Guest review for bizarre behavior

[Tamara3]

Hi All,

I'm torn on how to leave a review for a recent guest. She was a pleasant enough woman, but had such bizarre behavior that I actually added seven NEW items to my house rules since her departure. There were things she did that I didn't even think about, like, "Please don't take my sheets with you when you go to your mom's for Thanksgiving" or "Please supply your own medication"  as this woman constantly asked me for medical supplies as if I was suppose to provide them.  She wasn't mean-spirited or bratty, just clueless. I don't want to tear her down, but I also want to be honest.

Also, do you know what part of the review the guests see? Do they see their own star ratings and whether you'd recommend them? I can't tell from the form what is visible to them besides the write up at the top. 

Thanks for any advice!

[Linda0]

Hello Tamara -
I would not mention the few things you noted here, if someone ask me for aspirin or Tyleno, if I have to give I do so. Also, she may of thought she was doing the right thing to launder your sheets, and as we experience having guest in our homes we learn more about what we as host like and don't like. My house rules seem to grow also and even when I have the very best guests I still find I need another house rule in case they did something I didn't think about but don't like it. Unless the infractions sets in motion possible risks such as safety, hazard, abuse of internet and utilities or property damage i would not mention it in the review.

[Tamara3]

Thanks! I had to do the review last night before I ran out of time, but I didn't mention any specifics. I just said, "There were times when I had to clarify our expectations, but NAME quickly complied." And left it at that.

I don't mind loaning things out in a pinch, but the reliance was irritating. Everything from Advil, to paper, to Benadryl, to detergent to bandaids, to food... It went on... And the messiness that extended beyond her bedroom, taking over rooms not included in her rate, not cleaning up after her dog. The bedding was taken not to wash it (there's a free washer and dry available), but because she said her mom didn't have enough for her to use.  I also caught her in a couple of lies. I live where I rent a room, so it does become too much to have to tell people basic things. I guess I have to seriously consider if I still want to rent if this is par for the course. I have had good experiences prior, so I'm trying to focus on that as well.

Do you send the house rules to people before they book? Maybe I should start doing that before I hang it up. Of course, you never really know if people will comply until you're in the situation.

Thanks for the counsel! I guess I just needed a minute to vent. 🙂

[Linda0]

Totally understand --

Happy Hosting in 2016!!!

[Kate8]

Sounds like a really frustrating situation!

I do believe that house rules are sent to the guest once they have booked the space.  You could always re-send just to be sure, I suppose!

I have also stayed at an Airbnb where they had the house rules listed out in a booklet they left in the room, it was helpful in case we needed to refer to anything in a pinch.

[Tamara3]

It was three long months! I only take longer-term folks since that's easier for me in terms of turnover and cleaning, but I might shorten that after this one. She's making me rethink a lot!

Thanks for the tip about the house rules in the system. I have them printed here for them to review when they arrive. (It includes stuff about the house alarm and the WIFI too), but I think I'll add it to the booking system too. I almost want to send it to them when they inquire as well, so they know what's up before they book. 

[Momi0]

Hi Tamara

I wanted to let you know that I have added a new thing to my rules situation since I too have had people ask me for cold medicine, bandaids, extra sunscreen, aloe vera for their sunburn, TUMS, etc. you name it , they have asked for it.  They have also broken so many rules (just a few guests) that I have now prevented this by doing this....but I am okay with sharing my things with those who just need ONE tylenol because I do mention to them that the next time they are out and about, if they could please pick something up for me (bananas, milk, crackers, etc.  Its like a trade off.....haven't had a problem with anyone wanting to do that.  Some were so generous and even bought more things that I didnt even ask for.  Most have even left me gifts in my house thanking me for being so generous....its the ones who just go into my hall closet to help themselves that I have the most issue with.  I hate posting signs that say do not go into here, so I don't...but I am very clear on my tour, that anything in the bedroom or private bathroom is for the guest. Anything else in my home, is for my family. 

When they send a booking requests or inquiry, the first thing I write to them (BEFORE ACCEPTING) is this...

Thank you _(name)________so much for choosing THE PRIVATE ROOM in our home. We are happy to host you on your upcoming vacation.  I just need one more thing from you before I can choose to APPROVE your requests, Please be sure to read ALL OF OUR RULES, then I would like you to write back saying you have read our rules, understand our rules and will abide by all of the rules.  Any rules found to be violated will result in an early departure and/or fines.  We are a Super Host who would love to host a Super Guest. 

*******************************************************************************

I have had ONLY one guests that didn't want to do that, and actually withdrew their request. I was completely good with that. Saved me the trouble of having a terrible guests in my eyes. Everyone else writes back and does exactly that.  Some even say, its no problem to follow such simple common sense rules but you must have had some horror stories to have those rules....lol

They are right, I have had to add a few rules to our home listing because some people do walk this earth with NO COMMON SENSE.  haha

Hope I was helpful,

Aloha, Momi

SuperHost 

#AirbnbHawaii

[Robin4]

@Momi0  Hi Momi, Wow, I do find that a bit heavy handed! I am suprised only one guest decided to look elsewhere. But if it works for you then, great! Maybe your list of requirements is not large and potential guests would regard them as common sense anyway but, to be threatened with eviction and a fine before even being allowed to book, would ring alarm bells with me I'm afraid. It would tell me that this host is almost doing this under sufference and that they were anticipating that I would be a bad guest......Not a good footing to get off on!! But then again, my guests are in my cottage in the back yard, not my house, so a lot of the potential problems do not arise!

But, as I said if your guests accept this and are happy with it, then, so be it! Definitely not an apprach I would ever use....cheers....Rob

[Momi0]

@Robin While I do understand that you have an opinion.....I was replying TO Tamara.  She posted a concern, a valid concern, and I offered up an idea (she can word it how she wants)  but I was trying to help. I'm still a new host (7months) and appreciate all the people who took the time to help me along the way. So I am paying it forward by hopefully doing the same with my replies. 

Heres' a thought, the next time you have one MALE guest booked, invite that MALE GUEST to stay IN YOUR HOME, just 2 feet from your sweet grandchild bedroom and see how you would react when that same MALE guest brings a STRANGER GIRL at 10:00pm he picked up from the beach to have sex with IN your home....reeking of marijauana too I might add....AND yes, this happened to us!  Along with another situation that required 14 police officers removing one of those ugly guests breaking rules like smoking and damaging our brand new bed with their baby diaper poop leaking, (using our bath towels to clean it up) and then barricading themselves in our home breaking everything in sight after we kindly asked them to leave, and this was after they broke the rules several days in a row. 

This SAME guest physically attacked me and broke 3 of my toes (police arrested him)

So the next time you decide to "offer up your opinion" to another host about how they handle STRANGERS (guests) coming into THEIR HOME where a minor child lives, maybe, take a deep breath, move on and help someone else.  SO, Yes, you did offend me a little in case you were wondering.  

oh yeah, and for the record, we have had NO further problems with guests breaking our rules....I will do whatever I have to do to protect MY CHILD....seems you would have more compassion about that since you are currently in the process of hosting your own precious grandchildren soon.  (yes I read your other comments a few days about "unlisting" your place and chose to ignore what you wrote because it didnt' concern me)

Did I forget to mention that I stay booked to a point that I have given away 5 bookings to other hosts in 2016?  And other hosts have also used my idea about asking guests to write back saying they have read/agree to the rules too.  If a guest has enough respect to be in someone else's home and follow their simple rules, then my message shouldn't offend anyone. Its that simple. The part about being asked to leave early if violation of rules continue is stated IN MY RULES, not in my greeting message.  I was paraphrasing........

I am a Superhost who gives endless amount of Aloha Spirit to my guests who follow all of our rules. They are no longer strangers to me or my family.  They are our friends. Which is my goal with every guests. Something I know that Airbnb really appreciates about me,

Aloha & Amen.

p.s.  I get alot of accolades from my daughters teachers because they are so impressed with her following the rules at her private school on a daily basis.  She has won the "Principal Award" several years in a row too. Seems I am doing a great job as a mom in raising a human being to follow OTHER PEOPLES RULES.  Thats good news for future hosts, right?  haha

[Robin4]

@Momi0 Hi Momi, I completely understand what you say, and I guess I would be the same if that happened to me! And, being a male I have never felt threatened like that, but our situations (yours and mine)  are different on every level, and I did say, if it works for YOU then great!

I am located in a country town in the hills outside my states major city. We are in a major wine producing area. We do NOT attract the type of people you mentioned...which quite frankly, made me shiver too!!

My cottage is entirely seperate from the main house...there is a considerable amount of garden area between the two, so, the guests are never close to me or my wife, and once again, to be honest Momi, I would not host, if it meant having people in the next bedroom. I would regard that as too much of an invasion of my privacy. I don't even like friends staying over in my house!

I am retired and my children have grown up and have families of their own, I don't have the need to be concerned about 'erratic' behaviour on my property where children are concerned.

So Momi, other than both being superhosts, I can't think of anything similar about your situation and mine!

All the guests I have had have been wonderful people, some of whom I have become lasting friends with and wouldn't have conceived, in my mind for a second, the situation you have explained....It is just totally alien to me and that is why I said....If it works for you ( and I totally understand why) then great. My situation is at the opposite end of the hosting scale and I would never consider putting forward such conditions when a guest approaches me....What is that old expression..."Different strokes for different Folks"

Oh, and incidentaly, I was ALSO  responding to @Tamara3 re house rules in an earlier post on this same thead, and this is a forum site where we all share ideas with each other!

All the best Momi and I really hope you continue to successfully  host and stay well away from 'creeps' like that one!!! Cheers....Rob.

[Momi0]

Dear @Robin

thank you so much for understanding.  I super appreciate that you took the time to write back. 

In the next few weeks, I am about to host my first "HOST" meeting at my home with about 30 invited hosts.  I am hoping to learn more from them and hopefully find out how I can be a benefit to them as we work hard to keep Airbnb in Hawaii.  There's been some political backlash because of the negative things that our local politicians hear, and having a police report filed sure didn't help.  

When I was a new host, I truly thought that everyone would come here with common sense knowing they were checking INTO OUR HOME,  but its become quite evident that some come with an "entitled" frame of mind.  I am definitely not accepting every booking these days.  And yes, at least we both take pride in being the best host we can be for everyone.  I am so blessed with the friendships I have made these last 7 months, that we are actually spending our summer vacation hanging out with another couple who spent a week staying in our home. Our daughter just loves them already.  And they love her.  Thanks to Airbnb!  

All the best with your family as you take this time to be more of a grandfather then a host.....seems like a win win for the kids!

p.s.  I have found that looking thru ppls social media accounts has helped me to determine who's a creep or not,  much more then the message board...hahahaha

[Robin4]

@Momi0....Good luck with your host meeting Momi.....It is so refreshing to see that you are taking hosting seriously instead of being merely another 'letting agent!' I would love to hear about the outcome and how it will benefit you.

From my point of view I have had a wonderful past year with Airbnb but I am having to take myself out of circulation for the time and have blanked my calendar for the next few months. Family help requires that my daughter, her partner and our 2 grandchildren are having the use of the cottage over this time until they can get themselves on their feet! I have loved my hosting because all my experiences have been so good! It's not about the money, it's about the wonderful learning curve that this activity has opened up to me.

It really did pain me to read of your experience, and possibly made me feel a bit ashamed by association....being a male! I last felt that when we were in Thailand with all these old balding western men with their young Thai girlfriends....I felt like I didn't want to be a man!

In another sense Momi, I haven't been on the CC forum for long, but as you will see by my level I have been very active and a lot of the time I play 'devils advocate' to put another view across because we as hosts need to look at issues from all angles. I don't say what I say to be deliberately antagonistic....I say it to stimulate good discusion! and when it does, like it has here, I feel we are all winners...

Good luck.....Cheers....Rob

[Linda0]

So some of us have to play host and nurse.

[Marty9]

Would you mind sharing your list of house rules?

[Lois-and-Darryl0]

I keep the House Rules and the House Manual separate.  The House Manual is dedicated to how to operate the amenities and the electronics (the wifi password, etc).  And I email them both of these documents, and then they are provided in hard copies when they arrive.  We have gone from accepting 2 medium dogs (we put up a chain link fence around our property for this), and accepting children, to not accepting either.  But, the vast majority of our Guests are wonderful, beautiful people who love the experience and are appreciative of all we do.  My personal opinion is that I make all of our expectations very clear up front in the House Rules.  It is professional sounding, not gushy or friendly, so it's clear that these are real rules.  And when we communicative, everyone is very friendly and helpful - and we've had nearly all great Guests, and great reviews.  Good Luck.