I have been trying to send a message to a host but I was ask...
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I have been trying to send a message to a host but I was asked to verify phone number which I did. But I can't send a host me...
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Hi everyone! Long story short. My mom and I co-host a private bedroom and bathroom in her house. We've been hosting the same, long-term guest since January of 2020 - she's been great. It worked out perfectly since our place is ideal for short-term stays and do not allow for kitchen or laundry use. When the guest asked us if she could become a long-term guest, she agreed that the listing rules were fine for long-term stays as she doesn't cook (works in the restaurant business, eats all meals there). We allowed her to use our laundry two weeks into her stay, and she uses it once a week. It's just her, she works a lot, leaves for work around 2pm and comes back at 4am.
Last month, she told me that her niece would be coming to stay temporary until her sister and her "figured things out". Our listing comfortably accommodates two guests, so I told her that it was fine and to just update the occupancy listing. Because it seemed like we had a mutually respectable and communicative relationship based on the previous conversations we have had regarding the long-term stay, general discussions throughout the year, etc., I was surprised with all the events that have happened since then.
Her niece, who is apparently 15, came a few days after she informed me of her visit. She never gave us information regarding her niece's name, information, etc. and we didn't really request it because we figured it was a really short-term, temporary thing. I did however, ask to make sure the niece was at least over the age of 12 because she would be home without the guest at times, and we didn't want to have to deal with that. There have been occurrences where the niece would come up to my mom's living room (our private space, not part of the listing) and ask to watch TV or use her phone to text "her mom" - who apparently now happens to be the guest, to order her food because she ran out. Now we're not really sure if the niece is our guest's niece or daughter. I didn't want to pry much, so I didn't ask what that was about and we never mentioned it to the guest. A few days later when the school year started, our Ring doorbell captured her niece getting on a school bus that picked her up right in front of our house (so, it seems like she has been enrolled in a local school).
This is where the problem starts (and yes, the guest knows we have a Ring doorbell) - a few days ago, our Ring doorbell showed two police officers from the County showing up to talk with our guest. She was outside sitting on the front steps and it sounded like the niece had ran away or didn't come home the night before. The guest didn't tell us, so we were absolutely surprised to have police officers on our front lawn that morning. In addition, the guest gave the police officers our door code and they entered our home (!!) to go search for the niece downstairs. Is this even allowed?! She didn't tell us anything at all. I messaged her to let her know that we saw police officers and asked if everything was alright, and all she said was that they were conducting a placement evaluation for her niece. She later told us she enrolled her niece at the local high school, so now, it seems like this isn't exactly a temporarily thing. I told her to please not allow anyone who isn't on the listing to enter the home or have our door code, and if law enforcement is someway involved, that we need to know. My mom is the homeowner and as hosts, I'm almost 99% we absolutely have the right to know. Right? She apologized and said she would let us know next time. Now in the Ring footage, the police officers were heard saying they couldn't find her but to just keep in contact with her. After the police officers left, the Ring footage shows the niece leaving our house. If the police officers couldn't locate her, was she simply hiding elsewhere in our basement? It just puzzles me and I don't know to what extend I'm allowed to request additional information from the guest.
Just this morning, my younger brother came home to two police officers in front of our home again. They watched him get out of his car, bring items in from his car, etc - and said absolutely nothing to him. I messaged our guest again to ask if everything was okay, and she said, "Yes, they are conducting a placement evaluation, they didn't go inside." I'm not sure that AirBnBs are considered an appropriate placement for a minor, I'm not even sure that the police officers know we are an AirBnB. Basically, we have police officers showing up to our home, watching it, and not knowing any details. Now that this doesn't seem like a temporary stay with the niece, and with the school enrollment and police officers going on, I have no idea what's even appropriate to do or ask our guest. I did, however, call the County non-emergency number to ask if they could tell me more about what was going on in our home, and she gave me the responding officer and jurisdiction details so that I could call them and speak with them - she did mention that the police had been called three times within the past two weeks to our home, though (and of course, not from any of us).
I saw that on AirBnB's terms and conditions, item 4.1 under "Your Responsibilities and Assumption of Risk" states... "If you are booking for an additional guest who is a minor or if you bring a minor to a Host Service, you must be legally authorized to act on behalf of the minor and you are solely responsible for the supervision of that minor." Do I have the right to just message the guest and say, "Hey, because it's under AirBnB's terms and conditions, and apparently she's now enrolled in a local school with our address, and now law enforcement is showing up, can you give us her identification / proof that you are her legal guardian, so that if anything happens, we can't be responsible or lose our ability to host?" Obviously, this is a situation of the guest getting extremely comfortable. I'm not asking her to give me all the details of her life, but especially when we are the hosts, and barely know nothing, I feel like we have a right to just ask for a bit more details. My mother and I are never ones to quickly judge, but we want to be safe and not held liable for anything we don't know about. For all I know, the niece could be a juvenile delinquent, or the guest (mom/aunt) could be illegally hiding her from her real parents, NO idea. We just don't want to have to deal with that, especially on our property and within our home and neighborhood. I haven't texted her yet, but I might wait to speak with the officer in the morning to request details of why they've been watching our home. It's also weird that the niece seems to be hiding whenever the officers come around.
Anyone else experience a similar situation? What would be the most appropriate way to handle this? All thoughts appreciated - thank you!
@Tina7837 It is time for the guest (and her child) to go. Good luck getting her to leave. By the way, I believe that once the child was enrolled in school and is picked up at your address, the tenant (guest) is now a resident and has rights beyond an AirBnB rental. If you want just the child gone or both of them gone, you are going to need a lawyer.
She needs a lawyer pronto @Lorna170 But in her last message she seemed to still think it "hadn't come to that. " This mistake will only get more expensive as time passes, unfortunately.
It seems @Tina7837 thinks she owes something to her guest, like to remain kind and friendly, but the guest isn't acting the same way. Otherwise she would be frank and honest and told her host what's going on.
Many years ago I was renting a huge, unrenovated [but charming] apartment. All was fine, and then a new family moved downstairs. I would run into the daughter and half a dozen of her friends on the steps/porch. They would glare and never move to create a path for entry. Then the police started showing up routinely. I moved. I have no idea if the daughter or her parents were at fault or what the issues were. I only know that I began to feel unsafe in my own space. Risk management. I may not have been in reality at risk for anything, but maybe I was. Since I was able to leave the situation, I did.
Many times in life we have to protect ourselves, that doesn't mean we can't feel sympathy and empathy or that we can't also be cordial and kind. But the bottom line, is that if chaos enters your life, you should work hard to eliminate it where you can.
@Mark116 A friend of mine used to rent rooms in her big house long term. She was really trying to help out people she knew, or friends of friends, by offering inexpensive accommodation.
But after years of people not coming up with the rent on time, asking to store things briefly when they moved out that they never came back for, and bringing their personal issues into her household, including exes coming around causing trouble, problems involving the police, and a suicide, she had had enough and started doing strs.
When a host or landlord's understanding and empathy is taken advantage of, rather than appreciated, it's time to cut your losses.