Guest sneaks in friend into single room, how can I make them pay?

[Terence4]

Hello, I have seen this topic has been kind of addressed but not recently and with Airbnb changing rules etc all the time I'd like to discuss this:  We have a guest room with a single bed and last night our guest forgot her key to the flat.  She came home at 2am waking us up knocking at the door.   We opened and discovered she was sneaking in a friend.  It was a sneak because the friend actually hid away from the door.  Because it was 2am and we had to work the next morning we didn't make a fuss in the night.  However, it left us troubled and we could not fall back asleep.  We can accommodate 2 people via pulling out the bed and providing more linen, but the guest needs to book 2 people.  I just altered the reservation and asked for the extra $30. 

So far, hours later, the guest has ignored the message.  Can Airbnb make her pay?  What would you suggest I do?  I actually would like her to leave my flat, she's got three nights left, but if she realizes her mistake and pays for the extra guest then she can stay.  I just do not feel comfortable and disrespected.  If this was a whole flat she was renting fine, but it's a room only and we are here. 

Thanks for any advice. 

[Robin4]

@Terence4 

OK Terence, a couple of things to consider here.

She did the wrong thing here, she tried to sneak someone else in. It is not in your rules that you don't allow 2 people...just that you like to know so you can charge and prepare appropriately...great!

If by chance she hadn't forgotten her key and tip-toed in a 2.00am you would have been none the wiser as whether there was one or two people in that room and she (in your eyes)  would still have been that fine guest with no issue. You, afterall, didn't have to do that extra preparation for the second guest...did you?.

So two ways to handle this....

A/..... Make an issue of this,  request additional money mention the house rules, embarrass the guest and assure yourself of a bad review! Not something a Superhost with 90+ reviews seriously wants to do I would think!

B/..... Quietly pull the guest aside and say..."Hey I didn't want to make a big deal of it, and I hope you had a good night, but please, if you are going to do it again, as you are here for 3 nights, can you at least pay for the second guest. That way I can get out extra towels and try to make it comfortable for you both. Are you ok with that"! 

Now Terence you are not out anything really, and that way you and the guest stay on good terms and you actually earn that Superhost badge that you have got.

Terence, hosting is about hospitality, there are times to be strong and rigid, and there are times to bend a little. That is what sorts out the good hosts from the 'also rans'.

I am sorry if you have gone too far with this, as it sounds like you might have if the guest is ignoring your demand for an extra 30. It could be that you may have shot yourself in the foot here! If it's not too late try offering her an olive branch to get this hosting back on track again.

Although you say you would like her to leave, you feel 'disrespected'....if she pays the $30 she can stay. By saying that, what you are saying is there is a price on that disrespect...you are prepared to be disrespected for 30 bucks!!

Can you understand what I am saying Terence?

Cheers......Rob

[Terence4]

Thanks for your reply, Rob.  It's not the $30 bucks I am after, it's her being disrespectful.  She was trying to sneak the friend in, otherwise, the friend would have not hidden.  She didn't even apologize for waking us up.  Of course, if I had not noticed, but we did and that creates a different picture.  I did not confront her while her friend was here, and I have not seen her this morning, but I will try and talk to her when I see her next.  I am angry about how disrespectful and rude guests can be in someone else's home.  Also, Airbnb states: 

Airbnb Terms of Use, item 8.3.3:

"8.3.3 You may not bring any additional individuals to an Experience, Event or other Host Service unless such an individual was added by you as an additional guest during the booking process on the Airbnb Platform."

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Terence4 

 I am angry about how disrespectful and rude guests can be in someone else's home.  Also, Airbnb states: 

Airbnb Terms of Use, item 8.3.3:

I'm completely with you on this Terence.

What really annoys me is when experienced hosts make rules then just don't stick to them. It's no wonder that guests become 'entitled' to take advantage of hosts. They learn their entitlement somewhere.

"Oh its only $20.. $30..$40..." - So why not just give your accomodation away free to your first guest as well ?! It is the disrespect and it is the money!

Breaking House Rules has consequencies. The tools to deal with this are available and more hosts should use them.

And don't refund...

[Terence4]

Hi there, I am so glad to read this.  I have a feeling that lots of hosts bend backwards for their guests just for a lousy review.  Yes, breaking rules have got consequences.  I have not seen my guest all day and she's not messaged me or accepted the payment request for her guest.   What am I left with to do now?  Lesson learnt I will never accept an alteration after check-in again.  If a guest wants to leave earlier because their plans have changed....it's their problem.  The current guest ruined my kindness for the future guests, it's sad. 

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Terence4 

Hi there, I am so glad to read this.  I have a feeling that lots of hosts bend backwards for their guests just for a lousy review.  Yes, breaking rules have got consequences.  I have not seen my guest all day and she's not messaged me or accepted the payment request for her guest.   What am I left with to do now?  Lesson learnt I will never accept an alteration after check-in again.  If a guest wants to leave earlier because their plans have changed....it's their problem.  The current guest ruined my kindness for the future guests, it's sad. 

Something @Robin4 said:

Now Terence you are not out anything really, and that way you and the guest stay on good terms and you actually earn that Superhost badge that you have got.

RUBBISH !

Terence, you have already earned your Superhost badge, you have already bent over backwards, you will most likely do this again and again because you have proven this already, you do not NEED more Superhost. You always will be because it's in your persona. In this situation the Guest is blatantly taking advantage and being disrespectful.

It is wrong that in this situation you will end up being blackmailed by the Airbnb system because of a guest being dishonest and disrespectful. You, as a host should not be put in this position where asserting your rights, adhering to your house rules and affirming your security that Airbnb should allow a guest to submit a retalitory review. Simply, because they broke house rules that benefit should be removed from them.

@Terence4 You said you made a reservation change for your additional guest fee. Thats the right thing to do. I may have done it slightly different. Airbnb are evidence hungry. They will pit you against your guest and require evidence that there was another guest. Do you have CCTV... Photos... DNA! Or even a message? I would have messaged your guest, "Hi GUEST, we saw you had an additional guest last night not on your reservation, will she be staying for the remainder of your stay or shall I just make a reservation change for one night? If she's staying again, let me know and I'll put out some extra bedding for you for the pull out bed". If she didnt reply at least when you next saw her you could easily broach the subject and add to your message "Thanks for confirmation GUEST I'll add those other three nights right now. I've pulled out the bed and left the extra bedding". You may even, hopefully get a reply from the GUEST.

This hurts:

@Terence4 

The current guest ruined my kindness for the future guests, it's sad. 

[Robin4]

@Ian-And-Anne-Marie0 

Ian...or Anne-Marie, always a bit difficult when you don't know who you are addressing!

We all host in our own way, what works for me will not necessarilly for someone else but, I simply know what has got me to over 320 reviews over the past two and a half years on a couple of platforms (221 of them here on Airbnb with a 93% 5 star rating) so all I am trying to pass on is what I find works best. I am not saying that what I do is correct any more than what you do is correct....I just know it works and I don't think it does the CC any good for one contributor to criticise another contributors experience as 'RUBBISH'' ! We are here to help each other not belittle each other!

Cheers.....Rob

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Robin4 

It's Ian. Thanks for your contributions.

[Robin4]

@Ian-And-Anne-Marie0 

Ian, thanks....you do a great job, your contributions are fantastic and the wonderful thing about the Community Centre is, we are a family, we really do reach out to each other and try to help in any way we can.

I left the CC and spent the best part of a year in support a year or so ago. This is the sort of thing we had to put up with.....

I won't say this was a daily occurence, but they all had a problem and most of them were angry! A few nights I logged off, went down to Ade and said..."I am not going to log on tomorrow"!

We don't face that here, and that is why I came back here, we can give advice, it may not always be right but, it's part of a jigsaw that ultimately helps. There are posts of yours Ian that I don't agree with, but by God, I will never criticise you for making them!

Cheers.....Rob

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Robin4 

There are posts of yours Ian that I don't agree with, but by God, I will never criticise you for making them!

Feel completely free. Beat me up. I might change my opinion, or not. But I'll still be your friend in the morning. 🙂

[Terence4]

Hi Ian, you know, it is not about the $ it's simply the fact that she is not a friend who brings in a friend.  She is a stranger to me us who booked a room for herself to stay in. Double bed, pull our or not.  It's a single room and she booked a single stay!  Fullstop!  Then coming in at 2 am and sneaking in a friend is being deceitful and disrespectful.  You cannot let anyone get closer to you then offering a stay in your home and she's not respecting that and our rules.  I reminded her of the rules via a message last night before I went to bed.  She is back in her room, I don't know if alone or not.  She still has not acknowledged any of my messages (the alteration request or the rules) and this is where I cannot wrap my head around.  If this was me, I would be so small and so sorry and apologetic I would dread to come to my host's place.  I don't want to say this seems to be our youth we have to deal with these days, but I am not going to slam all of the millennials.  Because in my reality, this has been the worst experience in my hosting history.  Honestly, I want her to leave my flat.  I don't want a stranger in here that is disrespectful and rude.  I don't want to be the person that she can fool around with, but unfortunately, I cannot grab her neck and throw her out 😉 

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Terence4 I know its about the lies and deceit, another post correlated the deceit to a $ value which was not the case. They're just your published fees.

The fact that you've had no communication is not good.

I'd consider speaking to her directly whilst she's in, (with your partner present if you feel threatened), mention your messages and because you've had no reply you are requesting her to leave tomorrow. If she has somebody with her, ask them both to leave immediately. Confirm your conversation by ABB messages and be around when she leaves, (if that results in being tomorrow.)

Good luck.

[Terence4]

No, we do not have CCTV and I will not report her to Airbnb.  All I am on about is the rudeness and being disrespectful.  We are strangers to another and she is in a private home. She can sneak around in hotels, hostels, and campgrounds, but not in a private, shared home.  I want her to leave, I don't need to put up with her but I cannot physically throw her out.  It bothers me that guests get away with such behaviour and it bothers me that it bothers me 😉  Again, it's happening in my home, in my sanctuary and this is what makes me uncomfortable and angry.  

[Helen3]

If you want her to leave,  why haven't you asked Airbnb to cancel her booking as you feel uncomfortable because she sneaked a guest in at 2 a.m. in the morning @Terence4 

The person she sneaked in could have stolen from you or damaged your home. It is a major breach of trust. Personally I would have asked the uninvited (by you) guest to leave when you found him in your home and contacted Airbnb to ask them to cancel her booking for breaking your house rules and putting your home at risk.

Please leave an honest review so your fellow guests are forewarned.

I don't agre with your analysis that if she pays she is admitting she has made a mistake. If she was to pay it is because she was caught out.

[Terence4]

PS. If she paid for her friend that would show that she knows she made a mistake. But ignoring it, not saying sorry etc...that is where the disrespect comes in. Do you know what I mean?