How would you rate this guest?

[Lucilla14]

Hi everyone! 

I had three people for the last week in one of the guest rooms, and even if they were kind of nice and friendly their stay ended up being a nightmare. They arrived almost 2 hours late without notice and didn't even apologize when they arrived, , on the first morning they woke up at 6 and woke up the other guests in the room being very loud in the kitchen without even closing the door (they started when I kindly ask of them).

They were overall very noisy, woke me up several times speaking loudly very late, or going to the bathroom almost compulsively, on them would go and flush the toilet at least twice Avery hour until 12 p.m, and sometimes in the middle of the night (which is OK if you try to be quiet and don't slam the door! No other guest has ever woke me up in the middle of the night going to the bathroom and it is next my bedroom). They would slam the doors and overall being very annoying!

When they left they were really nice and complimented me and the house, but they left a plastic bag full of clothes and a pair of shoes, I ran after them to get it to them but they told me it was stuff they decided to throw away (why should I do it?... Who knows). The most scary thing is that I discovered when I was cleaning the kitchen that they left on of the fires going, and I am afraid it wasn't the fist time.

So. How do I review them? It was rough but they left the place very clean and were nice, so I don't really know what to write. I don't wanna be rude but I feel I have to do something more than give them few stars. I never wrote a bad review. What would you write? 

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Sarah977 This is not about you.

It is @Lucilla14 who has the issues and her hosting environment and guests are completely different to yours and mine even.

Keeping one guest in check will be far easier than juggling two sets of guests in groups of three and one and unless the rules are clearly pointed out to them of @Lucilla14 ‘s expectations, it would be unfair to judge them based on a perfect guest perception.

@Lucilla14 has mentioned irritations she has, so her expectations need to be communicated and provision made to prevent the noise and toilet door banging banging issues happening again in the future.

If @Lucilla14 doesn’t make a point of stating “no noise after xx.00..” then in a review mentioning such would be unfair to the guests. They would be totally unaware of the acoustics of the apartment and possibly unaware they might be causing an issue.

[Sarah977]

@Ian-And-Anne-Marie0  Did you not read the part where she asked them politely to please close the kitchen door, tone it down, but they continued to slam doors and talk loudly? 

She also said she has not had this problem with previous guests.

That has zero to do with the the host expecting her guests to behave perfectly or not designating quiet hours. These guests simply didn't care.

Of course hosts need to make house rules clear to guests. But they shouldn't have to write a handbook on basic manners and social graces. According to your line of reasoning, if we didn't specifically instruct the guest not to piss all over the toilet seat, we're somehow at fault if they do.

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

No @Sarah977  I didn’t.

I did read this:

...being very loud in the kitchen without even closing the door (they started when I kindly ask of them).

So they were quiet with the door closed when asked.

[Sandra856]

@Ian-And-Anne-Marie0 I have the very opposite experience. My experience is that people in generel is (are) very considerate. Otherwise I most certainly wouldn't be hosting.

I find that it often comes down to culture clashes. What is considered normal in some parts of the world is considered rude and disrespectful in other parts.

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Sandra856 it does entirely depend on the guests. The dynamics between 1,2,3,4,6,8,10+ guests are completely different.

If you expect the worst then better than that is a bonus.

Filtering your guests by any form of discrimination is frowned upon by ABB but by not discriminating you allow all types of guests. Those include noisy, late arrivals, late night toilet users (multiplied by guest quantities).

I suppose a ‘definiton’ of a good guest should be provided to judge all others against, but I haven’t seen that anywhere.

[Sandra856]

@Ian-And-Anne-Marie0 I don't even want to answer whatever it is you are trying to say. You are very rude and

condescending in the way you communicate. And you have been passive-aggressive from the beginning. Not just to me but also to Sarah. 

We were trying to explain how it is to be a host sharing our homes. And you are making fun of it saying we are complaining about people using the toilet at night etc.

My final saying in this is to maybe search the internet in order to understand the big difference between "to discriminate" and "to acknowlegde cultural differences". 

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Sandra856 It’s not about you or I, it’s about @Lucilla14 . She is the one having the problem of unruly guests and the banging of toilet doors...etc. You need to put yourself in @Lucilla14 ‘s position with her hosting arrangements and her challenges.

Either the guests need to be told how to behave via her house rules and her guest expectations or she needs to tell them directly (which would be kind of tough).

@Jim-and-Marcia0 Covered the sound issues well, and you’ll read too that those are issues @Lucilla14 is having and points that I raised.

How you deal with guest problems without mentioning them is beyond me.

[Jessica-and-Henry0]

@Ian-And-Anne-Marie0 

When a guest chooses to stay in a shared home private room listing it is the norm to be respectful of other people in the house. It doesn't matter if it's a single guest or a group of guests. There are things you just DON'T DO when sharing spaces. Why should any host or other guests have to be inconvenienced from rude, selfish and inconsiderate people?

I was taught that slamming doors is unacceptable regardless of whether one is home alone or living with others - imo it's just one of those things that says a lot about one's upbringing. 

From a guest's point of view if I wanted to have the freedom of using the bathroom for as long as I wanted, feel free to cook at all hours, and not have to care about how much noise I make then I would choose to book and stay a private home listing rather than expect others to put up with me.

So why you are trying to make it like as if @Lucilla14 needs to change or improve her listing is beyond me. Your comments are just plain rude and condescending. 

[Moudi1]

Post an honest review! 

Do you know how many guests were super nice and rated me 4 or less over extremely stupid things ! Such as my neighbors dog was barking!

Being nice has nothing to do about the stay ! If they made you feel uncomfortable they don’t deserve a good review no matter how nice they are !

[Jonathan6]

I have a very simple rule I follow when doing a review.  I ask my self would I host them again, if the answer is yes than nothing they did rose to the level of deserving a poor review.  If the answer is no, then you have an obligation to post an honest review.  Maybe things they did would not bother other hosts, but if you wouldn't have them again, then don't reccomend them to me!

[Jim-and-Marcia0 · Accepted solution]

@Lucilla14   I read your post and understand your points. That must have been frustrating for you and the other guests.   

Then I read your listing to gain an understanding of what guests might expect. It appears the information in your listing (at least at the time I read it) doesn't adequately cover all of your expectations and doesn't clearly state key factors that guests need to know when booking your place. So I would start from there.

I see you are offering private rooms in your own home (condominium) with shared spaces (bath and kitchen).  The information in the three listings differ, so you may want to review your information and make it more consistent. Captions on photos would also help, as guests don't always read all the information written in the description.

Noise and quiet hours are not really addressed in your property rules.  So there may be a disconnect between your expectations and those of the guests. Common sense is not common.  I suggest you add a section in your house rules about quiet hours and what you want guests to do maintain the peacefulness of the home. I'd also remove the "Rock & Roll" wall art if you don't want guests to rock'n roll, as it gives a subliminal message.  🙂

Some homes are more insulated for noise than others. Area rugs could help dampen the sounds and would be easy to add to the hard surface floors.   Some guests are early risers and some are night owls. If a person has a private room they might not realize how noise travels in your accommodation.

People need to use the bathroom at all hours, day and night. You may need to post rules about use of the bathroom because it is a shared space. This could include tips for sharing that include time limits and turn taking. If taking a shower, toileting, and getting ready for the day, a person could easily spend 30 minutes or more. If each private room was set up with a dresser and mirror, it might reduce the time people spend in the bathroom.

The arrival time and checkin procedure is very clear in your listing and the guest obviously violated that. So take a star off of "Observance of House Rules."

Based on what you said and what is written in your listing, I would rate the recent guest as follows for the following reasons:

Star Rating

Cleanliness - 5

"Very clean."

Communication - 4

"Pollte and friendly, but did not accurately communicate time of arrival."

Observance of House Rules - 3

"Did not follow the checkin procedure. Inconsiderate of the needs of host and other guests."

I agree with @J Renato on making good use of private messaging and post a brief but effective public review of   "Friendly guests in terms of pleasantries. However, I believe they are better suited for a non shared space or hotel stay."

[Ian-And-Anne-Marie0]

@Jessica-and-Henry0 

Not at all rude and not at all condescending.

@Lucilla14 sleeps next to the bathroom with the banging door. With no people in the place there will be no noise. With 4 people in the place there will be 4 lots of backward and forward to use the bathroom. Plain, simple fact.

If the door slamming is annoying, it will remain that way until its fixed so that it doesnt slam. Its an easy fix.

@Jessica-and-Henry0 From a guest's point of view if I wanted to have the freedom of using the bathroom for as long as I wanted, feel free to cook at all hours, and not have to care about how much noise I make then I would choose to book and stay a private home listing rather than expect others to put up with me.

@Lucilla14 Does not state that in her house rules. No DON'T DO'S as you state. As far as guests are concerned they would be permitted those uses. Somehow you are implying that guests should be self regulatory. Obviously this is not the case so something needs to change.

Changes to @Lucilla14 's home would be beneficial to her and her space sharing. She can decide whether to do them or not, like updating her house rules. If nothing is done then nothing will change.