Maryam-Al-Fakheer0]

@Robin4 Thanks for understanding.  About the food, those dishes (dinner) often takes about 3 hrs cooking, but most of the times tourists prefer to buy a sandwich for 0,50 US$ rather than pay 5US$ for a home cooked large meal, and ofcourse take bottled mineral water from my fridge without pay.  

It happened also a couple of times that in evening guests asked me to heat up the left over tea from breakfast for them, so not to spend anything. Sorry, but this is disgusting to me. 

And sure, I also have success stories, 1 guest left me her rain coat, another left me her Mocca coffee maker. A student invited me for dinner out and a lady left me a nice note with 5 JD (7 US$) in the room. 

[Carmen-And-Jim0]

Then TELL them all of these fees. I have also seen you be so negative  to responds and to be honest if I when to Petra i would book your place in a heartbeat. I love your place and I would love to book your place on my world wide adventure, knowing it is remote, knowing that I have to abide by cultural rules.

But to be  honest most Americans that travel to Petra are rich, THE Americans that travel off non tourist sites are pain in the freakin ass folks that can't afford a adventure when they really would want a ritz.  Poor little ol me can't afford  high end and you best believe I would give you 5 stars.

If I am ever in your region I will book with you.

There is always a dream to travel. If ever in Miami you are always welcomed.

[Carmen-And-Jim0]

I get dinged almost every time with location, I really can't move my house so I have become used to this. I clearly spell it out to every guest that I am not close to downtown or south beach and to be fair South Beach is at least 45 mins just crossing 395 on a weekend about 2 hours on special events.

I still get the folks that want the keys ding me on location... because I am not near South Beach!!!!! Ugh. I can not win, I am either close to one tourist spot or not, at least I am honest about not being near one.

[Sara2]

@Robin4thanks Robin 

i do go the extra mile if I can

took an Australian guest to a footie match for free £66 ticket more than his room but I got it free

and now I am giving a French intern English lessons only 30 minutes a day

but I enjoy that and only do it if the guests are nice

having said that I learnt the hard way you can't please everyone as my first ABB guest was a nightmare that I refused an extexsion but thanks for kind words sara

[Robin4]

@Sara2....I would be apalled if he didn't at least buy you a drink after the match....I would buy you a bloody good meal!!

I am sure there are great things around the corner for Sara...Cheers...Rob

[Andrew-Nicolás-And-Tania0]

Hi Isabelle,

Try not to get discouraged. This has happened to us and we have realized that almost everything in the rating system is really subjective. Do it because you love to do so and not because you want good feedback. When you do special things for others without expectations you enjoy it more. Of course for all of us (hosts) reviews are what makes a difference for being chosen or not by a guest BUT you can't really change how people react to what you do. Make sure you always do your best and be happy with that knowledge.

Now, a question for all... We've been hosting for a year and a half now but, as far as we know, you can't the star rating a particular guest just gave you, only what you wrote. Has this change??

Best to everyone! May this be an amazing 2016 for us all! 🙂

[Nancy2]

You can, sort of...  Before your next guest look at your dashboard and the number of 5 star, 4 star ect. in each category. 

Then when your next guest leaves a review look at your dashboard again and you can determine how they rated you in each category if you compare it to the numbers you had before their stay.

Hope that makes sense!